I spoke to your principal today, Ted. He said you're failing history.

Me and Bill-

He also said that if you fail history, you flunk out of school. You know what that would mean, don't you, Ted?

That I would have to go to Oates Military Academy. Sir.

I spoke to Colonel Oates this morning. He's anxious to meet you, Ted...

[back outside]

Dude, we gotta pass; otherwise, there's no more band.

Why?

My dad's sending me to military school.

Where?

Alaska...