The Devil's Rejects 2005 quotes

48 quotes · 4 characters
The Devil's Rejects (2005) poster
Characters
Sheriff John Quincy Wydell William Forsythe · 16 quotes
Otis B. Driftwood Bill Moseley · 14 quotes
Baby Sheri Moon Zombie · 12 quotes
Captain Spaulding Sid Haig · 12 quotes

Most scenes together: Otis B. Driftwood & Baby (3), Sheriff John Quincy Wydell & Captain Spaulding (2)

The Devil's Rejects quotes

Page 1 of 4
[dancing in front of Otis and the hostages]

Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees, look at these. [repeated 4x]

Hoss, are you staring at my sister thinking bad thoughts?

Roy

No,

Well, why not- are you a ****?

Roy

No.

Well, what are ya then? I mean you got this hot, piece of ass shaking her shit right in front of you and you're not getting any ideas. What do you call that?

Roy

I'm a married man.

Oh, a married ****in' man. Hey, that's just great! Let's give him a big round of applause, folks for the married man! come on! [he and Baby clap and laugh]

Wow! married man!

All right. wow. okay, mama, front and center, on your feet.

Roy

Don't hurt her.

Get on your feet. Come on. Let's go.

Adam Banjo

Please, mister. This is insane.

Boy, the next word that comes out of your mouth better be some brilliant ****in' Mark Twain shit, 'cause it's definitely gettin' chiseled on your tombstone. okay, come on, Mama. Take that shit off, let's see what's been holding Hoss's balls at attention all these years.

Gloria

What?

What? Take off your clothes, or one of these assholes is going to die. Come on, come on.

Shit, way to go, Roy! she ain't too bad. She got a tight little ass on her!

And she got some child-rearing hips. Huh, yeah, hey.

Gloria

Please don't hurt me. please don't hurt me.

Here, ooh, Jeez. Roy, beginning to see what you mean. Whoa.

Gloria

Please don't hurt me.

You like this, don't ya? Say "Yes, I do. " You like that, don't ya? Say "Yes, I do. " Yes, I do. Yes, I do.

Gloria

Yes, I... I do.

Okay. Okay, now. Give me some sugar. Make it sweet. Don't want me to tense up my trigger finger. My finger's getting tense... I want you to say, "You're the almighty devil, and I want you to make me my filthy whore. " Come on, say it. Come on I know. I know you're feeling it. I know you're feeling it. Say it.

Gloria

You're... the... almighty... devil and I want you... to make me your... **** whore.

You make me sick.

Woo-hoo! I feel like we're all really getting to know each other now.

All right, ladies. Me and the boys have an errand to run. We'll be back in a little while. Come on, Hoss, move it. Come on, shit stain! Gotta go! Come on! God damn it!

I bet all the girls wanna **** you.

Roy Sullivan

Would you say that again?

I bet all the girls wanna **** you.

Roy Sullivan
[mutual laughter]

Do you kiss your mama with that mouth?

Trust me, fella. That ain't the only thing I do with this mouth.

I'm gonna have to be taking your car today. See I have some top secret clown business that supersedes any plans that you might have for this here vehicle.

Susan
[mutual laughter]

What's that about clown business?

[laughs nervously] [pause]

Do I stutter, bitch?

Billy Ray Snapper

Yeah no problem. Shit always seems to come our way, Chief.

Yeah maybe if you keep your mouth open long enough you can catch it all.

Alright, here are those names you wanted.

Rondo
[Chuckling]

These are some funny ass names.

Yeah look who's ****in' talking Rondo.

Charlie Altamont

Oh...yeah! Lord have mercy!! What a mornin'!! Clevon!!

Clevon

Yeah boss?

Charlie Altamont

You know why I come here to get these chickens?

Clevon

No boss.

Charlie Altamont

'Cuz my brother makes the best fried chicken in the world!

Clevon

Is that right?

Charlie Altamont
(to Darrell)

Yeah, good mornin' good mornin' good mornin' good mornin' sir! How are ya!

Darrell

How're you all doin? G'morning.

Charlie Altamont

Good, good, good, whatcha got for me?

Darrell

We got these, uh, real cute barred rock chickens.

Charlie Altamont

Yeah! I see it!

Darrell

Some nice, long-legged Rhode Island Reds.

Charlie Altamont

RHODE ISLAND RED!! I like that, huh! I want a Rhode Island red for me, all right? Two of 'em.

