Indiana Jones Nice try, Lao Che!
2nd most-quoted character in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984): in 30 of its 66 quotes
Most scenes with: Willie Scott (16), Short Round (11), Mola Ram (5)
Nothing shocks me. I'm a scientist.
More lines from Indiana Jones
5 quotes Indiana Jones Indiana Jones [with shoe on fire]
Water! Water! Water! Wa... Oh. [sees a flood coming towards him] WATER!
Indiana Jones Mola Ram! Prepare to meet Kali... IN HELL!
Indiana Jones (as he and Short Round are whipped)
Leave him alone, you bastards!
Indiana Jones [Willie has the antidote to the poison that was in his martini]
Stay there!
Scenes with Indiana Jones
24 scenes
Aren't you going to introduce us?
This is Willie Scott. This is Indiana Jones, famous archaeologist.
Well, I always thought archaeologists were always funny little men searching for their mommies.
Indiana Jones Mummies.
Indiana Jones [Obi Wan Nightclub. Lao Che and his sons are sitting at the opposite end of a table from Indy, who has taken Willie hostage with a large fork. Lao Che offers some gold and silver coins to Indy on the table's turnstile, who rejects them.]
The diamond, Lao. The deal was for the diamond.
[Lao Che spins over a large diamond and a martini.] [tales the diamond out and stares at it in glee]
Oh, Lao...! [yelps as Indy jabs her with the fork, making her drop the diamond into his hand.]
Indy
To your very good health. [attempts to take a drink from the martini, Willie elbows him]
Lao, he put a hole-- he put two holes in my dress from Paris!
Indy
My pleasure. [beckons to his assistant, disguised as a waiter]
Who on earth is this "Nurhaci"?
Indy
Here he is.
Inside are the remains of Nurhaci - first Emperor of Manchu Dynasty!
Indiana Jones Welcome home, old boy.
[Indy sips his martini. Lao Che and his sons laugh diabolically.]
And now, you give me the diamond.
Indiana Jones [tugging at his collar as though in discomfort]
Are you trying to develop a sense of humor, or am I going deaf?
Antidote.
Indy
[Suddenly tense]
To what?
The poison you just drank, Dr. Jones! [continues to laugh]
Indiana Jones Short Round, step on it!
Okey-Dokey Dr. Jones! Hold on to your potatoes!
For cryin' out loud, there's a KID drivin' the car!
Indy
[Indy desperately reaches down Willie's cleavage for the antidote bottle]
Where's the antidote?!
Oh, listen, I just met you... Oh, I'm not that kind of girl!
Hey, Dr. Jones, no time for love! We got company!
[Indy finds the vial, shoves Willie away, and hurriedly swallows the antidote.]
Oh, I hope you choke!
Webber
Ah, Dr. Jones. I'm Earl Webber. I spoke with your assistant and managed to secure three seats, but there might be a slight inconvenience as you will be riding on a cargo full of live poultry.
Is he kidding?!
Earl
Madam, it's the best I could do on such short notice! [recognizes Willie] Heavens, aren't you Willie Scott, the famous American female vocalist?
Indiana Jones [Willie, Short Round, and Indy board airplane] [shakes hands with Webber]
I owe you a gin. [laughs as he spots Lao Che arrive too late to stop him] Nice try, Lao Che!
[Indiana slams plane door which says "LAO CHE AIR FREIGHT"]
Goodbye, Dr. Jones. [he and his lackey laugh malevolently]
Indiana Jones I'm allowing you to tag along so why don't you give your mouth a rest, okay doll?
What do you mean, "tag along"? Ever since you got into my club you haven't been able to take your eyes off me!
Indiana Jones Oh, yeah? [places his fedora over his eyes and falls asleep]
Pilot
[After dumping the plane's fuel, the pilot and co-pilot walk past the sleeping Willie, Short Round and Indy. However, the chickens are awake and make noises, jostling Willie, who sees the door is ajar.]
Goodbye!
[The pilots jump out wearing parachutes. Willie awakens, makes her way to the cockpit, and sees it is empty.]
Oh, no... oh, no... [to a sleeping Indy] Oh, Mister! Mister! Oh, Mister, wake up!
Okay! Dr. Jones? Dr. Jones, oh please wake up!
Indiana Jones [wakes]
Are we there already? Oh, good.
No!
Indiana Jones Huh?
Indiana Jones Oh, boy...
They've all gone! [Indy sits into the pilot's seat] You know how to fly, don't you?
Indiana Jones ...No. [hopefully] Do you?
Oh, my God... I'm gonna faint...
Indiana Jones How hard could it be?
What is Sankara?
Indiana Jones Fortune and glory, kid. Fortune and glory.
Indiana Jones We're not going to Delhi. We're going to Pankot Palace.
Pankot?! I can’t go to Pankot! I’m a singer!
Oh, what big birds!
Indiana Jones Those aren't big birds, sweetheart! They're giant vampire bats!
Indiana Jones [Indy and Shorty are playing poker; Willie is screaming and running away from numerous animals]
The biggest trouble with her is the noise.
Hey! You cheat, Doctor Jones! You cheat! You took four cards!
Indiana Jones [Willie is scared by an iguana]
It's a mistake.
No stuck! No mistake!
Indiana Jones They were stuck together! It was a MISTAKE!
I am very little, you cheat very big!
