[All three are sprawled on the front lawn, high on ecstacy]
I love you guys. No seriously. Look I realize I can be like a huge dick sometimes, I'm really sorry for that.
No it's not. JB, I'm sorry for buying you a bra on your birthday. That wasn't cool.
J.B. Wasn't cool man.
And I'm sorry for all the times I called you "fat ****." "Pudgy bitch." "Fudgy the whale." And I'm sorry for that time at your brother's Bar Mitzvah when I told everyone you look like Rosie O'Donnell because you don't.
J.B. I don't.
Hey guys? I hooked up with Kirby. I'm like, really into her.
Okay seriously Thomas, that's like cool and all, but she's like always been around. It's like hooking up with J.B., but her tits are smaller.
J.B. Hey.
I'm just saying. Kirby's sort of like, one of us. Tonight's about the girls we never had a shot at. Tonight's about changing the game.
Dad I just didn't think you had it in you.
I know. Sorry I let you down.
Dad No, I literally didn't think you had this in you. So uh, how many people were here?
Uh, 15 hundred. Couple thousand maybe.
Dad Wow.
You should have seen it. It was awesome.
Dad Well, you're still **** Thomas.
Mom I'm just worried.
Dad About what?
Mom I don't know. Thomas, leaving him alone all weekend.
Dad Oh please. Come on honey, he's 17 years old.
Mom That's what I'm worried about.
Dad Let's be realistic here. This is Thomas we're talking about. He's not exactly Mr. Popular.
Mom What is that supposed to mean?
Dad I'm just saying that he's not that type of kid, you know. He's got a couple friends, they're gonna hang out, but they're not gonna do anything. He's a sweet kid, but he's a loser.
Rob [as the riot police close in]
Hey Oliver! Great party buddy. [points to a flaming tree in his front yard] You owe me a **** tree, you piece of shit!
All we were trying to do was have a good time, you cocksucking mother****er! This is your fault!
Rob I'll kill you, you **** punk! You know where you're going? You're going to jail you mother****er! You're gonna-OW!
(Everett and Tyler run up to Rob and tackle him to the ground)
Yeah! That's my boys! Suck my dick, Robert! Suck my **** dick!
Rob [knocking on the door]
Hey, Thomas. Look man I don't want to be a dick here or anything, but your friend Oliver came by earlier and told me you guys were having a little party but this is too much.
Yeah. We actually should be winding down like midnight, maybe 1. Is that okay?
Rob No, it's not. I'm sorry. The baby can't sleep and Melinda's gotta be up early for work.
[walks up]
**** yeah! My boy Rob is here to rage! Good to see you, brother.
Rob Whoa, yeah. Actually I'm not raging, but I'm just telling Thomas it's time to shut it down.
You can't be serious. This is a great party. What the ****?
Rob I am serious because it's 11:30 at night and it's time to wrap it up.
J.B. Hey, hey, hey. Why don't we just bring everyone to the back and lower the volume a bit.
Rob Guys, this isn't a request! The party's over.
I guess we're just gonna have to agree to disagree then, aren't we?
Rob Listen to me. Thomas, either shut it down or I'm calling the cops. Fine, **** it! I'm calling the **** cops.
[gets a taser shot by Everett]
****! Oh shit!
J.B. Jesus **** Christ! What did you do that for?
[Rob punches Everett in the face]
Are you **** kidding me? I will **** kill you!
Rob The little **** tazed me! I'm definitely calling the cops now!
You punched a kid in the face! I'm calling the cops on your ass now!
Rob Do it, genius! It's all on tape. I just saw this mother ****er record it right here.
Dax No, all I got was you punching that little child's face.
Rob **** you!
[Looking at a picture from when they were younger]
Oh my god. What was wrong with me? Wow, this was before Costa.
Yeah, back when you were still in the crew.
[He holds the picture next to her face]
You used to be so cute, what happened?
Shut the **** up. It still looks like me.
[He kisses her]
Was that weird? I'm sorry. Shit that was weird wasn't it?
Kirby I'm really sorry about what happened. I didn't know how to handle it. But I think I do now and that's why I'm here. My life right now, it's totally ruined, okay. I practically burned down my whole neighborhood. Probably bankrupted my parents. I'll be in debt until I die. But, the only thing I care about fixing right now is this. So, I'm sorry. You're still mad. I get it. But if you are talking to me about my next birthday, I'd really like to spend it with just you.
[She kisses him]
So we're cool again?
I never said you were cool.
[They hug. Thomas motions for Dax to stop filming]
My parents are gonna crucify me if anything gets **** up! You know what I don't care if everyone thinks I'm a dick, I'm getting them out of the house.
[Thomas stands on a chair]
Dude what the **** are you doing? Thomas! Please don't embarrass me like this!
Alexis Yeah, Thomas! Woow!
[Crowd cheers]
