Fabious I want you to be gay with me and Father.
I don't want to be gay with you two. I'd rather just stay in here with my blade and **** things up.
Played by James Franco 
Your Highness (2011) · 34 quotes
Your Highness (2011) · 34 quotes
2nd most-quoted character in Your Highness (2011): in 13 of its 34 quotes
Most scenes with: Thadeous (13), Wizard (4), Courtney (2)
Scenes with Fabious
13 scenes Fabious I'm sick and tired of everyone sucking up on your tits because you are to become King. All the while no one gives two turtle shits about me.
Fabious Thady, first borns like me become King. Second borns, well, you can be whatever you want to be.
I want to be King.
Fabious Maybe we can both be King.
No, I want to be King by myself.
Fabious You're going to be so handsome. Who is going to be the most handsome best man?
Probably me.
Fabious Who's the prince with the most dashing moustache?
Me.
Fabious Who gives the warmest hugs?
Me, of course.
Fabious I love you, Thadeous.
That's cool.
Come, come. Give me kisses.
Fabious [Fabious kisses the wizard] [to Thadeous]
Kiss him.
****, no.
Pretty please?
Fabious Kiss him on the mouth. Part of the quest. I do it every time I come.
Sit, sit. Fabious has been coming here since he was a boy.
You did this when you were a child?
Fabious Yes. We had great times, didn't we?
Yes, yes, we did.
You would kiss him?
Fabious Sometimes we would do other things.
Like what?
Fabious When I was younger we'd take our shirts off and jump on the bed.
Playful secrets.
Breathe deeply of these herbs and share a vision with me.
Yes, allow me to puff as well.
Fabious These are some powerful herbs. Giving me dark visions.
Shall we pack this again? I'm not getting visions, I'm not sure if it's working, Wizard.
Fabious Thadeous, are you seeing what I'm seeing?
You making a fool of yourself. Handle your shit, Fabious.
Not so fast. First, you must answer a riddle. What journey be long and twisted and sensitive at hand. To what end must man go to discover the depths of his ecstasy? Think hard strong warriors.
Fabious ****, I know this. I've got it! You want us to twist what is long with our sensitive hands.
He wants us to jerk him off.
If I may be so bold Your Highness, what is the meaning of that ribbon that you hold?
Fabious This? It's a gift from Belladonna, a symbol of her virgin purity. I hold it and savor it.
You do that instead of having sex with her?
Fabious Belladonna isn't like any maiden in the Kingdom. She behaves without judgement, defies expectation. When I first heard her voice a tear came to my eye and that tear turned to ice and I kept that frozen tear far from my heart that burns with passion. If she had a wound, I would kiss it. If she had a splinter, I would pull it from her flesh with my lips.
Just say, we are too late and Leezar has had his way with her, would you still be able to be with her?
Fabious I don't want to think about that.
But just say that we were moments late and he was able to...get her cookies.
Fabious Shut up.
Yes, I know. But what if he butt **** her? Would you still like her?
Fabious Do I have to write you a poem? There has never been a love so true as ours.
That's pure love.
Fabious Yes, it is.
No, that's pure love. There's a naked woman standing behind you.
Fabious I've been bitten, I can't move my leg. You've got to suck out the venom.
I don't want to suck it. You suck it.
Fabious I can't suck my own venom.
Yes you can. I'll help you. Suck it, suck your venom.
Fabious I can't reach it with my mouth.
Courtney, suck the venom.
I've never sucked veno-
It's coming, it's coming.
Courtney, spit the load.
Fabious Excuse my brother, he's not familiar with the customs of the road.
Do not touch me. Why are you making me look bad?
Fabious [catches Thadeous watching Isabel as she gets undressed to go for a swim in the pond]
What you doing, brother?
What right do you have scaring a man like that?!
Fabious What right have you to spy on a bathing woman from these shrubs?
I'm simply keeping an eye on her. She is not like one of our dimwitted chamber maids that let me take them from behind. This one has me vexed. What exactly would it take for one to tame such an adventurous slut?
Fabious Well, I imagine she'd want a man to be honorable, bold, brave. Know his way round a blade. [Isabel looks over her shoulder straight towards Fabious and Thadeous]
Oh, God! She's looking at us! Remain perfectly still. [Fabious and Thadeous freeze in their positions. Isabel ignores them, dives into the water and swims]
Fabious Without that sword, how do we defeat Leeza?
Maybe we can find some other way, with nets or something?
Fabious Nets?! Oh, that's a great plan. And meanwhile, Belladonna is going to get raped and die.
We don't know for sure if she'll die.
I shouldn't even be here! I will probably die on this quest, Courtney definitely will!
Fabious **** Courtney. And **** you. Maybe they're right, everything they say about you.
They only say that stuff because of you, because you go out and have to pretend to be the best, and they look at me like I'm some sort of idiot. Everyone in the kingdom wants to suck your dick, no one wants to suck mine!
