Twister (1996) · 36 quotes
Tied for 7th most-quoted character in Twister (1996): in 3 of its 36 quotes
Most scenes with: Bill (2)
Y'know, in a severe lightning storm, you want to grab your ankles and stick your butt in the air.
Haynes He's right. If you're gonna get hit it's the safest orifice.
Yeah, I'd like to get hit by lightning once, y'know, see what it's like.
No, that was a good size twister. What was it, an F-3?
Solid F-2.
See, now you've lost me again.
It's the Fujita Scale. It measures the intensity of a tornado by how much it eats.
Eats?
Destroys.
The one we last encountered was a strong F-2, maybe an F-3.
Maybe we'll see some F-4's today.
Haynes That would be sweet!
4 is good. 4 will relocate your house very efficiently.
Is there an F-5? [silence falls over the group] What would that be like?
...The Finger of God.
None of you has ever seen an F-5?
...Just one of us.
YES, she's very nice. NO, she does not work at the station, she...she's a therapist.
CHRIST!
What?!
-You couldn't resist, could you?
I'm not saying you-
Come on.
-need therapy!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, I need therapy?
I didn't say that!
I need a therapist?
[Jo: I didn't say that!
What could I possibly need a therapist for?
I don't know.
You're the doctor, tell me.
I don't know! Um... inability to finish things? Maybe rushing into things you can't quite commit to?
Commitment?
You asked me.
Look...
YOU ASKED ME!
NO, that is BULLSHIT. Look, I may-
You asked-
have walked out, [looks away from the road and at Jo] but at least I showed up in the first place...
Okay, THERE'S A WHOLE ROAD THING GOING ON OUT HERE, OKAY?
You never had the slightest idea about commitment - what being married means! [truck veers into the grass] Like-like... stability, supportiveness, and a house, and all kinds of neat stuff like that!
Can I drive?
NO.
WHOA!! [steers the car to safety] Damn...
Somebody should warn her about your temper.
Jo, I swear to-
She obviously has no idea what she's getting herself into.
' Stay the hell out of it. I know exactly what I'm doing!
What exactly are you doing?
What am I doing?
Haynes I think they're getting better at this.
THANK YOU. I am happy. I'm a happy person. I'm happy with my life. I'm happy with the way things are going in my life. I'm happy with... [falls apart] with-- with-- with-- with--
Melissa?
You look happy. You're happy.
I AM.
