[Kumar is licking Harold to wake him up]

What the **** are you doing?! God!

Well, you were out cold, I figured if I started doing some gay shit you'd wake up.

Didn't we come here on a cheetah? Where's the cheetah?

It ran away. Listen, I got some bad news and some worse news.

Okay, give me the worse news first.

I was looking at some of the roadsigns, and it looks like the cheetah took us in a completely different direction.

What's the bad news?

Your laptop's completely destroyed.

[shouts]

How is that not the worse news?

[calmly]

The laptop situation really only affects you, whereas the White Castle situation affects us both equally.