Dr. Arliss Loveless quotes from Wild Wild West (1999)

Dr. Arliss Loveless

Today, I'm proud to be able to sit before y'all and tell you that the wrongs will be righted...the past made present... the United, Divided! [unveils map of a partitioned US and explains it all] Great Britain gets back the 13 original colonies, minus Manhattan. Florida and the Fountain of Youth go back to Spain. Texas, New Mexico, California, Arizona revolve a Mexico. [refers to "Loveless Land" encompassing Oregon, Nevada, Kansas and the Territories of Utah, Washington, Idaho, Colorado, Dakota, Montana, and Nebraska] And a little piece for me to retire on. [guests laugh]

Dr. Arliss Loveless

Mr. West...how nice of you to join us tonight and add COLOR to these monochromatic proceedings.

Jim West

Well, when a fella comes back from the dead, I find that an occasion to STAND UP and be counted.

Loveless

Ms. East informs me that you expected to see Gen. McGrath here. Well, I knew him years ago, but I haven't seen him in a COON'S age.

West

Well, I can see where it would be difficult for a man of your stature to keep in touch with even HALF the people you know.

Loveless

Well, perhaps the lovely Ms. East will keep you from being a SLAVE to your disappointment.

West

Well, you know beautiful women; they encourage you one minute, then CUT THE LEGS out from under you the next.

Loveless

...Quite.

YOU SAWED-OFF SADISTIC BASTARD, YOU BETRAYED US!

Dr. Arliss Loveless

My dear General, having donated half of my physical being to create a weapon capable of doing this, how did you and General Lee repay my loyalty? You surrendered at Appomattox! So who betrayed whom? [to Munitia] Munitia, make note the turret speed needs to be accelerated.

Change gear ratio from 2.2 to 2.8.

Scream...scream... "Help me." "Do not pull my arm!"

I demand you give the order to stop this slaughter now!

Loveless

We'll need more loading drills. I hear too much time between screams.

You give them the order to desist!

Loveless

I understand your distress, but these men are not dying senselessly. It is for a far greater cause than you can possibly imagine.

You go straight to hell, sir!

Loveless

After you, sir. [shoots McGrath with rear-firing gun from wheelchair. McGrath dies and Loveless looks back at him] Bloodbath McGrath indeed! [to foreign dignitaries] Well, I think that concludes this night's festivities. Ladies, feed him to the crabs. Gentlemen, since the beginning of written history, a nation's power has been measured by the size of its standing army. Tonight that chapter will be closed. The traditional army, to say nothing of the United States, will become extinct, laid low by a "cripple"- as the general so amusingly implied, and mechanology. But my friends, that tank is just a little hors d'oeuvre compared to what the country's greatest scientists are cooking up for me next. So, if I have piqued your interest, bring one thousand kilograms of your country's gold to Spider Canyon within the next four days. And now if you'll excuse me, I have a tank to catch.