Tia Dalma quotes from Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest (2006)

Tia Dalma

You... You have a touch of destiny about you, William Turner!

Will

You know me?

Tia Dalma

You want to know me..

Jack

There will be no knowing here! We've come for help and we're not leaving without it. [to Tia Dalma.] I thought I knew you.

Tia Dalma

Not so well as I had hoped.

Tia Dalma

You know I demand payment.

Jack

I brought payment. Look. [shoots Jack the monkey, which cannot die.] An undead monkey! Top that!

Tia Dalma

You know of Davy Jones, yes? A man of the sea. A great sailor. Until he ran afoul of that which vexes all men.

Will

What vexes all men?

Tia Dalma

What, indeed?

Gibbs

The sea?

Pintel

Sums?

Ragetti

The dichotomy of good and evil?

Jack

A woman.

Tia Dalma

See, it was a woman. He fell in love...

Gibbs

No, no, no, I heard it was the sea he fell in love with.

Tia Dalma

Same story, different versions. And all are true. You see, it was a woman. As harsh, changing and untamable like the sea. Him never stopped loving her...

Tia Dalma

Davy Jones cannot make port. Cannot step foot on land but once every ten years. Land is where you are safe, Jack Sparrow. [handing Jack a jar of dirt] Therefore you must take land with you.

Jack

Dirt. This is a jar of dirt.

Tia Dalma

Yes.

Jack

Is the jar of dirt going to help?

Tia Dalma

If you no want it, give it back.

Jack

No.

Tia Dalma

Then it helps.

Will

If there was anything could be done to bring him back... Elizabeth...

Tia Dalma

Would you do it? Hmmm? What... would you? Hmmm? What would any of you be willing to do? Hmmm? Would you sail to the end or the earth, and beyond, to fetch back witty Jack and 'im precious Pearl?

Gibbs

Aye!

Pintel

Aye!

Ragetti

Aye!

*Squawk!* Aye, aye!

Elizabeth

Yes.

Will

Aye.

Tia Dalma

Good. But if you're goin' brave de weird and haunted shores at World's End, den... you will need a captain who knows dose waters.

So tell me, what's become of my ship? [bites into an apple.] Har har har ha!

Jack

Now all that's left is to climb aboard Davy Jones's crocodile machine or whatever it's called. [to crew offscreen] What's the bloody thing called? Flying what..? Dutchman!

Jack

I shall help you find the compass if you'll do strange things to my dog. His name is Tim.

Gibbs

Let's put some distance between us and this island and head out to open sea.

Jack

Yes to the first and yes to the second but only insofar as we I'll just start that take again shall I?

Gibbs

Good idea.

The charge is conspiring to set free a man convicted of... [sighs]

I can't read my own writing. Crimes, thank you very much.

Lord Cutler Beckett

The charge is conspiring to set free a man legally lawfully I'm sorry I'm slightly confused about what version we're doing. Shall I say it or does Jonathon say it?

It's my line, dear.

Lord Cutler Beckett

Oh, sorry.

That's mine, bitch!

Jack

Are you certain? [loud creaking sound]..... [quietly] Sorry.

Jack

Why fight when you can negotiate? All one needs- [realizes a dreadlock is stuck in the jar of dirt] [Will cracks up laughing] Help?

There is a female presence on board, sir. All the men have felt her- [rest of the crew crack up laughing] No, they haven't felt her...

Jack

Your recolciliatory reacaliotory relalaltrltyyua LA. There, I said it, I feel better for it.

Gibbs

Again! Again!

Lord Cutler Beckett

Kill him!

Tia Dalma

If you want to brave the weird, and haunted shores at World's End, then... [tries to move, realizes her dress is stuck on a table] I'm stuck, sorry.

Tia Dalma

Y' have a touch of destiny about you, William… Turner.

Will

You know me?!

Tia Dalma

Would you like to "know" me?

Jack

There'll be no "knowing" while we're here.