A character in Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius (2001)

Carl Wheezer quotes from Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius (2001)

Rob Paulsen

2nd most-quoted character in Jimmy Neutron: Boy Genius (2001): in 7 of its 15 quotes
Most scenes with: Jimmy Neutron (6), Sheen Estevez (6), Cindy Vortex (4)

Scenes with Carl Wheezer

7 scenes
[he's up for show and tell at school]

This is Ultra Lord! [The class groans]

Ms. Winifred Fowl

Sheen, this is the seventh week in a row you've shown Ultra Lord in class.

Ms. Fowl, this one is different. This "Purple Vengeance" edition with power fists and nuclear knees is in rare, never-before-seen condition, making it highly collectible!

"Never-before-seen", huh? Well, then, how do you know it's even in there?

Hmm... [takes Ultra Lord action figure out of the box and mockingly waves it in front] Nyah-nyah. [Cindy smug grin shakes her head and gives him a smirk; suddenly shocked, realizing what he has done] NO!

Carl Wheezer
[The class students starts laughing] [whispering]

Hey, Jimmy, wanna see a frog? [shows him a crude drawing of a smiling frog]

Oh, that looks great, Carl.

Carl Wheezer

Thanks. [notices Jimmy's more precise drawings] Um, what are you drawing?

Flycycle modifications for Goddard. Second prototype.

Carl Wheezer

"Prototype", huh?

Uh-huh.

Carl Wheezer

Well, you know, that looks good, too.

Thanks, Carl.

Carl Wheezer
[takes out inhaler]

This is my inhaler. It provides fast-acting relief of bronchial swelling due to asthma or allergies. One touch of the button and- [accidentally sprays into his eyes] AAH! OH! I CAN'T SEE!

[notices a poster for Retroland theme park]

Hey! Retroland theme park! Check it out! [takes poster off the pole] "Meet Ultra Lord! Live!"

Oh, look! [takes the poster from Sheen] It's the state of the arts bone-warping gravity rides!

[takes back the poster]

I could hang out with Ultra Lord!

Carl Wheezer
[takes poster]

And there's a petting zoo.

[takes poster]

But look at this!

[takes poster]

No! "Meet Ultra Lord live!"

Carl Wheezer
[takes poster]

Llamas and capybaras.

Who cares? "Meet Ultra Lord live!"

Carl Wheezer
[dances in excitement]

But I'm going to touch a llama!

Hugh
[In the living room, Jimmy hops down the stairs carrying his shrink ray]

Jimmy's a big boy now. Don't you worry, sugar.

I suppose you're right.

Hugh
[Jimmy accidentally drops his shrink ray, much to its weight, and it lands on the couch next to Hugh]

Yeah, sure. I was a kid once. I remembered being grounded for a whole week and not being allowed to go to my best friend's bachelor party. [picks up the shrink ray, mistaking it for a TV remote and shrinks the TV]

Well, what did you do?

Hugh

Well, actually, I snuck out. [enlarges the TV and shrinks Judy's head]

[high-pitched voice]

You don't think that Jimmy...

Hugh
[enlarges her head normal-sized again]

Oh, no, no. Besides, how's he gonna sneak out? It's not like he can just walk right out the front door.

That's true.:

Retroland, here I come. [Zoom in on Cindy's house. Cindy is wearing a karate outfit while holding a purple soda. Libby's cellphone rings]

Libby, you're breaking my concentration.

Hey, I gotta choose a ring that fits my personality. Yeah! Here we go! Here we go! Tell me what it is you're supposed to be doing again.

T'ai Chi, while drinking Purple Flurp. T'ai Chi promotes wellness, relaxes and rejuvenates the body. Whereas Purple Flurp, being 98% sugar, creates tension and a temporary rush of energy and mood swings. I figure if I do them together, I achieve perfect balance. Whoa! [Cindy laughs, Libby shook her head]

Carl Wheezer
[Parking lot]

Whoa. It's better than the poster.

Gentlemen, this will be a night we shan't easily forget.

I don't know what "shan't" means. But let's go!

Park Ultra Lord

Do you promise to use your powers for good and not evil?

Yes... yes, Ultra Lord!

Park Ultra Lord

Now, Counterpart, take this Ultra Mask and lead the fight for justice. [Sheen takes the Ultra Mask before fainting.] Is this kid with anyone?

Go, Carl!

Now that's what I call a ride. Let's go. This is way beyond awesome.

Just think if you boneheaded dweebs had listened to your parents, you'd be home in bed instead of riding this monster!

Alarm Clock

Liftoff in five, four, three, two... We have liftoff!

Abort mission. Abort mission. Goddard, wake mode. All right. Come on, boy. Race you to the kitchen. Beat ya. Hey, Mom, did you get any more Purple Flurp? Mom? [takes a note from the Neutron's fridge in the kitchen; reading] "Dear son/daughter..." [outside; reading] "We have gone to Florida for an extended vacation."

Carl Wheezer
[reads]

"Love, your parents."

Yeah. My parents went to Florida too.

That's weird. From the look of it... [seeing that all the kids are looking for their parents holding the same note] I'd say a lot of parents are gone.

Carl Wheezer

Did they all go to Florida?

Maybe they went to get juice or something?

Carl Wheezer

I don't digest pulp well. It makes me bloaty.

Goddard, scan for adult life-forms.

[Goddard does a scan of all of Retroville for adults]

Just as I thought; there are absolutely no adults anywhere within radar. They're gone. The whole city. No parents.

Carl Wheezer

No parents.

Hmmmm....

Jimmy Neutron, Carl Wheezer and Sheen Estevez
[the three of them gasp suddenly, realizing their wish came true]

NO PARENTS!