Darrell

Rhode Island Red...two. (long pause, scratches his nose) Now ya'll ain't planning on ****in' these chickens are ya?

Charlie Altamont
(after a long pause)

What the **** are you getting at? Do you **** chickens?

Darrell

Well, I thought about ****in' some chickens before, eh? If you want to have a good time and you need some pussy, you can (motions with his hands) cut that chicken's head off, stick yo' dick in the ass of that chicken, and that damn chicken'll go crazy on your ass and go "Caaaaah".

Charlie Altamont

Are you saying that I would cut off a chicken's head, put my dick in it, **** it...and go "Aah"? You accuse me of **** a chicken, mother****er?

Darrell

Nah, I ain't--I ain't callin' you a chicken ****er but...that boy over there looks se--sexually frustrated, and I don't approve of chicken ****.

Clevon

Did you hear what he called me, Boss? I ain't--he called me a **** chicken ****er!

Darrell

I didn't say--

Charlie Altamont

Go back and grab the ****in' chickens, Clevon!! (to Darrell) Here, five.

Darrell

Appreciate it...thank y'all.

Clevon

Chickenf--He's a chicken ****er!!!

Charlie Altamont

It's all right. Put 'em back there. Next time we go someplace else.

Clevon

We ain't never buying chickens from him again, boss!!

Charlie Altamont

Yeah, I know.

Clevon
(yelling back to Darrell)

You inbred! Inbred!!

[Otis and Baby invade a motel room, taking hostages]

Holy shit, check out that jacket.

What jacket?

On the TV.

Bitch **** the TV!

Hey, **** you!

**** you, will you just pay attention to the business at hand here!

Marty Walker

That goddamn **** Elvis Presley

What did you say about the King?

Marty Walker

I said he died three days before Grouch...

[Wydell grabs Walker]

Son, if you ever say another derogatory word about Elvis Aron Presley in my presence again, I will kick the living shit out of you.
[The rejects are being captured by Wydell] [To Captain Spaulding] :Charlie Altamont: Business is business, baby.

You **** asshole!

She's right Charlie, you are an asshole. Why don't you get back on your **** horse and ride.

Marty Walker

That goddamn **** Elvis Presley.

What'd you say about the King?!

Marty Walker

I said he died three days before Grouch...

Son, if you ever say another derogatory word about Elvis Aron Presley in my presence again, I will kick the living shit out of you! you get this Hollywood-loving pussy out of my face.

Marty Walker

Elvis is in Hollywood!

Get the hell outta here!

Marty Walker

His first film...

Marty Walker

"Love Me Tender," was based on an Irish folk song!

F*ck Groucho!

Ruth

Poopy! What do you need a gun for? Where are we going?

You ain't going nowhere, bitch.

Ruth

Oh, Poopy! Where are you going?

Get out of my **** way!

Ruth

Poopy, no!

If you're out there listening to this, I got a message for ya. I'm coming to get ya. You can't run forever. You're gonna have to stop somewhere, sometime, and when you do I'm gonna be there to put the wrath of the Lord up your ass.

Ruth

Poopy, don't go!

God damn it, stop calling me Poopy! Leave me alone, woman!

Ruth

I want my Poopy!

Leave me alone!

Ruth

Poopy, no!

What's going on, shitheads?

Rondo

Sheriff....

(hands Rondo a piece of paper)

Here's a list of names I need you to run down for me.

Rondo
[Looks at the paper, and starts chuckling]

That's some funny-ass names! Haha!

Yeah, look who's ****in' talkin' "Rondo". Just let me know if anything connects.

Billy Ray Snapper

I'm sure it will. Shit always floats our way, don't it...."Chief"?

Well, if you keep your mouth open wide enough maybe you'll catch it all....don't **** this up assholes.

Rondo

Have fun scraping all them brains up off the road! Haha.

Boy the next word that comes out of your mouth better be some **** brilliant Mark Twain shit. Cause it's definetly getting chisled on your tombstone.

Candy: What you lookin' at?
Otis B. Driftwood: I'm lookin' at you, mama.
Candy: Yeah, you see something you like?
Otis B. Driftwood: Maybe. I set my standards pretty low, so I'm never disappointed.
Candy: Oh I don't disappoint.

Dying's not an option, now you stick that back in that gray matter of yours and you make that stick. Cause any other thought's gonna get you cold slab toe tagged, mailed home to your mama in a plastic bag, are we crystal.