Banky Edwards This is all going to end badly.
Played by Jason Lee 
Chasing Amy (1997) · 61 quotes
Chasing Amy (1997) · 61 quotes
Most-quoted character in Chasing Amy (1997): in 28 of its 61 quotes
Most scenes with: Holden McNeil (7), Hooper X (3), Alyssa Jones (2)
All every woman really wants, be it mother, senator, nun, is some serious deep-dickin'.
More lines from Banky Edwards
14 quotes Banky Edwards Banky Edwards I feel a hate crime coming on.
Banky Edwards [to Alyssa]
Since you like chicks, right, do you just look at yourself naked in the mirror all the time?
Banky Edwards Archie is not **** Mr. Weatherbee!
Banky Edwards [on receiving lovemaking instruction]
Like CNN and the Weather Channel: constant updates.
Banky Edwards Now THAT, my friend, is a shared moment.
Banky Edwards What difference does it make if I refer to her as a d*ke? Or if I call the Whalers a bunch of f***ots in the comfort of my own office, far from the sensitive ears of the rest of the world?
Banky Edwards I'm going to prove to you beyond a shadow of a doubt that Archie is all about pussy.
Banky Edwards Everyone has an agenda. Everyone.
Banky Edwards I'm telling you that chick is probably a bigger germ farm than that monkey in Outbreak.
Banky Edwards Bring on the free hooch!
Banky Edwards [showing one of his porno magazines to a kid at the train station]
And then, Black Beauty couldn't take it any more and he finally did some of his own mounting.
Banky Edwards What's a Nubian?
Banky Edwards Catholic school girls. The uniform's what does it for me. I wish I had've went with more Catholic school girls when I was a kid. As it stands I have no, "And then she unzipped her jumper," stories.
Scenes with Banky Edwards
13 scenes Banky I just have to get something.
[Pulls out a huge stack of porno books]
Oh my God. Who are you, Larry **** Flynt? What are you going to do with all of those?
Banky Read the articles. What do you think I'm going to do with them? They're stroke books, stupid!
You've got like thirty books there! We're only going to be gone for two days!
Banky Variety's the spice of life. I like a wide selection. Sometimes I'm in the mood for nasty close-ups, sometimes I like them arty and air-brushed. Sometimes it's a spread brown-eye kind of night, sometimes it's girl-on-girl time. Sometimes a steamy letter will do it, sometimes - not often, but sometimes - I like the idea of a chick with a horse.
Check this shit. You got cr***er farm boy Luke Skywalker, Nazi poster boy, blond hair, blue eyes. And then you got Darth Vader, the blackest brother in the galaxy, Nubian god!
Banky What's a "Nubian"?
Shut the **** up!
And Jedi's the most insulting installment. Because Vader's beautiful black visage is sullied when he pulls off his mask to reveal a feeble, crusty, old white man! They tryin' to tell us that deep inside we all wants to be white!
Banky Well, isn't that true?
How do you manage to get away with this all the time? I mean, shouldn't the cops be busting your head open right about now?
Banky Wrong coast.
I need to sell the image to sell the book. I mean, would the audience still buy the whole black rage angle if they found out the book was written by a... you know...
Banky ****?
When you say it, it sounds so sexy. [kisses Banky]
Banky Who should I sign it to?
Little Kid I don't want you to sign it. I want the guy who draws Bluntman and Chronic to sign it. [snatches the comic away] You're just a tracer.
Collector Tell him, little shaver.
Collector [Banky is strangling the Collector]
You're mucking with a G, you ****in' tracer.
Banky I'll trace a chalk line around your dead **** body, you ****!
Collector [as he's being dragged away by Security Guard]
Hey wait a second! He jumped me, you **** tracer!
Banky YOUR MOTHER'S A TRACER!
Banky What traffic? It's 1:30 in the morning!
Yeah, and rush hour starts in six hours. Let's go.
Let me ask you something. Can men **** each other?
Banky What, are you asking for my permission?
In your estimation.
Banky Yeah, sure.
So for you, to **** means to penetrate. You're used to the more traditional definition. You, inside some girl you duped, jackhammering away, not noticing the bored look in her eyes.
Banky Hey, I always notice the bored look in their eyes.
**** you.
Banky Not even if you let me video tape it.
So, uh, what do you wanna do tonight?
Banky I dunno. Get a pizza, watch "Degrassi Jr. High".
You got a weird thing for Canadian melodrama.
Banky I got a weird thing for girls who say, "Aboot."
Banky What the **** is going on here?
I'm starting a new page?
Banky [Banky grabs the pen out of Holden's hand and throws it]
Not with this shit, what the **** is going on with you and that girl?
We're just friends!
Banky She's programming you!
I beg your pardon? Programming?
Banky Yeah, and apparently you don't even **** realize it!
Banky Alright, now see this? This is a four-way road, OK? And dead in the center is a crisp, new, hundred dollar bill. Now, at the end of each of these streets are four people, OK? Are you following?
Yeah.
Banky Good. Over here, we have a male-affectionate, easy to get along with, non-political agenda lesbian. Down here, we have a man-hating, angry as ****, agenda of rage, bitter d**e. Over here, we got Santa Claus, and up here the Easter Bunny. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first?
What is this supposed to prove?
Banky No, I'm serious. This is a serious exercise. It's like an SAT question. Which one is going to get to the hundred dollar bill first? The male-friendly lesbian, the man-hating d**e, Santa Claus, or the Easter bunny?
The man-hating d**e.
Banky Good. Why?
I don't know.
Banky Because the other three are figments of your **** imagination!
