Crispin Glover movie quotes

View Quote [Sighs] Poor, poor Weenie. Who knows the horrors you've seen?

View Quote How are you gonna look sitting by the pool?

View Quote Don't worry, we will get through it together.

View Quote George: Hey you get your damn hands off her! Do you really think I oughta swear?
Marty: Yes, definitely. Goddammit George, swear!

View Quote George: Last night, Darth Vader came down from planet Vulcan and told me that if I didn't ask Lorraine out that he'd melt my brain.
Marty: Okay George, let's just keep this brain melting stuff to ourselves, okay?
George: Oh yeah, right.

View Quote George: [to Lorraine] I'm your density. [Pauses, checks note]...destiny.

View Quote [Fifi and Roger are flying through the air in the Maslova Family Circus]
Roger: Pretty!
Fifi: Oh no!
[Fifi and Roger go through a ring of fire]

View Quote Ringmaster: Please welcome... the Juggling Pugs!
[The camera zooms over to two pugs juggling balls, along with Fifi]
Elliot: [Whispering] Fifi! Do *you* see him?
Fifi: [Not paying attention] Heh heh. Do I see what?

View Quote [In Bob and Bobbie's trailer, Mr. Weenie and his domestic friends are all looking at the Maslova Family Circus poster]
Fifi: I've seen those lights before.
[He runs over to the window]
Mr. Weenie: Wait. You mean ze circus is just behind zose trees?
Fifi: Yes, my new old friend! Boog is closer than we ever imagined!

View Quote Willy: Who wants to chew my gumballs?

View Quote Willy: You're... mine now.

View Quote Willy: Who wants to play with Willy?

View Quote Stayne: [sees Alice] And who is this lovely creature?
Red Queen: Um, my new favorite.
Stayne: What is her name?
Red Queen: Um.
Stayne: [to Alice] I believe your name has slipped the queen's mind.
Red Queen: Her name is Um, idiot!
Alice: From Umbridge.

View Quote Stayne: [has his arm around Hatter's throat] If you're hiding her, you will lose your heads.
Hatter: [strained] Already lost them.

View Quote Stayne: You're all mad!
March Hare: Thanks very much. [Belches loudly]

View Quote He thinks that's funny. He thinks that's a funny thing he's doing.

View Quote Jimmy: Ted, I think... I think when we get to town, I should call Betty.
Ted: Jimbo, calling Betty is definitely a dumb thing to do. Look, first rule of love: never get rejected by the same girl twice, I mean that's useless. If you want to make a fool out of yourself, always do it with someone new.
Jimmy: I don't know anyone new.
Ted: Well, love is a great way to meet them.

View Quote Ted: You broke up with "B.J. Betty"?
Jimmy: So to speak. And would you lay off her? She's alright!
Ted: I'll say she's alright. That girl wanted to be treated right! You should have treated her right!
Jimmy: I did! I treated her right! I treated her right, that's what's driving me so crazy. I mean first she would tell me to call because she had something else she needed to do. Then she wouldn't even take my calls! I mean, can you figure that? What the hell happened?
Ted: Let me put this into the old computer.
Jimmy: No, Ted, I'm serious about this.
Ted: Hey, the computer didn't lie. [Imitates using a computer, pauses, then smiles]
Jimmy: What?
Ted: It says... it says you're dead.
Jimmy: What? Dead?
Ted: Lousy, you know. [limps his wrist] A moron.
Jimmy: Oh! Don't hold back on me, Doc, give it to me straight!
Ted: I did not say it; the computer did!
Jimmy: Yeah, well there is no computer!
Ted: Aha! And there's no Betty, either.
Jimmy: And I'm dead?
Ted: Like I said, the computer don't lie.
Jimmy: Man, I'm beat...