One Hundred and One Dalmatians (1961) · 46 quotes
Tied for 10th most-quoted character in One Hundred and One Dalmatians (1961): in 4 of its 46 quotes
Most scenes with: Sergeant Tibbs (3), Jasper Badun (2), Horace (2)
Um, ah, that's 15, sir.
15? Of course 15!
Captain Puddles, sir?
15 spotted puddles stolen, oh, balderdash!
Better double-check it, Colonel.
Hmm? Oh, yes, yes, I suppose I better.
Two woofs, one yip and a woof.
It sounds like puppies, sir.
Of course, puppies!
Towser, what's going on? What is it? What's all the gossip?
Taint no gossip, Lucy. It be all the way from London.
You don't say!
15 puppies stolen.
But there's no puppies around here. Not since Nellie's last litter. And they're all grown up.
Well, then, we'd best send the word along. It be up to me to reach the Colonel! He be the only one in barking range.
You'll never reach him at this hour!
Well, I can try! I'll bark all night if I have to. Ahem! [barks loudly, reaching an old farm establishment, where a gate with a sign above reads "Lancers: H.M. Forces Ret.: Maj. General S.F. Smedley: The 9th Queen's Royal Lancers". A grey farm horse named Captain opens the stall door]
Captain Hmm-hmm-hmm. Hmm... sounds like old Towser. It's an alert. Sergeant! [peaks louder to wake up Sergeant Tibbs, a tabby cat sleeping on his back] Sergeant Tibbs! I SAY, SERGEANT! [neighs loudly to wake up Tibbs]
Captain Barking signal. It's an alert. Report to the Colonel at once.
Yes, sir. Righto, sir. Right away, sir! [hops off Captain's back and scurries along the barn rafters to find Colonel. He reaches an empty barn stall with plenty of hay scattered on the floor and looks for Colonel] Colonel? I say, Colonel! Colonel, sir? Colonel? [yelps as Colonel wakes up] Colonel?!
What? What? Who goes there?
Sergeant Tibbs reporting, sir.
Tibbs? Tibbs? Oh, yes, Sergeant Tibbs!
Colonel, sir-
Now, look here, Tibbs. What's the idea of barging in at this hour of the night?
But, Colonel...
Hold on, Sergeant. You hear that? Sounds like an alert.
Yes, Colonel.
Well, we'd better look into it. Come along, on the double!
Yes, sir. Righto, sir. [follows Colonel to the stall next to Captain's stall, just as Captain himself hears the last of the message]
Captain It's old Towser down at Withermarsh, sir.
By Jove, yes! So it is. Well, I'll see what he wants. Ahem! [barking]
It'd be the Colonel. The old boy himself! [chuckles] He wants the message.
You'd better make it loud and clear or he'll never get it.
One long howl, two short. One yip and a woof.
Two yips, sir.
Captain What's the word, Colonel?
It's from London.
It must be important.
The Colonel: Yes, I'll get the rest of it. Ahem! [barks some more]
Um, ah, that's 15, sir.
15? Of course 15! [more barking] Yes, dot, spot, spot, spotted puddings...poodles...No, no, puddles.
The Captain Puddles, sir?
15 spotted puddles stolen, oh, balderdash!
Better double-check it, Colonel.
Hmm? Oh, yes, yes, I suppose I better. [barks, then barking in the distance in response] Two woofs, one yip and a woof.
It sounds like puppies, sir.
Of course, puppies!
Colonel, Colonel, sir, I just remembered. Two nights past, I heard puppy barking at Hell Hall.
You mean the old De Vil place? Nonsense, Tibbs! No one's lived there for years.
Captain Hold on! There's smoke coming from the chimney!
By Jove, that's strange... strange indeed. I suppose we'd better investigate. I'll send word for ol' Towser to stand by. [barking]
Please... stand... by.
What's he mean by that?
I don't know. Oh... maybe the ol' boy's found something!
Oh, I do hope so!
Captain Any news, Colonel?
Not a blasted thing. They're lost or captured, or something, or other. Who knows what.
Colonel, sir, Colonel! Here she comes a car.
Oh, come now, Tibs. Don't be ridiculous. They wouldn't be driving.
Yes, I know, sir. But it's heading for Hell Hall. It... It's stopping at the gate!
