N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z #

View Quote [Chuck notices Lem in a depressed state] Chuck: Hey, kid, what's bugging you?
Lem: Neera.
Chuck: What is that, an alien hernia?
Lem: Well, sort of. She's the girl of my dreams, and now, she hates me.
Chuck: Whoa, hate's a strong word. You mean to say, she just... dislikes you.
Lem: Plus, there's another guy - Glar!
Chuck: Okay, you know your problem? It's not Glar, or Neera. It's Lem. Look at you. You're so "left-brain", or is it "right-brain"? Whatever. You're the chief of control. You gotta loosen up. [checks his timer] We got a little time. You, my friend, are in luck. [cracking his knuckles] The doctor is in.
View Quote [Chuck puts a record on a record player] Chuck: Before we begin, I have a technical question. Are you considered very... ugly on this planet?
Lem: What?
Chuck: Because I can't tell.
Lem: No. I mean... I'm... okay.
Chuck: Oh, g-- Good, good.
View Quote [Discovering Base 9] This is amazing! I was right again! Woo-hoo!!
View Quote [During a show at the Planetarium] Space... a universe of mystery. Well, today, the mystery will be unveiled. Thanks to science, we know the universe is nearly 500 miles long, and it contains—you're not going to believe this—over 1,000 stars.
View Quote [Enters Lem's room] I saw the alien last night. I am so in. I got this guy wrapped around my little finger. Let me tell you, this alien's not so scary. [Sees Chuck] AAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!
View Quote [General Grawl and the Captain are looking for Chuck in a crowded street] Captain: All these costumes, Sir. How do we find the alien?
Grawl Simple Captain. Like us, the alien is in uniform. [Sees Chuck's United States Flag insignia]
View Quote [Giving advice on love] Why do chicks dig me? Because I'm handsome? Because I'm an astronaut? Yes and yes. But, it's also because of Chuck Baker's three steps to romance: Spot your prey. Make your move. Show no mercy. [suavely] Hey, baby. I saw you across the bar. Are sparks flying or is this place on fire.
View Quote [In a room with elderly women holding a tea party; to Lem] Let the doctor handle this. [Clears throat] Ladies, who wants to meet an astronaut? [Ladies throws cups at him] Ladies, one at a time! I'm on Facebook.
View Quote [Interrogating Rover] Where's your MASTER?! TALK!! [Rover leaks oil out]
View Quote [Investigating Chuck's head] What a remarkable brain you must have. An incision here and here, it should pop right out!
View Quote [Last line] You're a great planet and you're 50s are fine, but gimme a call when you get to the 60s… 'cause that's gonna be fun!
View Quote [Lem and Chuck are brought on stage for a costume contest] Lem: What are we supposed to do?
Chuck: [Pulls out his cellphone] Give them their daily minimum dose of "Chuck." [Walks forward to the crowd] HELLO, HUMANIACS!!
View Quote [Lem and Chuck watches an Army convoy taking Chuck's ship to a secret location] Chuck: Oh, look. That is great. Perfect. [Checks his timer, which has less than 20 hours left] Oh, JUST GREAT! PERFECT! John Glenn goes around the world, he's a senator for life! I went across the FRICKIN' UNIVERSE! I should be governor! Minimum, but no… I'm marooned here on this STUPID ROCK!! [Bursts into the Planetarium]
Lem: [Marches after him; angrily] Uh, this stupid rock is my home, or it was until you came along and ruined everything! I WANT MY LIFE BACK!! Unless, I don't know, maybe, there's something else you want to ruin!
Chuck: [points] Who's that?
Lem: [Looks at where Chuck is pointing and sees his boss staring at Chuck, shocked; sighs] My boss.
View Quote [Lem gets in the hot -wired car and notices that Skiff and Neera are in with him] Lem: You're going with me?
Neera: Uh-huh.
[Eckle pops his head out as Lem looks at him and Skiff] Lem: All right!
View Quote [Repeated line] Diabolical!