Alice in Wonderland (1951) · 50 quotes
2nd most-quoted character in Alice in Wonderland (1951): in 10 of its 50 quotes
Most scenes with: Alice (7)
White Rabbit Why, Mary Ann! What are you doing out here?
Mary Ann?
White Rabbit Don't just do something, stand there... Uh... no no! Go go! Go get my gloves! I'm late!
But late for what? That's just what I...
White Rabbit My gloves! [Blows trumpet] At once, do you hear!
Goodness. I suppose I'll be taking orders from Dinah next.
White Rabbit We need a lazard with a liddle... a lad... can you help us?
At your service, gov'nor.
Bill, my lad. Have you ever been down a chimney?
Why, gov'nor, I've been down more chimneys...
Excellent, excellent. Now just hop down the chimney and pull that monster out of there.
Righto, gov'nor... Monster? Aaaaah!
We'll blow the thing there out, we'll smoke the monster out!
White Rabbit We'll smoke the monster ou... [realizes what he just sang]
White Rabbit NO! No-ho! My poor house and furniture!
What's the matter, my dear? Don't you care for tea?
Why, yes. I'm very fond of tea, but-
If you don't care for tea, you could at least make polite conversation!
I have an excellent idea. Let's change the subject.
Why is a raven like a writing desk?
Riddles? [to herself] Let me see. Why is a raven like a writing desk?
I beg your pardon?
Why is a raven like a writing desk?
But it's your silly riddle. You just said...
THE TIME! THE TIME! WHO'S GOT THE TIME?
White Rabbit N-n-n-no time, no time, no time! Hello, good bye, I'm late, I'm late.
The rabbit!
White Rabbit I'm so late! I'm so very late.
Well, no wonder you're late! Why this clock is EXACTLY two days slow!
Rabbit Two days slow?
Of course you're late! [chuckles as he dunks the watch in the tea] MY GOODNESS! We'll have to look into this. [places a salt shaker over his eye and uses it as a jeweler's eyepiece ] AHA! I see what's wrong with it! [starts to pry parts out of the watch with a fork ] Why, this watch is full of wheels!
Rabbit OH, MY POOR WATCH!! OH, MY WHEELS! AND SPRINGS! But-but-but-but-but-but-
BUTTER! Of course! It NEEDS some butter. BUTTER!!!
Rabbit B-b-butter?
Butter! Oh, thank you! Ha ha! Yes! That's FINE! Yes, thank you!
Rabbit Oh, no, no! No, no! No! You'll get crumbs in it!
Oh, THIS is the VERY BEST butter! [throws butter in rabbit's face] What are you talking about?
Tea?
Oh, tea! I never THOUGHT of tea before! OF COURSE!
Rabbit NO!
TEA! HEHEHE!
Rabbit NO! NOT TEA!
Sugar?
SUGAR! TWO SPOONS! Yes, ha, TWO SPOONS thank you, Yes! (jams the spoons straight into the watch)
Rabbit OH, PLEASE! BE CAREFUL!
JAM?
JAM! I FORGOT ALL ABOUT JAM!
Rabbit NO! NO! NOT JAM!
Yes, sure you want. It's nice to see.
MUSTARD??
Mustard! yes...huh? MUSTARD?! DON'T LET'S BE SILLY!!! LEMON, that's different, that's... yes. THAT should work! Hahaha! [watch starts going crazy] LOOK AT THAT!
IT'S GOING MAD!
OH, MY GOODNESS!
Rabbit OH, DEAR!
I DON'T UNDERSTAND! IT'S THE BEST BUTTER!
IT'S GOING MAD! MAD WATCH! MAD WATCH! MAD WATCH!!!
OH, MY GOODNESS! OH, DEAR, LOOK AT THAT!
THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO STOP A MAD WATCH! [smashes watch with a mallet; scene changes from color to black and white, then color again]
Two days slow. That's what it is.
White Rabbit Her Imperial Highness, Her Grace, Her Excellency, Her Royal Majesty, the Queen of Hearts! [Crowd cheers] ... And the King.
Hooray!
White Rabbit Your Majesty, members of the jury, loyal subjects... and the King... the prisoner at the bar stands accused of enticing Her Majesty, the Queen of Hearts, into a game of croquet, thereby and with malice of forethought, molesting, tormenting, and otherwise annoying our beloved...
Never mind all that! Get to the part where I lose my temper.
White Rabbit ...Thereby causing the Queen to lose her temper.
Sentence? But there has to be a verdict first...
Sentence first! Verdict afterwards.
But that just isn't the way...
...Your ways, Your Majesty.
Yes, my child. [giggles] [yelling] OFF WITH HER---!!!
Consider, my dear. We called no witnesses. Couldn't we hear... maybe one or two, huh? Maybe...?
Ohhh, very well--- [yelling] BUT GET ON WITH IT!!!!!!!!!
I wonder who lives here.
