John Heard movie quotes

View Quote (to Kevin) KEVIN!! YOU SPENT $967 ON ROOM SERVICE?!?

View Quote Kate: Honey, are you packed yet?
Kevin: Yes.
Kevin on Recorder: Yes.
Kate: Everything I put out?
Kevin: Yes.
Kevin on Recorder: Yes.
Kate: Did you see what Grandma Penelope sent you for the trip?
Kevin: Let me guess. Donald Duck slippers?
Kate: Close. An inflatable clown to play with in the pool.
Kevin: [sarcastically] How exciting. Why do we have to go to Florida? There's no Christmas trees in Florida.
Kate: Kevin, what is it with you and Christmas trees?
Kevin: How can you have Christmas without a Christmas tree, Mom?
Kate: We'll find a nice fake silver one. Or decorate a palm tree.
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Peter: Where's the camcorder battery?
Kate: I put it in the charger. How's this? Oh, much better.
Peter: Hey, Kevin, you'd better go put your tie on. We don't wanna be late for the Christmas pageant.
Kevin: My tie's in the bathroom and I can't go in because Uncle Frank's taking a shower. He says that if I walked in there and saw him naked, I'd grow up never feeling like a real man. [Peter and Kate stare] Whatever that means.
Peter: [after a pause, chuckles] I'm sure he was kidding. Just run in there, get your tie, get out, and don't look at anything.

View Quote [In Miami, Peter picks Kevin's bag off the baggage claim carousel; it is passed from one family member to another]
Peter: This Kevin's? Give this to Kevin.
Kate: Give this... [tries to pass it to Frank, who waves her off; she passes it to Leslie instead] Give this to Kevin.
Leslie: Give this to Kevin.
Tracy: Give this to Kevin.
Linnie: Kevin.
Buzz: Give this to Kevin.
Rod: Give this to Kevin.
Sondra: Give this to Kevin.
Megan: Give this to Kevin.
Jeff: Give this to Kevin.
Brooke: Give this to Kevin.
Fuller: Here you go, Kevin. [notices the elderly couples are standing next to him instead of Kevin. He passes bag up the line] Kevin's not here.
Brooke: Kevin's not here.
Jeff: Kevin's not here.
Megan: Kevin's not here.
Sondra: Kevin's not here.
Rod: Kevin's not here. [he passes the bag to Linnie, and he decided to skip Buzz]
Linnie: Kevin's not here.
Tracy: Kevin's not here.
Leslie: Kevin's not here. [passes bag to Kate, skipping Frank]
Kate: [she gives the bag to Peter] Kevin's not here.
Peter: [incredulously] What?!
Kate: [laughs, but immediately gasps in shock, then screams at the top of her lungs in alarm] KEVIN!!!!!!!!! [faints]

View Quote [the McCallisters hurriedly head out of the house for the vans to the airport]
Frank: There's no way on Earth we're gonna make this plane. It leaves in 45 minutes.
Peter: Think positive, Frank.
Frank: You be positive. I'll be realistic.

