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MASH

MASH quotes

44 total quotes

Col. Blake
Duke
Hawkeye
Hot Lips
Multiple Characters
Painless
Trapper John


View Quote Frank, were you on this religious kick at home, or did you crack up over here?
View Quote How do ya like them apples, Charlie?
View Quote I'm a fairy. A victim of latent homosexuality. I've turned into a fairy.
View Quote If a man isn't a man anymore... what's he got left that he should be living for?
View Quote It's a good thing you have a nice body, nurse, otherwise they'd get rid of you quick.
View Quote Let's give him a sexy scar, huh? Fantastic
View Quote No. No food. Sex. I want sex. Bring me some sex. [The others call for Storch, but Trapper John points at Hot-Lips] No, no, no, that one. Bring me that one over there. That one. The sultry bitch with the fire in her eyes. Take her clothes off! I want that one, yes. Take her clothes off and bring her to me now.
View Quote Oh come off it, MAJOR! You put me right off my fresh fried lobster, do you realize that? I'm going to go back to my bed, I'm going to put away the best part of a bottle of scotch... and under normal cir****stances, you being normally what I would call a very attractive woman, I would have invited you back to share my little bed with me you might possibly have come. But you really put me off. I mean you're what we call a regular army clown.
View Quote Oh, Frank, my lips are hot! Kiss my hot lips!
View Quote Oh, now damn it, Henry. Frank Burns is a menace! Every time a patient croaks on him, he says it's God's will or somebody else's fault.
View Quote Take care of the squirrels.
View Quote This isn't a hospital, it's an insane asylum!
View Quote Well, you know, Man o' War, after they retired him from racing, they put him out to stud. And he had, on an average, uh about a hundred and twenty, a hundred and thirty foals every year. And he lived to be thirty-six. And then when he died, they did an autopsy, and they found out that he was a raving queen.
View Quote Who am I? I am the pro from Dover, and this [Indicates Trapper John] is my favorite caddy.