The White Rabbit Mary Ann? Drat that girl. Where could she have put them? Mary Ann?
The rabbit.
The White Rabbit Mary Ann? No use, can't wait, I'm awfully late. Oh me, oh my.
Excuse me, sir, but I've been trying to...
The White Rabbit Why, Mary Ann! What are you doing out here?
Mary Ann?
The White Rabbit Don't just do something, stand there... Uh... no, no! Go, go! Go get my gloves! I'm late!
But late for what? That's just what I...
The White Rabbit My gloves! [Blows trumpet] At once, do you hear!?
Goodness. I suppose I'll be taking orders from Dinah next.
The White Rabbit A monster, Dodo, in my house.
Dodo?
The White Rabbit My poor house.
Steady, old chap. Can't be as bad as all that, you know?
The White Rabbit My poor roof and rafters. All my walls... There it is!
By Jove. Jolly well is, isn't it?
The White Rabbit Do something.
Yes, indeed. Extraordinary situation, but...
The White Rabbit But what?
But I have a very simple solution.
Thank goodness.
The White Rabbit What is it?
Simply pull it out the chimney.
The White Rabbit Go ahead. Pull it out.
Who? Me? Don't be ridiculous. What we need is a lizard with a ladder.
The White Rabbit Oh! Bill! Bill, we need a lizard with a ladder. Can you help us?
At your service, gov'nor.
Bill, my lad. Have you ever been down a chimney?
Why, gov'nor, I've been down more chimneys...
Excellent, excellent. Now, just hop down the chimney and pull that monster out of there.
Righto, gov'nor... Monster? Aaaaah!
That's better. Bill, my lad, you're passing up a golden opportunity.
I am?
You can be famous.
I can?
Of course. There's a brave lad. In you go, now. Nothing to it, old boy. Simply tie your tail around the monster's neck and drag it out.
But, guvnor...
Good luck, Bill.
No room! No room! No room!
I thought there was plenty of room.
Ah, but it's very rude to sit down without being invited.
I'll say it's rude. It's very, very rude indeed.
Very, very rude indeed.
I'm very sorry. But I did enjoy your singing, and I wonder if you could tell me…
You enjoyed our singing?
Oh, what a delightful little child! I'm so excited. We never get compliments. You must have a cup of tea.
Ah, yes, indeed. The tea. You must have a cup of tea.
That would be very nice. I'm sorry I interrupted your birthday party. [March Hare offers her a cup of tea] Thank you.
Birthday? Ha-ha-ha. My dear child, this is NOT a birthday party!
Of course not. This is an unbirthday party.
Unbirthday? Well, I'm sorry, but I don't quite understand.
It's very simple. Now, 30 days has Septem -No, wait... An unbirthday, if you have a birthday, then, you- [laughs] She doesn't know what an unbirthday is.
How silly. I shall elucidate. [March Hare conducts pots making organ and calliope sounds] Now, statistics prove, prove that you've one birthday.
Imagine, just one birthday ever year.
But there are 364 unbirthdays.
Precisely why we're gathered here to cheer!
Then today is my unbirthday too!
It is?
What a small world this is.
In that case... [singing] A very merry unbirthday...
To me?
To you.
A very merry unbirthday
For me?
For you!
Now blow the candle out, my dear, and make your wish come true. [Alice blows the candle which becomes a firework rocket]
A very merry unbirthday to you! [The firework explodes and the Dormouse emerges floating down among the sparks]
Twinkle, twinkle little bat, how I wonder what you're at. Up above the world you fly, like a tea tray in the sky. [lands in teapot]
And now, my dear... You were saying that you would like to see... Pardon me. You were seeking some information of some kind?
Oh, yes. You see, I'm looking for a...
Clean cup, clean cup. Move down.
But I haven't used my cup.
Clean cup, clean cup, move down, move down. Clean cup, clean cup, move down, move down.
Would you like a little more tea?
Well, I haven't had any yet, so I can't very well take more.
Ah, you mean you can't very well take less.
Yes. You can always take more than nothing.
But I only meant that...
And now, my dear... Something seems to be troubling you. Won't you tell us all about it?
Start at the beginning.
Yes. And when you come to the end... stop. See?
Well it started while I was sitting on the riverbank with Dinah.
Very interesting. [sips some tea and swallows] Who's Dinah? [pants like a dog]
Why, Dinah's my cat. You see-
Cat? CAT?! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! [runs around in a frenzy with The Mad Hatter and March Hare chasing him]
Oh dear!
Catch him!
Hurry!
Get him off!
CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT! CAT!
Hurry! The jam! Quick! Get the jam! On his nose! [Alice grabs some jam] Put it on his nose!
Put it on his nose. On his nose. [As they restrain the Dormouse in a teapot, Alice smears some jam on his nose]
But the cat...[calms down]
Ohh!
Ahh...
Ah, thank goodness! Those are the things that upset me!
See all the trouble you started?
But I didn't think...
