A character in Wet Hot American Summer (2001)

Gary quotes from Wet Hot American Summer (2001)

A.D. Miles

Tied for 6th most-quoted character in Wet Hot American Summer (2001): in 4 of its 33 quotes
Most scenes with: Caped Boy (4), Gene (2)

Scenes with Gary

4 scenes

...I've seen more **** up shit out there in five minutes than you've seen in your whole life.

Gary

Well, I'm sorry Gene, and if I could change history I would, but-

**** you! Now we need fifteen gallons of bug juice by snack time, do you know where the powder packets are?

Gary

Yeah.

In the pantry above the sink, right next to my bottle of dick cream, Wait... Forget that last comment.

Gary

Did you say dick cream?

No! I said ... stick... team, you know stick team! Stickball! Go away leave me alone!

Now finish up them taters, I'm gonna go fondle my sweaters.

Gary

Come on - what?

Finish up the taters.

Gary

And then what did you say?

And then what did I say?

Gary

You said you were going to... fondle your sweaters.

Ah, uh - no I didn't. I said fondue with cheddar, I was thinking about making fondue with cheddar cheese for dinner tonight.

Gary

No Gene, that is not what you said.

That is what I said. Fondue with cheddar.

J.J.

He gets so uncomfortable whenever we talk openly about sexual issues. You know he's never been with a girl before.

Gary

McKinley needs to experience "The Ultimate" And I think you know what I'm talking about.

J.J.

You mean, penis-in-vagina?

Gary

No, dickhead. Sex.

You guys, I'm really gonna miss this place.

Me, too.

Ben

Hey, let's all promise that in ten years from today, we'll meet again, and we'll see what kind of people we've blossomed into.

Yeah!

Ben

What time do you wanna meet?

J.J.

You mean ten years from now?

Ben

Yeah.

Let's meet in the morning so we can make a day of it.

Okay, so what is it? Is it like 9:00 or 9:30?

Well, let's say 9:00, that way we can be here by 9:30.

Well, no, why don't we say 9:30, and then make it your beeswax to be here at 9:30? I mean, we're all gonna be in our late 20s by then. I just don't see any reason why we can't be places on time.

Gary

Okay, then, it's settled. 9:30 it is. All agreed?

Together

Agreed.

Great, 'cause I have something at 11:00.

Gary

You've just got like a trapper-keeper full of appointments, right?

No, I just, I have something at 11:00, and I can't change it, because I already moved it twice.

Other characters in Wet Hot American Summer

More A.D. Miles characters