Marlin If this is some kind of joke, it's not funny! And I know funny! I'm a clown fish!
Voiced by Albert Brooks 
Finding Nemo (2003) · 89 quotes
Finding Nemo (2003) · 89 quotes
2nd most-quoted character in Finding Nemo (2003): in 29 of its 89 quotes
Most scenes with: Dory (15), Nemo (3), Nigel (2)
I just can't afford anymore delays and you're one of those fish that cause delays. Sometimes its a good thing. There's a whole group of fish; they're called delay fish. No, of course I like you. It's because I like you, I don't want to be with you. It's a complicated... emotion.
More lines from Marlin
8 quotes Marlin Marlin It's like he's trying to speak to me, I know it!
Marlin No! I didn't come this far to be breakfast!
Marlin Look, you're really cute kid, but I don't know what you're saying!
Marlin I'm dead. I'm dead, I'm dead, I died, I'm dead.
Marlin Good feeling's gone.
Marlin There, there, there. It's okay, Daddy's here, daddy's got you. I promise I will never let anything happen to you... Nemo.
Marlin [to Bob the seahorse]
Don't tell me to calm down, Pony-boy!
Scenes with Marlin
20 scenesI had a tough time when my oldest went out on the drop off
Marlin They just gotta grow up some--THE DROP OFF?! They're going to the drop off?! What-what-what are-what are we, INSANE?! Why don't we just fry them up now and serve them with chips?!
Bob
Hey Marty, calm down.
Marlin Don't tell me to calm down, pony boy!
Bob
[pause]
"Pony boy"?
Ya know, for a clown fish, he really is not funny.
Ted
Pity.
Marlin Look! Already it's half empty!
Hmm. I'd say it's half full.
Marlin Stop that!
Marlin How many stripes do I have?
I'm fine
Marlin Answer the stripe question!
Three.
Marlin No! See?! Something's wrong with you! I have one, two... three? That's all I have?
Marlin No no no, he's my son. He was taken by these divers.
Anchor
Humans. Think they own everything. Probably AMERICAN!
AAAAH! Something's got me!
Marlin That was me, I'm sorry.
Who's that?!
Marlin Who's that? Who could it be?! It's me!
Are... are you my conscience?
Marlin [sighs, exasperated]
Yes. Yes, I'm your conscience. We haven't spoken for a while. How are you?
Meh. Can't complain.
Marlin Huh. Good. Tell me, Dory, do you see anything?
Marlin A light?
Yeah. I see a light. Hey conscience, am I dead?
Marlin No, no, I see it too.
It's so... [hypnotised] pretty...
Marlin [also hypnotised]
I feel... happy. Which is a big deal... for me.
I want to touch it...
Both
[She does; the light bobs quickly away]
Ooh...
Marlin Hey, come back. Come on back here. I'm gonna get you.
Come here.
Marlin [singing]
I'm gonna swim with you...
I'm gonna get you. I'm gonna get you.
Marlin [singing]
I'm gonna be your best friend...
Marlin [The light is attached to a terrifying angler fish, which looms into view.]
Good feeling's gone.
How about we play a game?
Marlin All right.
Okay, I'm thinking of something orange, and it's small...
Marlin It's me.
Right!
Marlin Me again.
All right, Mr. Smartypants...
Marlin Me. And the next one - just a guess - me.
Okay, that's just scary.
Marlin Will you just STOP IT?! We're in a whale, don't you get it?!
A whale?
Marlin A WHALE!! Because you asked for help, and now we're stuck here!
Marlin No, Dory! You're insane! You CAN'T. SPEAK. WHALE!
[the whale speaks to her]
Okay, that one was a little tougher. He either said "go to the back of the throat", or "he wants a root-beer float".
Marlin Of course he wants us to go there! That's EATING us!! [rubs his tail on the whale's tongue] How do I taste, Moby? Do I taste good?! [to Dory] You tell him I'm not interested in being lunch!
Okay. HeeEEEEE--
Marlin Stop talking to him!!!
He [the whale] says "It's time to let go!"
Marlin But, but, how do you know nothing bad will happen?