Ah, that's just it. If you don't think, then you shouldn't talk.
Clean cup, clean cup. Move down, move down, move down.
But I still haven't used...
Move down, move down, move down, move down.
And now, my dear, as you were saying...?
Oh, yes. I was sitting on the riverbank with you know who.
I do?
I mean my C-A-T.
Tea?
Just half a cup, if you don't mind.
What's the matter, my dear? Don't you care for tea?
Why, yes. I'm very fond of tea, but-
If you don't care for tea, you could at least make polite conversation!
I have an excellent idea. Let's change the subject.
Why is a raven like a writing desk?
Riddles? [to herself] Let me see. Why is a raven like a writing desk?
I beg your pardon?
Why is a raven like a writing desk?
But it's your silly riddle. You just said...
THE TIME! THE TIME! WHO'S GOT THE TIME?
The White Rabbit No time, no time, no time! Hello, goodbye, I'm late, I'm late.
The White Rabbit!
The White Rabbit I'm so late! I'm so very late.
Well, no wonder you're late! Why, this clock is EXACTLY two days slow!
The White Rabbit Two days slow?
Of course you're late! [chuckles as he dunks the watch in the tea] MY GOODNESS! We'll have to look into this. [places a salt shaker over his eye and uses it as a jeweler's eyepiece] AHA! I see what's wrong with it! [starts to pry parts out of the watch with a fork] Why, this watch is full of wheels!
The White Rabbit OH, MY POOR WATCH! OH, MY WHEELS AND SPRINGS! But-but-but-but-but-but-
BUTTER! Of course! It NEEDS some butter. BUTTER!
The White Rabbit Butter?
Butter! Oh, thank you! Ha-ha! Yes! That's FINE!
The White Rabbit Oh, no, no! No, no! No! You'll get crumbs in it!
Oh, THIS is the VERY BEST butter! [throws butter in the White Rabbit's face] What are you talking about?
Tea?
Oh, tea! I never THOUGHT of tea before! OF COURSE! TEA! HE-HE-HE!
The White Rabbit NO! [shocked] NO! NOT TEA!
Sugar?
SUGAR! TWO SPOONS! Yes, ha, TWO SPOONS thank you, yes! [jams the spoons straight into the watch]
The White Rabbit Oh please, BE CAREUL!
JAM?
JAM! I FORGOT ALL ABOUT JAM! Yes, sure you want. It's nice to see.
The White Rabbit No! No! Not jam!
MUSTARD?
Mustard! Yes... What? MUSTARD?! Don't let's be silly! Lemon, that's different, there. THAT should do it! Hahaha! [watch starts going crazy] LOOK AT THAT!
IT'S GOING MAD!
OH, MY GOODNESS!
The White Rabbit OH, DEAR!
IT IS GOING MAD! MAD WATCH!
I DON'T UNDERSTAND, IT'S THE BEST BUTTER!
MAD WATCH! MAD WATCH! MAD WATCH!
OH, LOOK! OH, MY GOODNESS!
THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO STOP A MAD WATCH! [smashes watch with a mallet. The scene changes from color to black and white, then color again]
Two days slow. That's what it is.
The White Rabbit Oh, my watch...
It was?
The White Rabbit And it was an unbirthday present, too.
Well, in that case...
A very merry unbirthday to you!
Mr. Rabbit. Oh, Mr. Rabbit. Now where did he go to? Of all the silly nonsense. This is the stupidest tea party I've ever been to in all my life.
The White Rabbit Her Imperial Highness, Her Grace, Her Excellency, Her Royal Majesty, the Queen of Hearts! [The crowd cheers] ...And the King.
Hooray!
Hmm! Who's been painting my roses red? WHO'S BEEN PAINTING MY ROSES RED? /Who dares to taint / With vulgar paint / The royal flower bed? / For painting my roses red / Someone will lose his head.
Oh, no, Your Majesty, please! It's all his fault!
Not me, your grace! The Ace, the Ace!
You?
No, Deuce!
The Deuce, you say?
Not me! The 3!
That's enough! Off with their heads!
They're going to lose their heads for painting the roses red. It serves them right, they planted white and roses should be red. They're going to lose their heads.
Silence!
Oh, please, they were only trying...
And who is this?
Let me see, my dear. It's certainly not a heart. Do you suppose it's a club?
Why, it's a little girl.
Yes. And I was hoping...
Look up. Speak nicely. And don't twiddle your fingers. Turn out your toes. Curtsy. Open your mouth a little wider. And always say, Yes, Your Majesty.
Yes, Your Majesty.
Now, where d'you come from and where are you going?
I'm trying to find my way home.
Your way? All ways here are my ways!
Yes, I know. But I was just thinking...
Curtsy while you're thinking. It saves time.
Yes, Your Majesty. But I was only going to ask...
I'll ask the questions! Do you play croquet?
Yes, Your Majesty.
Then let the game begin!
