Mean Girls quotes

View Quote Cady: Hey!... Are we still in a fight?
Janis: Are you still an asshole?
Cady: No. I don't think so.

View Quote [voiceover] I know it may look like I had become a bitch, but that's only because I was acting like a bitch.

View Quote [reading a printed page from the Burn Book]
Damian: Janis Ian - ****.
Janis: Oh, that's original.
[reading about himself]
Damian: "Too gay to function?!"
Janis: Hey, that's only okay when I say it!

View Quote [voiceover] In Girl World, Halloween is the one night a year when girls can dress like a total slut and no other girls can say anything about it.

View Quote Cady: [voiceover] Finally, Girl World was at peace.
Damian: Hey, check it out. Junior Plastics.
Cady: [voiceover] And if any freshmen tried to disturb that peace, well, let's just say we knew how to take care of it.
[Imagines Junior Plastics being hit by a bus]
Cady: [voiceover] Just kidding.

View Quote Cady: [describing Regina] She's not even that good looking if you really look at her.
Janis: I don't know, now that she's getting fatter she's got pretty big jugs.

View Quote Shane Oman: Why are you eating a Kälteen bar?
Regina: I'm starving.
Shane Oman: Man, I hate those things. Coach Carr makes us eat those when we want to move up a weight class.
Regina: What?
Shane Oman: They make you gain weight like crazy.
Regina: Motherf - [spits out candy bar and screams]

View Quote Gretchen: That is so fetch!
Regina: Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen! It's not going to happen!

View Quote Dawn Schweitzer: [reading pages from burn book] "Dawn Schweitzer has a huge ass." Who would write that?
Other Jock Girl: Who wouldn't write that?

View Quote Kevin Gnapoor: [rapping] Yo Yo Yo! All you sucka MCs ain't got nothin' on me! From my grades to my life you can't touch Kevin G! I'm a mathlete, so nerd is inferred, but forget what you heard I'm like James Bond the third, sh-sh-sh-shaken not stirred - I'm Kevin Gnapoor! The G's silent when I sneak through your door and make love to your woman on the bathroom floor. I don't play it like Shaggy, you'll know it was me. Cause the next time you see her she'll be like, "OHH! KEVIN G!"
[cut off]
Mr. Duvall: Thank you Kevin, that's enough!
Kevin Gnapoor: Happy holidays everybody!

View Quote [Talking about Regina George] She's a life ruiner. She ruins people's lives.

View Quote [trying to avoid plans with Regina]
Karen: I can't go out.
[faux coughs softly]
Karen: I'm sick.
Regina: Boo, you whore.

View Quote This is Damian. He's almost too gay to function.

View Quote Karen: [after being dumped by Aaron, Regina is crying and holding hands with Gretchen and Karen in her bedroom] Did he say why?
Regina: [sniffling] Somebody told him about Shane Oman.
Gretchen: Who?
Regina: He said some guy on the baseball team.
Karen: Baseball team?
Regina: I gave him EVERYTHING. I was half a virgin when I met him!
Karen: You want to do something fun?
[looks enlightened]
Karen: You want to go to Taco Bell?
Regina: I CAN'T GO TO TACO BELL, I'M ON AN ALL-CARB DIET. God, Karen, you are SO stupid!
[stomps off]

View Quote Happy Hour is from four to six!