Ego I hired Yondu to pick you up after your mother passed away. But instead of returning you, Yondu kept you. I have no clue as to why.
I'll tell ya why: I was a skinny little kid who could slip into places adults couldn't, made it easier for thieving.
Ego Well, I've been trying to track you down ever since.
I thought Yondu was your father.
What? You're trying to tell me that this whole time you thought Yondu was my actual blood relative?
[Mouthful]
You look exactly alike!
No, he's not my father! Yondu was the guy who abducted me, kicked the crap out of me so I could learn to fight and kept me in terror by threatening to eat me.
Ego Eat you?!
Ego Oh, that son of a bitch!
Ego Well, even where I reside, out past the edge of what's known, we've heard tell about the man they call "Star-Lord." What say we head out there right now? Your associates are welcome. Even that triangle-faced monkey (Rocket) there.
Ego Welcome everyone, to my world.
Wow, you have your own planet?
Ego Come on, no larger than your Earth Moon.
Humility. I like it. I, too, am extraordinarily humble.
Ego Over millions of years, I learned to control the molecules around me. I grew smarter and stronger, and I continued building from there, layer by layer, the very planet you walk on now. But I wanted more. I desired meaning. There must be some life out there in the universe. Besides me, I thought. So, I set myself the task of finding it. I created what I thought biological life to be like, down to the most minute detail.
If he's a planet, how could he make a baby with your mother? He would smush her!
I don't need to hear how my parents, uh…
Why? My father would tell the story of him impregnating my mother every winter solstice.
[Affronted]
It was beautiful! You Earthers have hang-ups.
Ego Yes, Drax, I got a penis.
Ego And it's not half-bad.
[Drax interestingly stares at Ego's groin]
Ahhh.
[Quill and Gamora look beyond grossed out]
Ego Death will remain a stranger to both of us, as long as the light burns within the planet.
Ego Mmhmm.
Ego Yes! As long as the light exists.
Like, I could use the light to build cool things, like how you made this whole planet?
Ego Well, it might take a few million years of practice before you get really good at it. But yes!
What? Well, get ready for a eight hundred-foot statue of Pac-Man with Skeletor and Heather Locklear…
Ego Whatever you want.
I'm gonna make some weird shit.
[Gamora grabs Mantis by the neck and slams her against a wall]
Hey!
Who are you people?! What is this place?!
The bodies in the caverns, who are they?!
You are scared. [Gamora lets go of Mantis's neck]
Ego I call it the Expansion. It is my purpose. And now it’s yours as well.
Ego Over thousands of years I implanted thousands of extensions of myself on thousands of worlds. I need to fulfill life’s one true purpose… to grow and spread…covering all that exists… until everything is… me.
[reacting with Mantis' powers]
What did she do to me?
She already told me everything.
Ego I only had one problem. A single Celestial doesn’t have enough power for such an enterprise. But two Celestials… well, now, that just might do.
The bodies… are his children.
Ego Out of all my labors… the most beguiling was…attempting to graft my DNA with that of another species. I hoped the result of such a coupling would be enough…to power the Expansion. I had Yondu deliver some of them to me. It broke the Ravager code, but I compensated him generously… and to ease his conscience, I said I’d never hurt them. I mean, that was true. They never felt a thing. But one after the other, they failed me. Not one of them carried the Celestial genes. Until you, Peter. Out of all my spawn… only you carried the connection to the light.
We need to find Peter now and get off this damn planet.
Ego will have won him to his side by now. He has a way of -
All any of you do is yell at each other. You’re not friends.
You’re right. We’re family. We leave no one behind. [To Nebula] Except maybe you.
Ego For the first time in my existence... I am truly NOT ALONE! [Turns to see Peter looking doubtful] What is it, son?
Ego Now, well, you see, that's the mortal in you, Peter.
Ego We are beyond such things.
Ego Now--
But my mother... you said you loved my mother.
Ego And that I did. My River Lily, who knew all the words to every song that came over the radio. I returned to Earth to see her three times, and I knew if I returned a fourth, well... I'd never leave. The Expansion... the reason for my very existence would be over, so I did what I had to do. But... it broke my heart to put that tumor in her head.
[Outraged, shaking off Ego's influence]
What?!
Ego Now, now, all right, I know that sounds bad--
Ego [Quill repeatedly shoots Ego's avatar with his Quad Blasters, leaving several holes] [Reforming]
Who... in the HELL do you think you are?!
Ego I tried so hard to find the form... [Changes into David Hasselhoff] ...that best suited you, and this is the thanks I get?! [Changes back] You really need to grow up! [Pierces Quill with a tendril of energy] I wanted to do this together, but I suppose you'll have to learn by spending the next thousand years as a BATTERY!