View Quote Kate: [to Kevin] What is the matter with you?!
Kevin: He started it! He ate my pizza on purpose! He knows I'd hate sausage, and olives, and onions, and...
Uncle Frank: [cutting him off] Look what you did, you little jerk!
[Everyone goes quiet, looking at Kevin]
Kate: Kevin, get upstairs right now.
Kevin: Why?
Jeff: Kevin, you're such a disease.
Kevin: Shut up!
Peter: Kevin, upstairs!
Kate: Say good night, Kevin.
Kevin: [sarcastically] "Good night, Kevin". Why do I always get treated like scum?
Kate: [to Pizza Boy] Oh, I am sorry. This house is just crazy. We've got all these extra kids running around. My brother-in-law drove in from Ohio today. It's just nuts.
Kevin: How come you didn't bring any more cheese pizzas?
Pizza Boy: Nice tip. Thanks a lot.
Kate: Thanks.
Harry: Having a reunion or something?
Kate: My husband's brother transferred to Paris last year. His kids are still there. He missed the family, so he invited us to Paris so we can be together.
Harry: You're taking a trip to Paris?
Kate: Yes, we hope to leave tomorrow morning.
Harry: Excellent, excellent.
Kate: If you'll excuse me, this one's a little out of sorts. I'll be right back.
Harry: Don't worry about me. I spoke to your husband already. And don't worry about your home. It's in good hands.
Kate: [escorting Kevin to the attic after he caused trouble in the kitchen] There are 15 people in this house. You're the only one who has to make trouble.
Kevin: I'm the only one getting dumped on.
Kate: You're the only one actin' up. Now, get upstairs.
Kevin: I am upstairs, dummy. Third floor?
Kate: Go there.
Kevin: It's scary up there.
Kate: Don't be silly. Fuller will be up in a little while.
Kevin: I don't wanna sleep with Fuller. You know about him. He wets the bed. He'll pee all over me. I know it!
Kate: Fine. We'll put him someplace else.
Kevin: I'm sorry.
Kate: It's a tad late. So, get upstairs.
Kevin: Everyone in this family hates me.
Kate: Then, maybe you should ask Santa for a new family.
Kevin: I don't want a new family! I don't want any family! Families suck!
Kate: Just stay up there. I don't wanna see you again for the rest of the night.
Kevin: I don't wanna see you again for the rest of my whole life. And I don't wanna see anybody else, either.
Kate: [feeling hurt] I hope you don't mean that. You'd feel pretty sad if you woke up tomorrow morning and you didn't have a family.
Kevin: No, I wouldn't.
Kate: Then, say it again. Maybe it'll happen.
Kevin: I hope that I never see any of you jerks again! [runs upstairs in a huff, and Kate closes the door]
Kate: Suit yourself.

View Quote Kevin: Mom, Uncle Frank won't let me watch the movie, but the big kids can. Why can't I?
Kate: Kevin, I'm on the phone. [on the phone] When do you come back? Not till then?
Kevin: It's not even rated R. He's just being a jerk.
Kate: Kevin, if Uncle Frank says no, then, it must be really bad. [on the phone] No, no one is bringing the dog, we're putting it in the kennel for the... Hey, get off! Kevin, out of the room.
Kevin: Hang up the phone and make me, why don't ya?
Kate: This kid.
Peter: Hey, did you pick up a voltage adapter thing?
Kate: No, I didn't have time to do that.
Peter: Then, how do I shave in France?
Kate: Grow a goatee.
Kevin: Dad, nobody'll let me do anything.
Peter: I've got something, why don't you pick up those Micro-Machines that are in there. Aunt Leslie stepped on one and almost broke her neck.
Kate: He was in the garage again playing with the glue gun.
Peter: Didn't we talk about that?
Kevin: Did I burn down the joint? I don't think so. I made ornaments out of fishhooks.
Peter: My new fishhooks?
Kevin: I can't make ornaments out of the old ones with dry worm guts stuck on them.
Kate: Peter?
Peter: Come on, Kevin. Out here.

View Quote Paul: What is so special about Baskin?
Susan: He's a grown up.

View Quote Josh: I'm much better at video hockey.
Paul: That's not a sport.
Josh: It requires hand and eye coordination.
Paul: It's not a sport if you don't sweat.
Josh: What about golf? It's a sport and you don't sweat.
Paul: It's not a sport if you let a machine do all the work.
Josh: What about car racing?
Paul: Shut up, Baskin.

View Quote Paul: Have you tried Mattel?
Susan: Yes.
Paul: Well, how about Coleco?
Susan: Yes, as well as Fisher Price and Worlds of Wonder. None of these places reported ever having a Josh Baskin on their payroll.
Paul: Well, he's got to come from somewhere. The guy just does not come into the executive offices out of the blue.
Susan: Face it Paul, the man comes from data processing.
Paul: It's a mystery.
[Susan pours milk into her coffee. She has not seen the reverse side, which has a picture of the young Josh]
Milk Carton: MISSING: JOSHUA BASKIN