I don't!
Marlin But, but dude how do you know when they're ready?
Well you never really know you know, but when they know you'll know, ya know?
[Marlin and Dory see a whale]
Excuse me! Whoo-hoo! Little fella? Hello! [to Marlin] Don't be rude, say hi.
Marlin Heh, hello.
His son Bingo...
Marlin Nemo.
...Nemo was taken to...
Marlin Sydney.
...Sydney, yeah. And it's really, really important that we get there as fast as we can, so can you help us out? C'mon, little fella. C'mon! [claps her fins playfully]
Marlin Dory, I'm a little fella. I don't think that's a little fella.
[the whale makes a sound]
Oh, a big fella. Big... A whale... okay, Maybe he only speaks whale. [imitating the sound a whale makes] MwOOooo! WwwwEEEE... nEEeeeedd tOOooo FINNND hiIIiiss SONNNNN...
Marlin Dory? What are you doing?
CaaaAAAaaN yoooOOOOu... mMm...
Marlin Are you sure you speak whale?
...giIIIVe uuuus dirRECtiooons?
Marlin Heaven knows what you're saying!
Marlin [The whale swims off.]
See? He's going away.
CoooOOOOOOme bAAAAAAAack!
Marlin He's not coming back. You offended him!
Maybe a different dialect.
Marlin [She makes random whale sounds.]
Dory, this is not whale. You're speaking, like, upset stomach.
Maybe I should try Humpback.
Marlin No, don't try Humpback!
Marlin [Dory makes a new set of "whale" sounds.]
Okay, you actually sound sick!
Maybe louder, huh? RAH! RAH!
Marlin Don't do that!
Too much Orca. Didn't that sound a little Orca-ish?
Marlin It dosen't sound like Orca! It sounds like nothing I've ever heard! [sighs] Oh, just as well. He might be hungry.
Relax. Whales don't eat clownfish. They eat krill.
Krill
[A school of terrified krill swims past as the whale looms into view behind them.]
Swim away!
Oh, look! Krill!
Marlin Move, Dory, MOVE!!!
Marlin [The whale departs after taking Marlin and Dory to Sydney.]
ThaAAANnnnkKK yYYyoooOOOOOuuuuUUuu, SSSIIIrrrr!
Wow. Wish I could speak whale.
Seagull
[Hundreds of seagulls are surronding Marlin and Dory]
Mine.
[quiet and controlled]
Okay. Don't make any sudden moves. Hop inside my mouth, if you want to live.
Marlin Hop in your mouth, huh?! And how does that make me live?!
Because... I can take you to your son.
Marlin Yeah, right.
No! I know your son! He's small and orange, he has a gimpy fin on one side--
Marlin [jumping up]
THATS NEMO!!!
[Seagulls attack]
Hey, guys, wait up! [catches up to his friends] Whoa!
Tad
[Nemo and his friends gaze amazed at the open water]
Cool! [he, Nemo, Sheldon and Pearl look over the edge of the drop off] Saved your life! [pulls Pearl back]
Ahh! [inks] Awww! You guys made me ink!
Tad
[The others see the underside of a boat]
I know what that is. Oh, oh, Sandy Plankton saw one. He called… He said it was called, uh, a butt!
Wow! That's a pretty big butt.
Oh, look at me! I'm gonna go touch the butt! [sneezes] Whoa!! [Pearl, Tad and Nemo laughed at Sheldon; laughter] Oh, yeah? Let's see you get closer.
Okay. Beat that.
Tad
Come on, Nemo. How far can you go?
Oh, um, my dad says it's not safe.
Marlin Nemo, no!
Dad?
Marlin [pushes Nemo back to the edge]
You were about to swim into open water!
No. I wasn't go out---- But, Dad, no!
Marlin It's just a good thing I was here. If I haven't shown up, I don't know...
Sir, he wasn't gonna go!
Tad
Yeah, he was too afraid.
No, I wasn't!
Marlin This does not concern you, kids. And you're lucky I don't tell your parents you were out there. You know you can't swim well.
I can swim fine, Dad, okay?
