David Abbot Okay, I was wasted. But I still shouldn't be seeing some little blonde control freak running around my apartment.
Most-quoted character in Just Like Heaven (2005): in 26 of its 61 quotes
Most scenes with: Elizabeth Masterson (15), Jack Houriskey (4), Darryl (2)
I'm just… I just wanted you to have your garden.
More lines from David Abbot
6 quotes David Abbot David Abbot Go away! You don't exist!
David Abbot Look, there are five other units here and not one person even remembers what you look like. Talk about being disconnected.
David Abbot You're like an A.M. radio that someone shoved into my head and I can't turn off!
David Abbot I'm, I'm sorry I said you were dead. Maybe you're not dead. Maybe you're just very… light.
David Abbot Uh, I don't think your sister's a very spiritual person.
Scenes with David Abbot
19 scenes David [The clerk at a new age bookstore helps David navigate the spiritualism section.]
Do you believe in this stuff?
Well, you don't… until you do.
So what kind of encounter have you had?
David Encounter?
Ectoplasm? Soniferous ether? I have a killer s?ance book if you're into communication.
David Communicating is not her problem.
David Are-are-are you here? Come on, I think you're here. [waits] Okay. I've got a hot, moist cup of coffee in my hand. There is no coaster on this table. I'm going to set it down on this lovely mahogany—
David Ah! We-we need to talk.
David Let me ask you, has anything, uh, dramatic happened to you recently?
Like what?
David I don't know, like… dying, maybe?
David I'm trying to help you face the fact that you are—
I'm not dead!
David Look around you. There should be a bright light nearby.
There's no light.
David Walk into the light, Elizabeth!
There is no light! I am not dead. I think I would know if I was dead. [looks down and notices a table bisecting her at the waist] What's happening to me?!
David You're DEAD!
All I know is-is when I'm not with you it's like I don't… exist. Oh, my God. Maybe I am dead.
David Oh, come on now. I'm, I'm sorry I said you were dead. Maybe you're not dead. Maybe you're just very… light.
Look, you have two realities to choose from. First one being that a woman has come into your life in a very unconventional way, and she happens to need your assistance.
David Right.
The second one is that you're an insane person, and you're sitting on a park bench right now talking to yourself.
David I think I prefer the first one.
[After downstairs neighbor Katrina flirts outrageously with David.]
You don't think she was completely un-classy and predatory?
David Those happen to be two of men's favorite things.
Manager
[An intangible Elizabeth coaches David in helping a collapsed restaurant patron.]
What's wrong with him?
It's a tension pneumothorax.
David I think it's a tension nemothaxer.
Pneumothorax.
David Pneumothaxer.
Pneumothorax.
David Pneuma… pneumathurman!
Never mind.
David Never mind!
David [The pair has located Elizabeth's comatose body in a hospital.]
Oh, my God, it's you. It's you, it's really you. You're, you're not dead, you're alive.
I know, David, but I'm in a coma. This is not good.
David Well, it's way better than dead!
David Come on, nothing happened.
What did you say to her?
David Um… that I was seeing someone.
Honestly?
David Well, I didn't mention that, uh, I was the only one who could.
David [Elizabeth's life support is due to be terminated shortly.]
Suddenly I know what I'm supposed to do. Because this time I can do something.
What are you talking about?
David Lizzie, when we first met, I kept saying you were dead. But it was me that was dead, and you brought me back. You saved me. And now it's my turn to save you.
How?
David I'm gonna steal your body!
Fine,fine. If she is really there tell me, tell me what I have behind my back. Rock, paper, or scissor.
Rock!
David Rock!
Scissors!
David Scissors!
Paper!
David Paper!
Rock, again!
David Rock,again!
David Are you flipping her off?
[Despite his doubts, Jack is helping to remove Elizabeth's body from the hospital.]
David, tell him thank you.
David Jack? We're really grateful.
I'm not doing it for you.
David Well, then why are you doing it?
Because someday, trust me, I'm gonna need help moving a body, and when that day comes, I don't wanna hear any shit from you.
David [on the phone with his realtor Grace]
Grace, this is David. The people who rented me this apartment, do you have their number?
Grace Why, is something wrong?
David No, I was just wondering about the previous tenant, that’s all.
Grace Well, the woman I was dealing with didn't really want to talk about it. Some family matter.
David So you think the tenant died?
Grace You’d better hope so, that’s the only way to get off this month by month thing and get a real lease.
David Well, that’s not exactly what I meant.
Grace Come on, David, grow up, it’s got a view, it’s got a fireplace, people would kill their grandmothers for a lot less in this city.
David [David's mobile phone rings]
Oh wow, who would want to call me? [answers it] Hello?
Grace David, it’s Grace. Well, you are the luckiest man in San Francisco.
David Thank you, why do you say that?
Grace You know the apartment you are renting, they are now willing to give you a nice long lease.
David How long a lease?
Grace Really long and I am going to bring it over and I will talk to you tomorrow.
David Wait, why now?
Grace Well it’s a real sad story, you know the tenant is in some kind of coma or something, and it is what it is, so they are going to pull the plug, but get this, they are going to throw in that couch you like. David?
[David hangs up on Grace, shocked.]
David [Elizabeth’s life support is due to be terminated shortly]
Suddenly I know what I'm supposed to do. Because this time I can do something.
What are you talking about?
David Elizabeth, when we first met, I kept saying you were dead. But it was me that was dead, and you brought me back. You saved me. And now it's my turn to save you.
How?
David I'm gonna steal your body.
[On the street, as they approach David's truck]
David, what are you thinking? You can't do this!
David Why can't I?
Because you'll go to jail.
David So what? If something happens to you, do you think I care where I'll be? At least this'll buy us a little more time.
David You know them. You'll talk me through it.
[David is trying to convince Jack that Elizabeth is with them]
If your friend's really behind me, ask her what I'm doing with my hand. Rock, paper, or scissors.
Rock!
David Rock!
Scissors!
David Scissors!
Paper!
David Paper!
Rock, again!
David Rock, again!
David Are you flipping her off? [angrily] You're flipping her off!
[Jack, slightly creeped out, nervously checks behind him.] (nervously)
What? How did you - okay, okay, sometimes people with mental or emotional disturbances can have psychic moments, all right? But even if she was real, do you know what you're risking for this woman?
David Yes!
WHY?
David BECAUSE I LOVE HER! (Calms down) I love her. (faces Elizabeth) I do. I love you.
[Despite his doubts, Jack is helping to remove Elizabeth’s body from the hospital.]
David, tell him thank you.
David We're really grateful, Jack.
I'm not doing it for you.
David Well, then why are you doing it?
Because someday, trust me, I'm gonna need help moving a body, and when that day comes, I don't wanna hear any shit from you.
Oh my God. David -
David I know, she’s pretty, right?
That’s really sweet, but we've gotta go.
No, that’s not it, this is her. This is the woman I set you up with, this is the woman you stood up that night!
David [surprised]
I-I was gonna meet Elizabeth?
And she didn't make it either, because she had an accident...[David turns to face Elizabeth]
David [surprised]
It was you? Is that it? Is that why?
David How do you know her?
I'm friends with her sister, Abby, we went out years ago.
I knew I'd seen him before...That’s J.J.!
David Jack is J.J.?
What did you just — No one's called me J.J. since college.
He’s older and hairier, but it’s him.
David He’s the one who tongued Abby at the wedding?
How the hell do you know that? Nobody knows that.
David It’s Elizabeth!
Oh-oh my god. She really is here, isn't she?
David I told you!
Well, let’s get her on the gurney, I don’t want them killing Abby’s little sister!
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