Stuntman Mike quotes from Grindhouse (2007)

Stuntman Mike

Get ready to fly, bitch!

Stuntman Mike

Well, that's alright. You're still a nice girl, and I still like you. But you know how people say [in a John Wayne drawl] "you're okay in my book" or "in my book that's no good"? Well, I actually have a book. And everybody I ever met goes in this book, and now I've met you, and you're going in the book too. Unfortunately, I'm going to have to file you under chicken...shit.

Stuntman Mike

The woods are lovely, dark and deep, and I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep. Do you hear me, Butterfly? Miles to go before you sleep.

Stuntman Mike

Hey! Ladies! That was fun. [laughs] Well... Adios!

Stuntman Mike

Do I frighten you? [Arlene nods] Is it my scar?

It's your car.

Pam

So what's your name, Icy?

Stuntman Mike

Stuntman Mike.

Pam

Stuntman Mike's your name?

Stuntman Mike

You ask anybody.

Pam

Hey, Warren. Who is this guy?

Stuntman Mike.

Pam

And who the hell is Stuntman Mike?

He's a stuntman.

Pam

How did you get into the stuntman industry?

Stuntman Mike

I'd assume the way everyone else gets into it.

Pam

How is that?

Stuntman Mike

My brother got me into it.

Pam

And who's your brother?

Stuntman Mike

Stuntman Bob.

Pam

Listen, double ****s, he's just giving me a ride. I'm not gonna **** him!

Stuntman Mike

I can hear you.

Pam

He's old enough to be my dad!

Stuntman Mike

I can still hear you!

Stuntman Mike

Alright Pam, which way are you heading?

Pam

Right.

Stuntman Mike

That's too bad...

Pam

Why?

Stuntman Mike

Well there was a fifty-fifty chance on which direction you'd take. You see we're both going left, you could've just as easily been going the same and if that happened it might have been awhile before you started to get scared. But seein' as you're going right, I'm afraid you're gonna have to get scared...immediately.

Pam

Hey, I, I get it. It's just a joke. I know all about jokes but if you can just let me out now, I promise I won't tell anybody because I know it's a joke. Please just-

Stuntman Mike

Hey Pam, remember how I said this car is death proof? Well that wasn't a lie, this car is a hundred percent death proof. But in order to get the full benefit of it honey, you really need to be sitting in my seat. [slams on the brakes and sends Pam face first into the dashboard, killing her]