Marlin No, it's not okay. You shouldn't be anywhere near here! Okay, I was right. You know what? We'll start school in a year or two.
Marlin Clearly, you're not ready, and you're not coming back until you are. You think you can do these things, but you just can't, Nemo!
[hurt by what his father said]
I hate you. [Marlin is shocked and visibly hurt at what his son just said]
Mr. Ray
♪ Theeeeeeere's... ♪ nothing to see. Gather, uh, over there. [The kids swim off to the side as he swims over to Marlin] Excuse me, is there anything I can do? I am a scientist, sir. Is there any problem?
Marlin You know, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt things. He isn't a good swimmer, and I just think that it's a little too soon for him to be out here unsupervised.
Mr. Ray
Well, I can assure you, he's quite safe with me.
Marlin Look, I'm sure he is, but you have a large class and he can get lost from sight if you're not looking. I'm not saying you're not looking...
Kathy
Oh, my gosh! Nemo's swimming out to sea!
Marlin [Nemo swims toward the boat] [gasps]
Nemo! [Nemo stops near a chain of an anchor on the boat] What do you think you're doing?! [Nemo looks up at the boat] You're gonna get stuck out there, and I'm gonna have to get you before another fish does! Get back here! [Nemo swims up the chain to the boat] I said, get back here, NOW! STOP!!! [Nemo reaches the boat's underside, then turns around to his father] You take one more move, mister! [Nemo holds his fin up] D-Don't you dare! If you put one fin on that boat... Are you listening to me?! Don't touch the boa.. [Nemo angrily slaps on the underside] Nemo!
Tad
[whispers]
He touched the butt.
Marlin [enraged; as Nemo starts swimming back to him]
You just paddle your little tail right back here, Nemo! That's right! You are in big trouble, young man! Do you hear me?! Big…! [As Nemo rolls his eyes while swimming back, a diver appears upwards out of nowhere right behind him, shocked] Big...
[Pearl screams while Tad and Sheldon cower] [turns around to see the diver, gasps, then screams, calling for help]
Ahhhh! Daddy, help me!
Marlin I'm coming, Nemo! [A second diver, dressed in a blue suit, appears upwards out of nowhere right in front of Marlin, blocking his path to the first diver and Nemo]
Mr. Ray
[Pearl, Sheldon and Tad scream] [as he protects the kids under his body]
Get under me, kids! [he and his students take cover]
Aah! Oh, no! [The first diver scoops him into a net, then swims back to the boat] Dad! Daddy!!!
Marlin [bumps a coral as he pants heavily while the second diver takes a picture with a camera, temporarily blurring him with its flash]
D'oh! Nemo! [pants as from his blurred point of view, the diver can be seen swimming away] Oh! Ugh! Nemo! Nemo, no! [as his view clears, he spots the divers swimming back to the boat] Nemo! [swims after them] Nemo! Nemo! No! [pants] No! [A propeller on the boat's underside spins, blowing him back, and the boat speeds away] Oh! [pants as he looks around, then sees the boat getting away] Nemo! Nemo! [pursues after the boat]
[On the surface, in an aerial camera shot, the boat speeds across the water. On board, the first diver opens a cooler, and puts Nemo, still in the net while flopping, inside, then closes it, just before a bump knocks him down]
Whoa! Hold on! [Unaware of him, he accidentally knocks his black and green scuba mask overboard, and it sinks into the ocean]
Marlin [Meanwhile, Marlin pants as he swims in a straight direction where the boat went. The ripples disappear]
Oh, no! No! No, it's gone! It's gone! No, no, it can't be gone! [swims to the surface, and looks around] No, no! Nemo! Nemo! Nemo!!! No! [dives underwater, then peeks out of the surface again] Nemo! Nemo! No! No, please, no! No, No! Has anybody seen a boat?! Please! A white boat! They took my son! My son! Help me, please!
Look out!
Marlin Whoa!
Aah!
Marlin [bumps on Dory to each other] [hits the stone]
Oof! [faints] Oooooh!!!!!
