"Accident" my ass, Gary! My parents are coming home, Chet's coming home; they're gonna freak out!
Weird Science quotes
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Dino
Tell me something. What's a beautiful broad like you doing with a malaka like this? Huh?
It's purely sexual.
Dino
No shit.
She's into malakas, Dino!
Dino
[after a brief pause, Dino and his friends laugh]
"She's into malakas"! Do you believe that?!
Should we give her a brain?
Yeah, we could play chess with her.
Chess? Look, just give her a brain, okay?
Have you ever wondered how sad it is, that your son's only sexual outlet is tossing off to magazines in the bathroom?
Lucy Wallace Oh Gary! Oh my God!
Ma, I never tossed off to anything!
Lucy Wallace You told me you were combing your hair!
I was! I was!
Do you think Lisa's having a good time?
Lisa could have a good time at an insurance seminar, Wyatt.
What are we gonna do with her?
Look, we'll just go with the situation. Okay? And I'm sure by Sunday, you'll think of something. You're a very bright guy. I have a lot of faith in you. Okay? All right?
I'm just being practical.
I know you are. Okay? And I appreciate it.
But what are we gonna do about this mess?
Wyatt, you'll have plenty of time to clean up tomorrow. Okay?
Okay, but don't get any B.O. on Chet's suit, or he'd kill me.
[they walk out of the room and their nerdy suits suddenly transform into posh suits]
Where are we going, anyway?
I don't know. She said we're gonna go downtown and... [looks at the suits] Oh, my God! Whose stuff is this? Is that your stuff? Is this yours?
Oh, shit. Gary, I don't know what's goin'--
Wyatt, what's goin' on here?
I don't know.
What is goin' on here?
Gary, I don't know!
I don't know what's goin' on here!
You look good though! All right?!
Yeah?!
Yeah.
[before the party, Gary, Wyatt, and Lisa wait at the table for the guests]
Lisa, you have to promise me that things aren't gonna get outta control.
Wyatt, don't worry. You're just having a few friends over.
I don't have any friends, Lisa.
He doesn't. Boy ain't lyin'.
[the three walk up to the door, and Lisa opens it, revealing, to Gary and Wyatt's shock, an entire street full of party guests]
Hi!
Guests HI!!!
One guest
PARTY!
All guests [chant]
Party! Party! Party! Party!
[Gary sheepishly waves hello as Wyatt faints]
[Gary and Wyatt have a quick chat in the shower]
I could be wrong, but I think these guys are stoked for us, Wyatt.
I got that feelin' myself.
What do we do?
I don't know.
Should we go for it?
What about Lisa?
She did say we should party.
Look, let's get on with these two, score points, and go back to Lisa. This is like a dream come true.
How about if we see if we can score the points with these two and deal with them in case we get to them later?
Sounds good.
Okay, but whatever happens, we've gotta give Lisa a shot. I don't wanna hurt her feelings. Maybe the girls are lookin' for a long lean bone job from me. Ready to party now?
10-4.
Let's break.
[Gary and Wyatt have hidden from freaks who've destroyed Wyatt's home.]
Gary, do you feel like a chicken?
Well, if I could shoot an egg outta my ass right now, I would.
But...won't these people think that we're cowards?
Yeah...okay, but we can deal with shame. Death is a much greater issue.
[Gary is mumbling some incomprehensible gibberish over the doll that will become Lisa.]
Gary...? By the way, why are we wearing bras on our heads?
It's ceremonial.
[to Wyatt's grandparents after they arrive unannounced]
You ought to know better than to walk into somebody's house and start hitting people with your Rex Harrison hat!
A missle! A MISSLE! A missle in my house, Gary!
Accident? An accident?! Do you realize it's snowing in my room, goddammit?!
Cheer up or I'll blow your face off!
Chet. My name is Chet! And I didn't think it was a whale's dick, honey.