Patches
[Patches has everyone lined up to explain the strategies of dodgeball]
If you're gonna learn to be true dodgeballers, then you've gotta learn the five Ds of dodgeball: dodge, duck, dip, dive and dodge! If you master the five Ds, no amount of balls on earth can hit you. [Justin raises his hand] Queerbait, go ahead.
Justin
Um, me? Or...I--Um...shouldn't we learn by...y'know, like dodging balls that are thrown at us, or...?
Patches
That's what this sack of wrenches is for. [empties the sack] If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.
Justin
What?
Patches
[Patches hurls a wrench in Justin's face, and he screams in pain]
Any other questions?
Justin
[screams]
Oh, my God! [still writhing in agony on the floor]
Peter
Uh, Patches, is this really necessary?
Patches
Necessary? Is it necessary for me to drink my own urine?
Peter
Probably not.
Patches
No! But I do it anyway, 'cause it's sterile and I like the taste!
Peter
...Okay...