It is? Blast it all, Tibbs! Better see what's up. On the double, man. On the double!
Yes, sir. [jumps on Colonel's back as they head for the de Vil mansion]
Take over, Captain!
Captain Righto, sir.
I'm sorry, Mr. Simpkins. The answer is no. No, no, no, no. Six down, four to go.
Ah, was this a single item or a number of things?
It must be a yes or no question, Inspector.
I've got no time to argue. I tell you it's got to be done tonight. [turns off the TV] Do you understand?! Tonight!
But they ain't big enough.
You couldn't get half a dozen coats out of the whole kaboodle.
Then we'll settle for half a dozen! We can't wait! The police are everywhere. I want the job done tonight!
How are we gonna do it?
Any way you like. Poison them, drown them, bash them in the head! You got any chloroform?
Not a drop.
And no ether...either.
I don't care how you kill the little beasts, but DO IT! AND DO IT NOW!
Aw, please, miss. Now have pity, will ya? Can't we see the rest of the show first?
We want to see "What's My Crime?"
Now listen, you idiots! I'll be back first thing in the morning! And the job better be done and I'll... I'll... I'll call the police!
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!! [She slams the door closes behind her in a fit of rage; the slam causes a chunk of the ceiling to come loose and fall on Horace's head]
I think she means it, Jasper.
Ah...we'll get on with it as soon as the show's over. [turns the TV back on]
Will you please sign in, sir?
Hey, kids. You'd better get out of here if you want to save your skins.
But, how?
Shh. There's a hole in the wall there by the door. [points to the hole in the wall right by the door] C'mon, shake a leg. Psst. Kids, follow me.
Yeah, what do you know: Old Meathead Fauncewater!
C'mon, now. Don't crowd. One at a time! One at a time!
Now, for our last contestant this evening, panel, meet Mr. Percival Fauncewater. Now, Mr. Fauncewater, if the panel fails to guess your unusual crime in ten questions, you will receive two weeks vacation at a fashionable seaside resort, all expenses paid. That is, of course, after you've paid your debt to society.
Now, um, who will take the first question? Inspector?
Ah, Mr. Fauncewater, could your crime be classified as larceny? A theft, you know? A burglary of some sort?
Straighten out! Form a queue along the wall. C'mon, snap it up. Faster!
Mr. Fauncewater is a burglar by trade, but in this case, his crime was not burglary. I'm sorry: The answer is no. One down, nine to go. Miss Birdwell?
If your crime wasn't robbery, wherein did you... Oh, dear, what I mean is... Do something of a violent nature, that it is..
Oh, come, come, come, Miss Birdwell, we're running short of time.
Oh, yes, of course. So sorry. Did you do someone in?
Oh, blimey! [sees Lucky watching the game show with interest]
Oh, no, Miss Birdwell, I'm sorry. The answer is no. Two down, eight to go. Mr. Simpkins?
Oh, yes. Your crime was not robbery and not homicide. Well then, could it be a violation of a city ordinance of some sort?
Psst. Hey, kid, let's go. [tries grabbing Lucky's tail, but Lucky leans up to get a closer view of the screen, where Mr. Fauncewater whispers something into the Host's ear]
I see. Uh, uh, no. The answer is no, no, no.
Hey, get out of the way, you little runt! [roughly hands Lucky to Jasper who angrily tosses him aside]
Three down, seven to go. Inspector?
Oh, this is very confusing, I must say, strictly. Surely, this crime could...
I'm terribly sorry. I'm afraid we've run out of time.
Would it be possible for Mr. Fauncewater to come back next week? Then, we could finish our little game. Goodnight, audience. See you next week at the same time on "What's My Crime?"
Oh, well. C'mon, Horace. Let's get on with it. [evilly grabs a fire poker] I'll pop 'em off, you do the skinnin'.
Oh, no, you don't, Jasper! [evilly pulls off a chair leg and uses it as a club] I'll pop 'em off and you do the skinnin'.
Hey, Horace, look! They're gone! They flew the coop, right out through this little hole. [pulls out a flashlight] Here, grab a torch. We'll run 'em down before you can say "Bob's your uncle".
There they go, Horace, up the stairs. [creepily calls for Rolly's attention] Here, puppies. Here, puppies! C'mon. Now, don't go hiding from your ol' Uncle Jasper. Aw, I ain't gonna hurt ya.