Indiana Jones [Willie is scared by an owl; Indy finds an ace card hidden in Shorty's sleeve]
Look at this. Look at THIS. You accuse me of cheating?! YOU'RE CHEATING!
Indiana Jones [Chinese, then]
I quit.
Indiana Jones [not wanting Shorty to see the dreadful sight]
Don't come up here.
Indiana Jones Yes there's something on the ground.
Feels like I step on fortune cookie!
Indiana Jones It's not fortune cookies. Let me take a look.
[Indy lights a lighter to find bugs crawling all over the place] (as a scorpion-like bug crawls on his leg)
That no cookie!
Indiana Jones [Indy and Shorty are trapped in a death room as the ceiling slowly descends]
Willie! Get in here!
Indiana Jones Willie! Willie, we're in trouble!
Indiana Jones [Spikes begin to come from the ceiling]
THIS IS SERIOUS!!!
There are two dead people down here!
Indiana Jones There are gonna be two dead people in here! Hurry!
I've almost had enough of you two!
Indiana Jones WILLIE!
What's the rush?
Indiana Jones It's a long story, Willie, hurry or you don't get to hear it!
[Unknowingly enters the bug room]
Ooh, God. What is this? Indy, what is this? I can't see a thing!
Indiana Jones Hurry!
Willie Scott [Lights a lantern] All right! Oh, I broke a nail. [Turns her hand over to see the ugly bug on it]
[After Willie realizes she is in a room filled with an uncountable amount of bugs]
Hurry, Willie!
They're in my hair!
Indiana Jones [Places a skull in the gear mechanism]
Aw, shut up, Willie!
Indy, let me in!
No, let us out!
Let me in!
Let us out!
Indiana Jones SHUT UP!
I'm down here! They're all over me! Let me in!
Indiana Jones There's got to be a fulcrum release lever somewhere!
A what?!
Indiana Jones A handle that opens the door!
Indiana Jones Go to the right hole!
Hurry, Willie!
Indiana Jones [Willie almost puts her hand into the hole on her left when Indy's hand comes out and grabs hers]
The other one, the other right. YOUR OTHER RIGHT.
There's slime inside! I can't do it!
Indiana Jones You can do it- feel inside!
Indiana Jones [sticks his fist through the hole]
DO IT NOW!!!
OKAY!!!
Indiana Jones [Willie slowly begins to push her hand through the hole] [panicking]
Willie, WE ARE GOING TO DIE!!!
You're gonna get killed chasing after your damn fortune and glory!
Indiana Jones Maybe. But not today.
[Indy is brought before Mola Ram]
You were caught trying to steal the Sankara Stones. There were five stones in the beginning. Over the centuries, they were dispersed by wars, sold off by thieves like you.
Indiana Jones Thieves like me, huh? Ha! You're still missing two.
A century ago, when the British raided this temple and butchered my people, a loyal priest hid the last two stones down here in the catacombs.
Indiana Jones So that's what you've got these slaves digging for? They're innocent children.
They dig for the gems to support our cause. They also search for the last two stones. Soon we will have all the five Sankara Stones, and the Thuggees will be all-powerful.
Indiana Jones What a vivid imagination.
Mola Ram (laughs as Short Round struggles to rip free from his captor): You don't believe me? You will, Dr. Jones. You will become a true believer.
(He and Indy laugh and the big Thuggee arrives in front of Indy)
Indy. Now let's get out of here.
Indiana Jones Right. All of us. [sets about freeing the child slaves]
Indiana Jones Let them go, Mola Ram!
You are in a position unsuitable to give orders!
Indiana Jones [threatening to drop the Sankara stones off of a high rope bridge]
You want the stones, let them go! LET THEM GO!!!!
[Indy, boxed in on the rope bridge by Thuggees, shouts in Chinese to Short Round]
Hang on, lady. We going for a ride.
[sees Indy raising his sword, about to cut the rope bridge down]
Oh, my GOD! Oh, my God... Oh, my God... Oh, my GOD! Is he nuts?!
He no nuts, he's crazy!
Indiana Jones Mola Ram! Prepare to meet Kali... IN HELL!
[starts to cut the bridge with his sword]
WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! YOU FOOL! NO...!
[the rope bridge falls apart, sending several Thuggees to their death in the crocodile-infested river below]
You could've kept it.
Indiana Jones Ah, what for? They'd just put it in the museum, it'd be another rock collecting dust.
But then it would have given you your fortune and glory.
Indiana Jones Anything can happen. It's a long way to Delhi.
No, thanks. No more adventures with you, Doctor Jones.
Indiana Jones Sweetheart, after all the fun we've had together?
If you think I'm going to Delhi with you, or anyplace else after all the trouble you've gotten me into, think again, buster! I'm going home to Missouri where they never feed you snakes before ripping your heart out and lowering you into hot pits! This is NOT my idea of a swell time! [to native] Excuse me sir? I need a guide to Delhi. If you could--
[Indy snaps his whip around Willie's waist and pulls her back; the two are about to kiss until Shorty's elephant blasts them both with water]
Very funny! Very funny!
Indy
Let them go, Mola Ram!
You are in a position unsuitable to give orders!
Indy
[threatening to drop the Sankara stones off of a high rope bridge]
You want the stones, let them go! [Willie smirks at Mola Ram] LET THEM GO!!!!
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