[They, followed by the other kids, run off, celebrating]

Excuse me. [The boy he is holding ice cream]

Amber

I'm letting out the cold!

I'm peeing in the shower!

Carl Wheezer

Llama, llama, llama!

Kevin
[Soon, all the kids ran to the mall. Nick and a few others activated the arcade machines] [Shopping Mall]

I'm walking up the down escalator. Ha Ha!

Lewis
[He singing and dancing. Clothing Store]

My clothes don't match! I'm out in public and my clothes don't match!

I'm still doin' it! [in a deep, Ultra-Lord-ish voice] Go, go, go!

Hostess
[A girl she named hostess. Ice cream shop]

Welcome to the Candy Bar. Whoopee cushion or non-whoopee cushion?

Britney Tenelli

What'll it be, boys?

Carl Wheezer

We'll have what he's throwing.

Britney Tenelli

Excellent choice.

[A boy named Adler. School]

Hang on! Wheeeǃ

Whoo.

Ms. Winifred Fowl

No skiing in the halls! Don't make me get the protractor.

Morning, Goddard. Oh, my head. What a night!

Carl Wheezer

Oh, I'm stuffed now. I-I couldn't have anoth-- Okay, one more. I'm gonna have one more, and then that'll be it.

[Sheen emerges from a large pile of popcorn]

What a battle. Are there any survivors? [falls back in the popcorn pile; his hand rises out; desperate] Help me.

I remember my first time. Shake it off, Neutron!

I gotta get home. Mom and Dad might be back by now. Come on, Goddard.

Oleander Svalsbord
[Jimmy sees a TV that says "KIDS SPECIAL REPORT." Wendall laughs and throws a piece of paper over. A boy named Oleander]

We interrupt this program to bring you this special report. [Wendall puts his hand on the camera and messes around with it] Hey, knock it off, Arnie! [clears throat] "Trouble in Paradise". [Wendall does the "peace" sign next to Oleander] That's what some kids are saying in the aftermath of yesterday's "Mom and Dad are gone" celebrations. [the cameraman moves the camera away from him; pops out] Here's Courtney Tyler. [chuckles]

Courtney Tyler

What started as an awesome day has become, like, a real bummer.

Johnny
[runs past]

Help us!

Nathan DeCarlo
[runs past]

I don't know how to make lunch!

Tina Sue
[offscreen]

I want my parents!

Johnny
[runs up to the camera]

Somebody hold me!

Nissa
[A little girl she named Nissa. Who is holding her hurt knee playground]

I-I was playing on the teeter-totter, and the next thing I knew, I was on the ground, and my knee...huuuurt!

Courtney Tyler
[clears throat]

Reports of tummy aches, owies and constipation have reached epidemic numbers over the past few hours, with little indication of slowing down. [A little boy named Zachary.]

Zachary Jones

And. And so we were gonna see who could eat the most cotton candy.[camera zooms out, revealing he's bloated] And I won! [cries] I want my Mommy! [He burps as his shirt rips]

OK, Ben, that's good. Let it down slow. Two more turns, Emma. Not too tight. Yup. Tape adhesion is within operational limits. What? Cindy? Cindy, what did you do to that intergalactic starship?

We thought that the deep recesses of space could use a feminine touch.

What do you think, Jimmy?

Yeah, it's OK, I guess. You kinda ruined it though.

Hey, Jimmy, do these fusion reactors need fuel rods?

Come on, Sheen. It's not rocket science. You just have to... Actually, I guess it is rocket science. No fuel rods, Sheen.

And for the final touch.[He rips the paper out revealing the neutron logo on his rocket. Cut to the kids gathered while Jimmy is on the stage] Good work, everybody. We're ready for intergalactic travel.

Neutron, this is gonna work, right?

Yeah, Jimmy. What if it doesn't work?

It will work! [almost falls off of the nail he's standing on] I'm 95% sure it will.

Yeah, and the other 5%?

[hesitantly]

We blow up. [The kids gasp, murmur] But just a little. Look, a 95 is still an 'A'.

Yeah, I can deal with that. I never got a 95 in my life.

You heard the man. Stop sucking your thumbs and let's light this candle! [The kids fasten his seatbelts and safety bars, Cindy and Libby put on their headphones as speakers. Sheen puts on his mask, and Carl uses his inhaler. Jimmy and Goddard are in their rocket ship.]

Goddard, initiate launch sequence.

Goddard Neutron

Please make sure seat belts are fastened and remember to keep your hands and arms inside the vehicles at all times. [Jimmy inserts the quarter. The rocket starts to fly. The "Bat Outa Heck" bat ride starts flying in the sky, as does the eyeballs from 'Eye Sky in the Sky'. Cindy and Libby's intergalactic starship starts to fly out, the boat ride swing ride starts spinning and flies out in the sky, the roller coaster rides down and flies out. Then, the Ferris wheel goes up and flies in the sky. The Octa-Puke ride starts spinning octopus and flies out. Then, the Flutter-By ride spins. Carl screams as the butterfly lets go, and races off like Crash Team Racing. Then, the other kids' camel & dragon rides started flying.]

Come on, everybody. Get in formation. Carl, you're too low.

Carl Wheezer

Come on, you stupid butterfly! [Carl's butterfly starts flying as well]

Go, Counterparts! Go!

Hang on. We're passing through the stratosphere. Now the mesosphere. Entering ionosphere.

Carl Wheezer

Now I know why they all end in "phere"!

This is it, baby. Engaging pulse rockets, now! [The rockets spaceships turned off and they off kids screams] Come on, come on, come on, come on. [The rockets spaceships flare up Earth orbit and everyone cheers.]

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