Oh. Um, sorry. Sorry! I didn't see you. Sir, are... Are you okay? There, there. It's all right.
Marlin He's gone.
It'll be okay.
Marlin No, no. They took him away. I have to find the boat!
A boat? Hey, I've seen a boat!
Marlin You have?
It passed by not too long ago.
Marlin A white one?
Hi, I'm Dory.
Marlin Where?! Which way?
Ooh! It went, um. This way! It went this way! Follow me!
Marlin Thank you! Thank you! Thank you so much!
No problem! [Marlin and Dory take off. The farther they go, Dory starts swimming away from Marlin. He chases after her until he gets head-rushed by her]
Marlin Hey! Wait!
Will you quit it?
Marlin What?!
I'm trying to swim here. What, ocean big enough for you some like that? You got a problem, buddy? Huh? Huh? Do you? Do you? Do you? You want a piece of me? Yeah, yeah, ooh, I'm scared now. What?
Marlin Wait a minute.
Stop following me, okay?
Marlin What are you talking about?! You're showing me which way the boat went!
A boat? Hey, I've seen a boat! It passed by not too long ago. It went this way! It went this way! Follow me! [swims out]
Marlin [stops Dory]
Wait a minute, wait a minute! What is going on?! You already told me which way the boat was going!
I did? Oh, no...
Marlin If this is some kind of practical joke, it's not funny! And I know funny! I'm a clownfish!
No, it's not. I know it's not. I'm so sorry. See, I suffer from short term memory loss.
Marlin Short term memory loss? I don't believe this.
No! It's true. I forget things almost instantly. It runs in my family. Well... I mean---- At least I think it does. [thinks] Hmm. Where are they? [looks at Marlin] Can I help you?
P. Sherman 42 Wallaby Way Sydney. Why do I have to tell you over and over again? I'll tell you again. I don't get tired of it.
Marlin Okay, all right.
Hu?
Marlin Here's the thing.
Uh-huh.
Marlin Uh... I just—— I think it's best if I... if I just—— if I carry on from here by… by myself.
Okay.
Marlin You know, alone.
Uh-huh.
Marlin Without, without—— Well, I mean, not without you. I mean, it's just—— But I don't want you... with me.
Marlin I don't want to hurt your feelings.
You want me to leave?
Marlin Well, I mean, not... Yes… Yeah. It's just... You know, I just can't afford anymore delays and you're one of those fish that cause delays. And sometimes, it's a good thing. There's a whole group of fish. They're... delay fish.
You mean... [whimpers] You mean you don't like me? [crying]
Marlin No, of course I like you. It's because I like you I don't want to be with you. It's a complicated emotion. Oh, don't cry. I like you.
School of Moon Fish
Hey, you! Lady, is this guy bothering you?
Um, I don't remember. Were you?
Marlin No, no, no, no, no. We're just, we're... Hey, do you guys know how I can get to P. Sh——
School of Moon Fish
Look, pal, we're talking to the lady, not you. Hey, do you like impressions?
School of Moon Fish
Okay. Just like in rehearsals, gentlemen. So, what are we? Take a guess.
Oh, oh. I've seen one of those.
School of Moon Fish
I'm a fish with a nose like a sword.
Wait. Wait. Um...
Marlin It's a swordfish!
School of Moon Fish
Hey, clown boy! Let the lady guess! Where's the butter?
Ooh-ooh-ooh! It's on the tip of my tongue…
Marlin Lobster!
School of Moon Fish
Saw that.
Marlin What?
Marlin Well, listen, fellas, thank you.
School of Moon Fish
Don't mention it! Just, uh, loosen up, okay, buddy?
Oh, you guys, you really nailed him. Bye.
School of Moon Fish
Oh, hey, ma'am. One more thing.
Yes?
School of Moon Fish
When you come to this trench, swim through it, not over it.
Trench... Through it, not over it. I'll remember. Hey, hey, hey! Hey! Hey, wait up, partner! Hold on! Wait, wait, wait! I gotta... I got to tell you something. Whoa. Nice trench. [echoing] Hello! Okay, let's go.