But, I thought we was gonna pop 'em off.
Shut up. Now, take a squint in there, and I'll check these other two rooms.
Here, puppies. Puppies, come on out. Come out wherever you are. [looks under the bed and is startled by Sgt. Tibbs]
Horace! [gets plowed over by the puppies] Oh! It's that mangy tabby cat! He's the ringleader! Head 'em off, Horace! Head 'em...
You bungling blockhead! [angrily punches Horace on the head]
Back here! Back here! Shh. Here they come.
Double-crossin' little twerps, pullin 'a snitch on us, and after we took care of 'em all this time. There's gratitude for you.
It ain't fair, Jasper.
Naw.
Sergeant? I say, Sergeant.
Shut that door, Horace! We'll close in on 'em. Enough of this "Ring Around the Rosy".
Dad! Mother!
"I missed you, Mummy."
"Here we are, Mummy."
How'd you find us, Dad?
Oh, Daddy!
And Rolly, you little rascal!
"Did you bring me anything to eat?"
Everybody here? All 15?
Twice that many, Dad. Now there's 99 of us!
"What? 99...?" [sees the 84 extra dalmatian puppies sitting on the hay bales] Where did they all come from?
She's gonna make coats out of us.
She couldn't!
Horace and Jasper were gonna pop us off and... skin us!
"She's a devil, a witch! What'll we do?"
We have to get back to London somehow.
What about the others? What'll they do?
"Perdy, we'll take them home with us; all of them. Our pets would never turn them out."
Captain Colonel, sir, lights on the road. It's a truck headin' this way. [sees the Baduns driving their truck down the road as their follow their tracks]
It's the Baduns, Horace and Jasper. They're following our tracks.
"Well, we've got 'em out numbered, Tibs. When I give the signal, we'll attack.
"Colonel, sir, I'm afraid that would be disastrous."
"Ahem! Oh, you think so?"
He's right, Colonel. We'd better run for it.
Out the back way, across the pasture.
Thank you, Sergeant, Colonel, Captain.
Bless you all.
How can we ever repay you?
Ahem! Nothing at all. All in the line of duty.
That's right, sir... routine.
Captain Better be off. Here they come.
C'mon, kids, hurry. [leads the puppies out the barn and across the pasture]
"Good luck, Pongos.
Yes, good luck, and never fear! We'll hold them off 'til the bitter end!
Captain Now, what's this? Hey, out of my way, you barkin' haystack, or I'll knock your blinkin' block off!
Well, they ain't in here, Jasper.
No. They're hiding in the hay. Here, give me a match. We'll burn 'em out.
Ready, Captain. Aim... Fire one! [pulls down Captain's ear, letting him kick Jasper in the butt and into the barn roof, surprising Colonel] Fire two! [fires Captain's leg, kicking Horace in the butt and right into the barn roof where Jasper is]
Hey! There they go, the little sneaks! C'mon, Horace, back to the truck. We'll head 'em off in half a mile. [rush back outside, where Jasper rides up in the truck and lets his brother get on, drive down the country road and stop at a bridge, where they shine their flashlights on a frozen creek] Ah, they gotta be around here somewhere.
Jasper, I've been thinkin'.
Now, Horace.
Well, what if they went down the froze-up creek so's not to leave their tracks?
Aw, Horace, you idiot! Dogs ain't that smart. [starts up the truck and drives off into the distance]
We gave 'em the slip! [slips on the ice in front of Pongo] Didn't we, Dad?
They didn't even see us, Patch!
Shh, children. Children, shh.
My feet are slippery. I wish we could walk on the snow.
No, son, we can't leave tracks. [follows the dalmatians behind with Lucky in his teeth. His hind legs slip on the ice, then he stands back up and resumes following them]
Pongo
Rod Taylor
Cruella De Vil
Betty Lou Gerson
Jasper Badun
Perdita
Anita Radcliffe
Jasper
J. Pat O'Malley
Horace
Frederick Worlock
Sergeant Tibbs
David Frankham
The Colonel
J. Pat O'Malley
Anita
Lisa Davis
Cadpig
Freckles
Mary Wickes
Lucky
Mimi Gibson
Patch
Mickey Maga
Penny
Sandra Abbott
Roger
Rolly
Barbara Beaird
Pepper
