Tied for most-quoted character in Airplane II: The Sequel (1982): in 6 of its 40 quotes
Scenes with Steve McCroskey
6 scenes
Steve McCroskey Jacobs, I want to know absolutely everything that's happened up till now.
J Jacobs
Well, let's see. First the Earth cooled. And then the dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat, so they all died and they turned into oil. And then the Arabs came and they bought Mercedes Benzes. [McCroskey walks off] And Prince Charles started wearing all of Lady Di's clothes. I couldn't believe it- [Jacobs turns and starts to walk away, continuing to speak, trailing off as he gets further from the camera] he took her best summer dress and he put it on and went to town...
Steve McCroskey Jacobs, what have you got on Elaine Dickinson?
J Jacobs
Well, I'm two inches taller, a better dancer, and much more fun to be with.
Steve McCroskey [drunkenly]
Gentlemen, I don't find it easy to talk at a time like this, but I got to say something about that guy up there, and I can sum it all up in just one word: courage...dedication, daring, pride, pluck, spirit, grit, mettle, and G-U-T-S, *guts*. Why, Ted Striker's got more guts in his little finger than most of us have in our large intestine, including the colon. [He gestures extravagantly and falls over]
Steve McCroskey We keep losing their radio!
BK Bug Kruger
Give it to me straight, McCroskey! What's it look like?
Steve McCroskey [puzzled]
The radio? About so big, green, with numbers and lots of knobs...what?
BK Bug Kruger
I mean the situation! What do your people think?
C2 Controller #2
[The controllers begin thinking about the people in the hijacked airplane]
They're screwed!
C3 Controller #3
They're dead!
CJ Controller Jacobs
Did I leave the iron on?
Steve McCroskey Listen good. That thing is bound to come apart on you at that speed, and that's no good! It's got to be in one piece when you land on the moon! You know damn well that that warp drive has never been tested! [stabs his cigarette into the left hand of the controller sitting next to him] You're putting yourself and everybody else on that ship in jeopardy!
AF Art Fleming
[Cuts to Art Fleming hosting a Jeopardy! game on the shuttle with the passengers as the contestants]
All right, Contestant #38.
C3 Contestant #38
Art, I'll take Air Shuttle Disasters for $40.
AF Art Fleming
The answer is... [The $40 display rotates to reveal the answer] ...the Mayflower!
Steve McCroskey We're all betting on you. [In another room, people draw their bets as to whether the Shuttle passengers will die or not]
Other characters in Airplane II: The Sequel
