[to Kiki]
Oh, hey, I know you. You're that chick that always picks up my kid from school when I forget-slash-don't want to.
Amy Mitchell
Mila Kunis · 15 quotes
Carla Dunkler
Kathryn Hahn · 12 quotes
Kiki
Kristen Bell · 9 quotes
Gwendolyn James
Christina Applegate · 4 quotes
Most scenes together: Carla Dunkler & Kiki (9), Amy Mitchell & Carla Dunkler (8), Amy Mitchell & Kiki (8)
Bad Moms quotes
Page 2 of 2First of all, I just wanna say this, that I think that we, as moms, do way too much stuff. And if I'm elected, I promise you we are gonna do way less. [crowd cheers] Right? Less PTA meetings, less luncheons, less ****in' bake sales, just less bullshit! [crowd cheers louder] Wait, wait, wait, wait. And I think that our kids need a break, too, you guys. Come on, now, school starts way too **** early, okay? God, and they have way too much homework. I mean, our kids don't even have time to be kids anymore, am I right? And what is up with these five standardized tests a week? We should not be teaching our kids how to be good test-takers. We should be teaching them how to be good people! What is a standardized test? So, if you're a mom who's overworked, overstressed, or if you're just a mom who wants to do less...then just vote for me. [crowd cheers]
For those of you who have been living under a rock...I am Gwendolyn James. I am the president of the PTA, but most importantly, I am the proud mommy to two beautiful daughters, Blaire and Gandhi. Now, I called this emergency PTA meeting to address an issue that radically affects the safety of our children. The bake sale.
I'm Amy Mitchell, and I'm a mom. I had my first kid when I was 20 years old, and I've been running late ever since. My days are filled with dropping the kids at school... Love you. ...then racing to work where I have meeting, after meeting, after meeting. I usually end up eating a shitty lunch at my desk, and I try to work out once a week. [sighs] Why do I suck at Zumba? Most days, I race back to school for the kids' plays, and poetry readings and class projects...which I'm always late for. [mouthing] Sorry. And then there's PTA meetings, and volunteering and parent-teacher conferences. Jesus, Miss Wiggins ****in' hates me. At least once a day, I feel like the worst mom in the world, and I cry in my car. [wailing] Then I shuttle the kids to piano lessons and soccer games and dance classes and doctors' appointments, before my daily trip to the grocery store. Ugh. This chick seems like she's got it all figured out. But I feel like I'm screwing up all the time. Still, I love being a mom.
When I was in my twenties, I would just walk down the street and it would just be raining dicks wherever I went. It was just dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick, dick. It was, like, forecast, lot of ****!