Marlin [pulls Dory back]
No, no. Bad trench, bad trench. Come on, we're gonna swim over this thing. [starts to swim over]
Whoa, whoa, partner! Little red flag going up. Something's telling me we should swim through it, not over it.
Marlin [comes back]
Are you even looking at this thing? It's got death written all over it!
I'm sorry, but I really, really, really think we should swim through.
Marlin And I am really, really done talking about this. Over we go.
Come on, trust me on this.
Marlin Trust you?
Yes, trust. It's what friends do.
Marlin Look. Something shiny!
Where?
Marlin Oh, it just swam over the trench! Come on , we'll follow it.
Okay. Boy, it sure is clear up here.
Marlin Exactly. And look at that, there's the current. We should be there in no time.
Marlin You wanted to go through the trench.
I shall call him Squishy and he shall be mine. And he shall be my Squishy. Come here, Squishy. Come here, little Squishy. [mumbles cutely to it and gets zapped] Ow!
Marlin Dory, that's a jellyfish!
Bad Squishy. Bad Squishy!
Marlin Shoo, shoo, shoo! Get away! [flicks the tiny jellyfish out of sight with his tail] Come here. Let me see that.
Don't touch it. Don't touch it.
Marlin I'm not gonna touch it. I just want to look. [grabs Dory's fin]
Hey! How come it didn't sting you?
Marlin It did. It's just that... [grabs Dory's fin second time]
Ow, ow, ow, ow!
Marlin Hold still. I live in this anemone and I'm used to these kind of stings. [grabs Dory's fin third time] Come here.
Ow, ow, ow!
Marlin It doesn't look bad, you're gonna be fine. But now we know, don't we? That we don't want to touch these again. Let's be thankful this time it was just a little one.
Marlin and Dory
[Marlin notices the big jellyfishes approaching and gasps. Marlin and Dory scream in terror.]
Ahhh!
Marlin Don't move. [looks around all the jellyfishes] This is bad, Dory.
Hey, hey, watch this. [starts jumping on the tops of jellyfish] Boing! Boing!
Marlin [gasps]
Dory! Dory!
Boing, boing, boing! You can't catch me.
Marlin Dory! Don't bounce on the tops! They will... not sting you? The tops don't sting you, that's it!
Two in a row. Beat that.
[after Marlin and Dory got sucked inside the Whale]
Here comes a big one. Whooo! [swims upside down] Come on! You got to try this!
Marlin Would you just stop it?!
Why? What's wrong?
Marlin We're in a whale! Don't you get it?!
A whale?
Marlin A whale! Because you asked for help, and now we're stuck here!
Marlin No! You're insane! You can't speak whale! I have to get out! [bumps into the whale's baleen] I have to find my son! [bumps again] I have to tell him... [bumps repeatedly] ...how, old, sea, turtles, are! [sobs and groans]
Woo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoooo! Hey. [looks at Marlin] Are you okay? [swims to Marlin] There, there. It's all right. It'll be okay.
Marlin No. No, it won't.
Sure, it will. You'll see.
Marlin No. I promised him I'd never let anything happen to him.
Huh. That's a funny thing to promise.
Marlin What?
Well, you can't never let anything happen to him. Then, nothing would ever happen to him.
Gurgle and Deb
[Nigel, Marlin and Dory both smile and flew straight to the dentist's office; clanging]
Ahhhhh!
Too loud! Too loud for me!
Darla Sherman
[first words]
Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
Find a happy place. Find a happy place, find a happy place!
Barbara
Darla, your uncle will see you now.
Darla Sherman
Rah! I'm a piranha. They're in the Amazon.
And a piranha is a fish, just like your present.
Darla Sherman
[giggling]
I get a fishy. Fishy, fishy, fishy.
[As soon as he picks up the plastic bag, he sees Nemo belly up.]
Oh, no. Poor little guy.
Sharkbait!
Darla
Yay! Fishy, fishy, fishy.
Um... Must have left your present in the car, sweetie. [laughs]
[Nemo opens one eye and winks at the Fish Gang. Everyone is surprised.] [overjoyed]
He's still alive.
