Stripes quotes

View Quote Psycho: My name's Francis Sawyer... but everyone calls me Psycho. Any of you guys call me Francis... I'll kill ya.
Leon: Ooooooh.
Psycho: You just made the list, buddy. Also, I don't like no one touching my stuff. So just keep your meathooks off. If I catch any of you guys in my stuff... I'll kill ya. And I don't like nobody touching me. Any of you homos touch me... I'll kill ya.
Sergeant Hulka: Lighten up, Francis. We're all in this together. One of these men may save your life one of these days, you understand that?
'Winger: Then again maybe one of us won't.

View Quote Sergeant Hulka: Okay, Mr. Push-ups, let's hear your story.
John Winger: Chicks dig me, because I rarely wear underwear and when I do it's usually something unusual. But now I know why I have always lost women to guys like you. I mean, it's not just the uniform. It's the stories that you tell. So much fun and imagination.
[points to the soldier next to him]
John Winger: Lee Harvey, you are a madman. When you stole that cow, and your friend tried to make it with the cow. I want to party with you, cowboy. But the two of us together? Forget it! I'm gonna go out on a limb here. I'm gonna volunteer my leadership to this platoon. An army without leaders is like a foot without a big toe. And Sergeant Hulka isn't always gonna be here to be that big toe for us. I think that we owe a big round of applause to our newest, bestest buddy, and big toe... Sergeant Hulka.
[the soldiers start clapping]
Sergeant Hulka: Well, okay, hotshot. We're gonna see what kind of soldier you are.

View Quote General Barnicke: Where the hell have you been, soldier?
John Winger: Traaaaaaaining, sir!
Soldiers: Training, sir!
General Barnicke: What kind of training, son?
John Winger: Aaaaaaarmy training, sir!
Soldiers: Army training, sir!
[laughter]
General Barnicke: Where's your drill sergeant, men?
John Winger: Blown up, sir!
Capt. Stillman: Uhh, yes, sir, these are Sgt. Hulka's men. He was injured during basic training.
General Barnicke: I soo. So am I to understand you men completed your training on your own?
John Winger: Tha's the fact, Jack!
Soldiers: That's the fact, Jack!
General Barnicke: Captain, these are exactly the kind of go-getters I want on my EM-50 project.
Capt. Stillman: But, sir . . .
General Barnicke: Don't "But" me, Captain. I want them on the plane. Tonight!
John Winger: Gentlemen, it's party time...battalion style!

View Quote John Winger: C'mon, it's Czechoslovakia. We zip in, we pick 'em up, we zip right out again. We're not going to Moscow. It's Czechoslovakia. It's like we're going into Wisconsin.
Russell Ziskey: Well, I got the shit kicked out of me in Wisconsin once. Forget it.

View Quote Capt. Stillman: It looks like a fine group of men, Sergeant.
Ox: I sure hope this is the mess hall! (to Stillman, observing his Captain insignia): How's it goin', Eisenhower?!
Sgt. Hulka: Yes, sir, a fine group of men.
Russell Ziskey: [teaching an English class to foreigners] Okay, I know you're anxious to jump right in and start speaking English, but there's a couple of things I need to know first, because I've never done this before. So, how many of you would say you speak English fairly well, but with some difficulties?
[pause]
Russell Ziskey: A little English?
[a man raises his hand]
Russell Ziskey: Yes? You speak some English?
Man: Son of bitch. Shit.
Class: [in unison] Son of bitch. Shit.

View Quote Captain Stillman: Well, explain yourselves.
Dewey Oxburger: We were going to the Bingo parlour...at the YMCA. Well, one thing led to another, and the instructions got all fouled up and...
Captain Stillman: Shut up.
Dewey Oxburger: Okay, Sir.
Captain Stillman: You men are a disgrace! Maybe a few days in the stockade will help you change your rotten attitudes.
Cruiser: But um, we're supposed to graduate tomorrow, sir.
Captain Stillman: That's even better. Tomorrow you're going to be on parade in front of General Barnicke. And when he sees what total **** ups you really are, I will personally recommend that the whole platoon will repeat the entire course of basic training.

View Quote Sergeant Hulka: We got a full day ahead of us. We're gonna start out with a five-mile run.
[Soldiers groan]
John Winger: I know that I'm speaking for the entire platoon when I say this run should be postponed until this platoon is better rested.
Sergeant Hulka: Well, I'll tell you what, soldier. Let's make it ten miles.

View Quote Captain Stillman: All right, soldier, let's see how you fire that mortar.
Soldier with Mortar: What coordinates, sir?
Captain Stillman: [annoyed] Coordinates?
Soldier with Mortar: Yes, sir, they determine where the mortar's...
Captain Stillman: Soldier, the army has spent a lot of money teaching you to fire that thing. Now set it and fire it.
Soldier with Mortar: Sir, we don't know where the shell's gonna...
Captain Stillman: Soldier. The only way to learn anything is to do it. Now fire the weapon.

View Quote Y'know, one day, Tito Puente will be dead, and you'll say, "Oh, I've been listening to him for years, and I think he's fabulous."

View Quote My doctor says I've been swallowing a lot of aggression, along with a lot of pizzas.

View Quote Recruiter: Now, are either of you homosexuals?
John Winger: You mean like flaming?
Recruiter: Well, it's a standard question we have to ask.
Russell Ziskey: No, we're not homosexual, but we are willing to learn.
John Winger: Yeah . . . Would they send us someplace special?

View Quote Well, my name's Dewey Oxburger. My friends call me Ox. I dont know if you've noticed, but I got a slight weight problem.

View Quote Cruiser: I joined the army 'cause my father and my brother were in the army. I figured I better join before I got drafted.
Sergeant Hulka: Son, there ain't no draft no more.
Cruiser: There was one?

View Quote Louise Cooper: It's called 'Force Field' and you try to get as close as you can without touching.
Russell Ziskey: Oh, I think I'm good at this.
Louise Cooper: We'll see.
[Louise lays down, Russell hovers over her, then kisses her.]
Louise Cooper: You broke my force field.
Russell Ziskey: Yeah, you win. [kisses her]

View Quote I've always been kind of a pacifist. When I was a kid, my father told me, "Never hit anyone in anger, unless you're absolutely sure you can get away with it." I don't know what kind of soldier I'm gonna make, but I want you guys to know that if we ever get into really heavy combat... I'll be right behind you guys. Every step of the way.