Dina Now Greg, you have a very unique last name and Jack and I were wondering how to pronounce it?
Oh, just like its spelled. F-O-C-K-E-R.
Dina F-Focker.
Hmm, Focker.
Played by Blythe Danner 
Meet the Parents (2000) · 44 quotes
Meet the Parents (2000) · 44 quotes
4th most-quoted character in Meet the Parents (2000): in 11 of its 44 quotes
Most scenes with: Jack Byrnes (11), Pam Byrnes (11), Gaylord 'Greg' Focker (8)
Scenes with Dina
11 scenes Dina Dina Pam, I didn't know you had a cat.
Yeah, I left him here when I moved to Chicago.
Dina Your daddy's found his new best friend. You won't believe it. He even taught him to use the potty.
He did? Dad, that's kinda weird, isn't it?
What's so weird about it? Now we don't have to smell kitty litter all the time. That's right.
That's incredible. How did you teach the cat to use the toilet?
Oh, that was easy, Greg. I just designed a litter box to put inside the toilet, and then once he got used to it, I took it away.
Yeah, makes sense.
Dina But I don't think he likes it. I mean, every chance he gets, he tries to dig, squat and bury. I had to move all my potted plants off the floor.
Plus, you got another guy around the house to leave the seat up.
[The family stares at him blankly.]
He can't lift the seat, Greg. He lacks the strength and the opposable thumbs. Yeah.
Jinx is strictly a house cat. Can't let him outside because he lacks outdoor survival skills.
Okay.
I don't think Greg will be playing with Jinxy too much. He hates cats.
[Chuckles nervously]
Pam, I don't hate cats. I don't-- I don't hate cats. I just happen to be more of a dog lover. Yeah, yeah.
Dina [Mouthing]
I am too.
Well, that's okay if you hate cats, Greg.
No! I don't. I don't hate cats at all.
That's okay. Just be honest about it. There's some things I hate.
I-- I'm being honest. Really? Like what?
So, uh, Greg, how's your job?
Um, good, Pam. Thanks for asking. I, uh, I recently got transferred to triage.
Dina Oh, is that better than a nurse?
No, Mom, triage is a unit of the E.R. It's where all the top nurses work.
Well--
No, they do.
Not many men in your profession, though, are there, Greg?
No, Jack, not traditionally.
Mm-hmm.
Greg, would you like to say grace?
Oh, uh, well, Greg's Jewish, Dad. You know that.
You're telling me Jews don't pray, honey? [to Greg] Unless you have some objection.
No, no, no, no, I'd love to. Pam, come on, it's not like I'm a rabbi or something. I've said grace at many a dinner table.
Okay.
O dear God, thank You. You are such a good God to us, a kind and gentle...and accommodating God. And we thank You, O sweet, sweet Lord of hosts...for the...smorgasbord...You have so aptly lain at our table this day...and each day...by day. Day by day by day. O dear Lord, three things we pray. To love Thee more dearly, to see Thee more clearly, to follow Thee more nearly...day by day...by day. Amen. Amen.
Dina Oh, Greg, that was lovely.
Thank you, Greg. That was interesting too.
Dina Oh, honey, why don't you read Greg your poem?
Oh, no, he doesn't want to hear that.
What? No! What-What-What poem?
Dina You see, when Jack had to retire...for health reasons...
That's a bunch of malarky. Honey, I'm fine.
Dina The doctor thought it would be therapeutic if he...sort of expressed his emotions in an artistic way. Honey, you wrote the most beautiful poem about your mother.
Please, we really wanna hear it.
Poem, poem. Please!
Oh, all right. It's a work in progress. I'm still not happy with it. As soon as it's ready, then I am going to glaze it onto a plate...and put it next to the urn.
Nice.
Dina It's very special.
"My Mother" by Jack Byrnes. You gave me life, you gave me milk, you gave me courage. Your name was Angela, the angel from heaven, but you were also an angel of God, and He needed you too. Selfishly I tried to keep you here...while the cancer ate away your organs...like an unstoppable rebel force. But I couldn't save you, and I shall see your face...nevermore, nevermore, nevermore, until we meet...in heaven.
Daddy, that's beautiful.
Dina It always gets me.
Amazing. So-So--So much love, yet also so much information.
You must've had vegetables fresher than that, growing up on a farm, Greg.
Dad, uh, Greg grew up in Detroit.
He told me he grew up on a farm.
Dina Do they have many farms in Detroit?
No, Dina, no, not a lot. In fact, Jack, I should clarify this. I didn't actually grow up... on a farm per se. The house we grew up in was originally erected...in the early Dutch farm, colonial style. So that, plus we had a lot of pets--
Which one did you milk then?
Dad!
Honey, he said he pumped milk. What have you ever milked?
A cat.
A cat?
I milked a cat once. You wanna hear a story?
Sure.
My sister had a cat, and the cat birthed a litter of kittens. Must've been 8 of them, and there was this one little runt... this little sweet little... little-engine-that-could runt... who wanted to get up there and couldn't really get access to the-- to the-- to the-- to the-- to the teat.
Teat?
Dad.
What have you. I went in and just simply, you know, just-- into a little saucer, then took the saucer and fed it to Geppetto-- that's what I named him.
Dina I had-- I had no idea you could milk a cat.
Oh, yeah, you can milk anything with nipples.
I have nipples, Greg. Could you milk me?
Oh, geez, I just realized something.
Dina What?
Pam's middle name.
Dina [unconcerned]
Martha. [realizing] Oh, no.
Jack and Dina Pamela Martha Focker.
Your dad has totally turned you against me.
I didn't turn her against you. You did that to yourself.
Jack, please. You didn't like me from the second I walked in here.
I'm a very accepting person, Focker. All I ask for is honesty.
Oh, honesty? You wanna talk about truth and honesty, Jack? Okay, let's talk a little truth and honesty. Let's talk a little "Operation Ko Samui," Jack.
What's he talking about, Dad?
Yeah, that's weird, 'cause I thought there weren't any secrets...inside the circle of trust, Jack.
I don't know what you're talking about.
You don't? Huh? What's the matter? Cat got your tongue? Hey, Pam, guess what. Daddy's planning a little covert operation in Thailand for the day after the wedding.
You are?
Round and round we go, Jack. Hey. I bet everybody would love to hear about your rendezvous...in the parking lot of the Oyster Bay Drug and Sundry. You know what I'm talking about. Where the guy gave you the passports and the documents. Or how about your little phone call in Thai?
Dina Jack can't talk Thai.
Oh, no, Dina. Jack can talk Thai. Jack talk Thai very well. I'm sorry, Pam, but your dad is not retired. He's still very much in the C.I.A.
I love you Dad, but you could be a real jerk sometimes. [storms out of room]
Dina Well who is, Jack? No one has ever been good enough for your Pam. You only warmed up to Kevin after she broke up with him.
Just gotta do one more thing.
Dina What's that?
Meet his parents.
Dina Jack--
Honey, relax. I'm sure they're wonderful.
Dina Good night, Jack.
[They turn out their lights.]
I mean, they'd have to be, right? To name their son Gaylord Focker.