He's not dead.
What's happening? Why is he playing dead?
He's gonna get flushed down the toilet. He's gonna get out of here!
Yay.
He's gonna get flushed.
What a smart little guy!
Nemo, no!
Marlin Where's Nemo? Where is he?
Dentist! Dentist!
He's over there!
Marlin What's a dentist? What is that?
Marlin [Sherman opens the trash can] [gasps]
Nigel, get in here!
I can't go in there.
Marlin Oh, yes you can. [grabs his tongue and pulls it forward, barging right into the dentist's office] CHARRRRRRRRRGEE!!!!!
[Darla starts screaming in horror]
What the...?! [shouts; while Nigel is attacking him inside] Darla, sweetie, look out! Steady, steady, steady. Hold still. Hold still! Easy, easy! Hold still! Nobody's going to hurt you!
Marlin [gasps looks and sees Nemo floating upside down. He thinks that his son was dead.]
Nemo.
Oh, my goodness.
[slight pauses; grabs Nigel; Darla continues screaming]
Gotcha! [Nigel flapping his wings] Keep down! [tried to Nigel push out the window]
Marlin Nemo!
OUT WITH YA! [slams the window] AND STAY OUT!
Daddy?!
Darla Sherman
[picks up Nemo, upside down]
Fishy? [starts shaking it] Fishy! Wake up! Wake up!!!
Oh, no!
Quick! To the top of Mount Wannahockaloogie!
Darla Sherman
Why are you sleeping?!
Hurry!
Bloat! [Bloat inflates, Deb, Bubbles and Gurgle pushes a little bit right] Ring of Fire!
Darla Sherman
[Jacques turns the Mount Wannahockaloogie on blast mode, it launches Gill out of the tank, flying. He lands flopping on Darla's head.]
Fishy! [screams, drops a bag with Nemo in it, which it hits the tray and splats water everywhere] Get it out!
Crikey! All the animals have gone mad! [hits himself into the x-ray machine and gets knocked out]
Darla Sherman
[screams]
Get it out! [screams]
Smack her in the head, would you?!
Go, Gill, go!
Darla Sherman
There's a fish in my hair!
Shark Bait... Tell your dad... I said... hi. [flops on the spoon]
[Philip Sherman groans, then gasps and puts Gill back in the tank]
He did it! [laughs and cheering]
Yay!
I'm so happy!
Is he gonna be okay, Gill?
Don't worry. All drains lead to the ocean.
Darla Sherman
[last words]
FISHY!!! [gets sprayed in the face with water]
[Nigel brings Marlin and Dory back to the ocean; all three saw only part of what happened in the dentist's office, so they believe Nemo is dead]
I'm... I'm so sorry. Truly I am. [flies away]
Marlin Dory, if it wasn't for you, I never would have even made it here. So thank you. [starts to swim sadly]
Hey, wait a minute. [swims in front of him] W-w-w-wait! Where are you going?
Marlin It's over, Dory. We were too late. Nemo's gone. And I'm going home now. [starts to swim]
No. No, you can't. [stutters] Stop! [Marlin stops swimming] Please don't go away. Please. No one's ever stuck with me for so long before. And if you leave... if you leave... I just, I remember things better with you. I do, look. P. Sherman, 42... Ugh. Forty... Two... [sighs] I remember it, I do. It's there, I know it is, because when I look at you, I can feel it. And-and I look at you, and I... And I'm home. Please... I don't want that to go away. I don't want to forget.
Marlin I'm sorry, Dory. But I do. [sadly swims away]
Other characters in Finding Nemo
Dory
Ellen DeGeneres
Nemo
Alexander Gould
Bloat
Brad Garrett
Gill
Willem Dafoe
Gurgle
Austin Pendleton
Crush the Turtle
Andrew Stanton
Peach
Allison Janney
Deb
Vicki Lewis
Jacques
Joe Ranft
Nigel
Geoffrey Rush
The sharks
Bruce
Barry Humphries
Bubbles
Stephen Root
Pearl
Erica Beck
Philip Sherman
Sheldon
Erik Per Sullivan
