RL Reverend Lovejoy
Let the Lord's light shine upon you. Feel the spirit. Let it out!
G Grandpa
[Grandpa, who has just had the Lord's light shine upon him, suddenly goes into a possessed frenzy.]
HORRIBLE! HORRIBLE THINGS ARE GOING TO HAPPEEEEEEEN! [pointing at random people] And they're gonna happen to you, and you, and you, [points at Marge] and you! Whoa, Nelly!
G Grandpa
[He falls to the floor, whimpering and babbling. Comic Book Guy records him on his cell phone.]
People of Springfield, heed this warning: Twisted tail! A thousand eyes! TRAPPED FOREVER!
[Grandpa walks in a circle on the floor, making turkey-like gobbling noises.]
Dad, do something!
[frantically flicking through the Bible]
This book doesn't have any answers!
G Grandpa
Beware! Beware! Time is short! Epa! Epa! EEEEEEEEPAAAAAAAA!!! Believe me! BELIEVE ME!
G Grandpa
[Homer rolls him up in the aisle rug and drags him out of the church.] [babbles again briefly]
Thanks for listening!
[After Grandpa's experience, the family drive home (Grandpa is still wrapped up in the rug)]
Okay, who wants waffles?
BL Bart, Lisa and Grandpa
I do, I do, I do--!
Wait a minute, what about Grampa?
[ignoring Marge]
I want syrup!
[also ignoring Marge]
I want strawberries!
Something happened to that man--
I'll tell you what happened: A certain someone had a senior moment. But that's okay because we love him, and we got a free rug out of it! [kisses Grandpa on the forehead]
What is the point of going to church every Sunday, when if someone we love has a genuine religious experience, we ignore it?! Right, Grandpa?
G Grandpa
[Pause] [to Homer]
I want bananas on my waffles!
[The Simpsons arrive for breakfast]
I'm not dropping this.
G Grandpa
[Marge exits the car. The rest of the family follow after her, except for Grandpa]
Wait a minute! I'm still in the car!
Oh, right.
[Homer returns, rolls down the window, shuts the door, and leaves again]
GO Grandpa (on video)
[Marge watches the video of Grandpa on Comic Book Guy's phone.]
Twisted tail! A thousand eyes! TRAPPED FOREVER! Epa! Epa!
"Epa"? What could that be?
CB Comic Book Guy
I believe that's the sound that the Green Lantern made when Sinestro threw him into a vat of acid: "EEEEEEEEPAAH!"
[Slight pause]
... Uhh... yeah. Thanks for coming over.
CB Comic Book Guy
Thanks for giving me your pregnancy pants. Never known comfort like this!
[Marge and Grandpa are discussing his prophecy while Maggie is playing a "Baby Blast" game on a handheld which she confiscated from Bart in church.] [discussing Grandpa's prophecy with him]
"A thousand eyes." What could that be?
G Grandpa
Hmm... I'm pretty sure a thousand... is a number...
[Homer pokes his head in]
Hey, Marge! Isn't it great being married to somebody who's recklessly impulsive?
Actually, it's aged me horribly.
Then say hello to the newest Simpson!
[He comes in, carrying the pig (now named "Plopper"). Marge notices his twisted tail, and with shock remembers that part of Grandpa's prophecy.]
Homer... I believe that Grandpa's prophecy warned us about precisely this! Please get rid of that pig!
[not worried]
Aw, you're gonna love him! Look, he does an impression of you...
[Homer pulls Plopper's tail, causing him to scream and then do a deep-throated growl similar to Marge's trademark groan] [s****]
You nailed her! He also does me...
[He squeezes Plopper, causing him to belch. Marge laughs.]
You smiled, I'm off the hook!
Homer, you have to go out there, face that mob, and apologize for what you did.
I would, but I'm afraid that if I open the door, they'll take all of you.
[offscreen]
No we won't. We just want Homer!
Well maybe not you... but they'll kill Grandpa!
G Grandpa
[offscreen]
I'm part of the mob!
