Cat R. Waul quotes from An American Tail: Fievel Goes West (1991)

Cat R. Waul

So, what do we have here? It appears to be a young pioneer. Now, the feline in me would like to devour this tender young morsel, but the shrewd businessman in me knows that if I do, the other mice will miss him and come looking for him. But the gourmet in me quivers at the thought of mouse tartar... but the entrepreneur prefers not to be inundated by suspicious mice that could jeopardize my plan. So, I must exercise both willpower and finesse. Scamper back to your parents, little mouse, and do be careful! It's frightfully hazardous out there! [to Chula, as Fievel leaves] Give him the "flying aah", and make it good.

Cat R. Waul

It's too tough, kid. Get out while you still can.

I win again! Fathead!

I saw you're cheatin'. You've played your last hand, Chula.

I don't think so. [holds up loads of aces with his legs] I GOT SEVEN MORE! DOG-CHOW!

Why you rotten, lowdown, double-dealin'...

I don't get it, boss. How come we're not munchin' those mice back there?

Oui. This fraternity with mice does run counter to nature.

Cat R. Waul

Which would you rather have? The crouton, or the entire Caesar Salad? Of course, we will eat the mice, but only after we have exploited their labors. We are nice to the mice because it is intelligent to be so, see? If we act sweetly, they will come in droves. If we hiss, they will run, and we will have to chase after them, an unnecessary expenditure of calories.

So, when do we take the big bite, boss?

What do we get to eat them? WHEN, WHEN, WHEN, WHEN?!

Cat R. Waul

When my empire at Green River is complete, and when we have a better mousetrap.

MOUSEBURGERS!

Cat R. Waul

Yes! Mouseburgers, indeed! Music...to aid the digestion.

Cat R. Waul

Please, there's no need for such a bleak assessment of your situation. After all, what are neighbors for? A cup of sugar, a saucer of cream. A pail of water, perhaps.

Water? I'll give 'em water. [spitting]

Cat R. Waul

I'd like to share a vision. A vision of a better world. A world where cats and mice live and work side by side. A world where mothers raise their mouselings without fear. Where musicians receive their proper due. Where young mousettes fulfill their every, dream. Will you help me...build this world?
[Various mice cheering]

Cat R. Waul

Next. [pulls lever and opens a trap door on stage which the opera singing mouse falls into] Terrible! Terrible! Absolutely, positively appalling. I must have a voice to match the opulence of this salOON!

Oh, pussy, pussy, pussy, pussy! Pussy, pussy! Oh, pussy!

Cat R. Waul

Humans! Yeeuk! So shiny and... pleh! [to Chula] Right! I want the subversive who tried to asassinate me found.

I just love finding subversives! [Chula spits a spiderweb on Cat R. Waul's face, the same time Fievel gets his shirt caught on the needle of a record player] Hey, boss, what's a subversive?

Cat R. Waul

Someone who doesn't have very long to live. [Fievel tries to run and plays some music, which Cat R. Waul notices] Well, if it isn't my diminutive friend from the train.

Fievel

Cat R. Waul, I heard what you said about the Mouseburgers, and I'm gonna tell everyone. I'm gonna get Wylie Burp, 'cause he's the law.

Cat R. Waul

The Wylie Burp? [he and the saloon erupt in laughter] That quaint historical figure? [he picks Fievel up on a fork] Simply put, mouseling: I am the law here, and you're a mere hors d'oeuvre.

Well, well, will you look what the cat dragged in? [sees Tanya] A mouse. That's a first.

Cat R. Waul

Not just any mouse! This is a diva.

Diva schmiva! You put a mouse on the stage, and your saloon's gonna be as empty as Death Valley on a cold day in June when the snow don't fall.

Cat R. Waul

What? They'll love her! They'll adore her! And those who don't will answer to me.

Anything you say, Pussypoos.

Cat R. Waul

Yes, I have mentioned that I dislike being referred to as 'Pussypoos'.

Yeah? Well, maybe I'm not so happy about being dumped in nature's ashtray five hundred miles from a pastrami sandwich, either, Pussypoos.

Cat R. Waul

Yes, I-I-I think I just mentioned, didn't I, that I dislike being referred to as PUSSYPOOS?!

As for the mousette, I'll get her on the stage for you.

Cat R. Waul

See that you do. [to Tanya] Farewell, my diva. [leaves in a Phantom of the Opera manner]

Tiger

If you harm one patch of fur on her again, and I'll tear you apart... [Chula shoots a web at Tiger, but Tiger grabs it.] ...one leg at a time! [he twirls Chula's web as a lasso with him trapped in it, and he throws Chula onto Cat R. Waul's head and Miss Kitty falls from the building, but Tiger catches her just in time before she hits the ground.]

Ooh!

Tiger

Okay, Wylie!

Wylie Burp

Let 'em rip, kid!

Fievel

Yes, Sir, Mr. Burp, Sir! [adjusts the giant gun, jumps off, and it fires, cutting the ribbon which flings Cat R. Waul and his men into the sky. Fievel, Wylie Burp, Miss Kitty, Tiger, Red, Micheal, the Mousekewitzes, and the other mice watch as they land in a mail bag near the train tracks.]

Cat R. Waul

And now-- [before he can finish his sentence, a train grabs the mail bag, knocking over the water tower in the process.] REVENGE!

Oh, Pussypoos!

Cat R. Waul

Oh, no!

Come to Mommy, darling! [She dresses him up in baby clothes and hugs him tightly.] Mommy's going to take care of you forever, and ever and ever! [Laughs]