Ed O'Neill movie quotes

49 quotes from 4 movies

Wayne's World (1992) as Mikita's manager, Glen

View Quote (speaking to the camera) I'd never done a crazy thing in my life before that night. Why is it that if a man kills another man in battle it's called heroic, yet if he kills a man in the heat of passion it's called murder?

View Quote You know, if you stab a man in the dead of winter, steam will rise up from the wounds. Indians believed it was his soul escaping from his body.

View Quote Tiny: Wayne. How you doin'?
Wayne: Hey, Tiny, who's playing today?
Tiny: Jolly Green Giants and the Shitty Beatles.
Wayne: Shitty Beatles? Are they any good?
Tiny: They suck.
Wayne: Then it's not just a clever name.

All 36 quotes from Mikita's manager, Glen »

Finding Dory (2016) as Hank

View Quote [introducing to Dory] Name's Hank.

View Quote So, give me your tag!

View Quote And steer clear of people, will you? Especially kids! I don't want to be touched!

All 8 quotes from Hank »

Little Giants (1994) as Kevin O'Shea

View Quote Danny O'Shea: This whole town may love you, but I'm the only one who knows how truly sick you are!
Kevin O'Shea: I treated you like a prince!
Danny O'Shea: You ignored me!
Kevin O'Shea: I took you to see the Cleveland Indians!
Danny O'Shea: You left me at the stadium!
Kevin O'Shea: Ahh!

View Quote Mike Hammersmith: [Upon seeing Becky emerge from the locker room dressed up in Giant gear] Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa. What's that cheerleader doing with a helmet on?
Kevin O'Shea: That's no cheerleader. That's my niece, Becky. She's pissed.

View Quote Kevin O'Shea: [Upon discovering a peanut butter and jelly sandwich inside of Rudy's helmet] Peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Are you nuts?
Rudy Zolteck: [Takes a bite] It's still good!
Kevin O'Shea: You'll never get anywhere treating your helmet like a lunchbox, son. [Sees Butz pull something else out of the helmet] What are those?
Butz: Cheetos.
Kevin O'Shea: Crunchy or Puffed?
Butz: Puffed.
Kevin O'Shea: [Under his breath] Whimp.

All 4 quotes from Kevin O'Shea »

Wayne's World 2 (1993) as Glen

View Quote Glen (Mikita's Manager): [...] I wish to God that someone would be able to block out the voices in my head for five minutes, the voices that scream, over and over again: "Why do they come to me to die? Why do they come to me to die?"