Dungeons & Dragons: Honor Among Thieves (2023) quotes

View Quote Doric: I'm not doing this for the money. I'm doing this for people who took me in when no one else would.

View Quote Doric: What is it, exactly, that you bring to this?
Edgin: Me? I'm a planner. You know, I make plans.
Doric: You've already made the plan, so what value do you have now?
Edgin: If the plan fails, the existing plan, I make a new plan.
Doric: So you make plans that fail.
Edgin: No.
Holga: He also plays the lute.
Edgin: Holga, not relevant.

View Quote Edgin: [hears the horn that signals the High Sun Games] The Games have started. We're going to Plan C.
Simon: Oh, buttocks. What's Plan C?
Edgin: Plan C is we go back to Plan A. [turns and points to Simon] We're gonna attune to the helmet.
Holga: Why don't you just call it Plan A?
Edgin: Plan A has a stink on it.
Simon: [losing his temper] You know darn well I can't attune to the thing.
Edgin: That's not true! You couldn't attune to it. Look at me. Look at me! Huh? Do you remember that job in Loudwater? You couldn't spider-climb until Jolym sicked his dog on you. And when we robbed the spear of Aoth Fezim, your Stone Skin spell failed until the arrows were inches away. Even in Triboar, you flipped the gravity of the whole theater!
Doric: [amazed] You did?
Simon: [embarrassed] By accident. It was wild magic and that only happened because they were gonna kill me.
Edgin: Exactly! Look, you are at your strongest when you think you're at your weakest. But you deliver. [pats Simon on the cheek] You're gonna get into that vault, okay? Not because you can, but because you must.
Doric: I'm gonna keep chipping away. If I can get a quarter inch, I'll be able to squeeze through as a worm.
Edgin: As a worm! A-as a worm! Perfect! Do you see this? Now we have a Plan D if Plan C fails.
Holga: Isn't Plan D just Plan B again?
Edgin: Plan B has a stink too.
Simon: It all stinks.

View Quote Edgin: [referring to Xenk] Keep your guard up. I don't trust this guy.
Holga: Even though he's helping us?
Edgin: Ah, he's got something up his sleeve.
Xenk: The only thing up my sleeve is my arm.
Edgin: [whispering] How could he hear that?
Xenk': I hear that as well.
Edgin: I hate you. [Xenk smirks]

View Quote Edgin: [they can ask a revived corpse five questions before it dies again] Were you killed in the Battle of the Evermoors?
Revived corpse: Yes.
Edgin: Great! I mean, not for you. Sorry for your loss. [to Simon] Four more questions, right?
Revived corpse: Yes.
Edgin: No, no, no, that wasn't for you. [to Simon] Did that count as a question?
Revived corpse: Yes.
Edgin: Dammit! Only answer when I talk to you, okay?
Revived corpse: Yes.
Simon: Why did you say "okay?" at the end of that?
Revived corpse: I didn't. [lies back in its coffin, dead]
Edgin: Fantastic. Where's the shovel?

View Quote Edgin: [turns around to see Holga frozen in time] She's caught in a Time Stop! Counter it, Simon!
Simon: I can't! Sofina's too powerful! [he runs off]
Edgin: [he tries to run away but slips on a golden chalice, turns to Forge] Take the tablet. Keep Kira safe. [throws the Tablet of Reawakening to Forge]
Forge: [catches the Tablet of Reawakening] You have my word. [runs off]

View Quote Forge: [laughing as he walks into the room to find Edgin wrapped in tentacles by Sofina] You'd think you'd be able to distinguish between your own daughter and a 300-year old wizard. Don't worry, Kira's safe. Unlike me, she had no idea you were coming. I don't think she knows how tenacious you've become, huh? Look, Ed, uh... [sits down] I'm really sorry for the way things turned out. But I think if you were truly honest, you'd have to admit I can give Kira a better life. I hope you can take comfort in knowing that she's with the father she deserves. Now I'm in a pickle because...I don't wanna see you die. Which is why I'm gonna leave the room. [as he's about to leave, Edgin tries to something from behind a tentacle] What? [uses a handkerchief to remove a tentacle from Edgin's mouth]
Edgin: [gasps for a breath] If you're gonna kill us, at least let us die with dignity.
Forge: How do you mean?
Edgin: Put us in the High Sun Games. Give us a fighting chance.
Forge: That's not a chance. It's not a chance at all. I mean, even if you were to somehow survive the tournament, Sofina's gonna... [Sofina glares at him] Uh... I-it would be much, much better for you to die here than go to the Games.
Sofina: No. They defeated your men and mine. Let them fight in the arena. They deserve that much.

View Quote Holga: How 'bout this: we use the Hither-Thither staff to get into the vault.
Simon: No, I've explained this. You can't Hither-Thither into a room you can't see.
Holga: I'm not saying that. I'm saying we put the portal on something and then sneak that thing into the vault.
Edgin: Mm, the only thing going in that vault is treasure.
Holga: So we put the portal on some treasure.
Edgin: Forge did say the richest men in Baldur's Gate and Waterdeep are bringing loot to the city. They'll be traveling the High Road. We could catch one of their convoys.
Doric: There'll be dozens of guards.
Edgin: Yeah, but the guards will guarding against people taking things out of their wagon, not putting them in! Holga, I could kiss you!
Holga: Try it.

View Quote Holga: So she did become a deer.
Edgin: Only at the very end. [to Doric] Are you absolutely sure about Sofina?
Doric: I saw her markings.
Simon: No wonder I couldn't counter her Time Stop.
Edgin: Forge knew all along he's got my daughter in there with a Red Wizard.
Doric: The vault is protected by something called "Morty Caiman's Arcane Seal".
Simon: Mordenkainen?
Doric: Yeah, that's it.
Simon: [disbelief] Oh, pity!
Edgin: What?
Simon: If the vault has Mordenkainen's Seal, we're not getting in. It's impenetrable.
Holga: Can't you just open it with magic?
Simon: Okay, here we go. I hate how everyone thinks that you can solve any problem with magic. There are limits. This isn't some bedtime story. This is the real world.
Doric: So there's no way to open it?
Simon: Well, I mean, if I was one of the world's most powerful sorcerers, so no. Or if we had the Helm of Disjunction.
Edgin: [gets the idea] The what?
Simon: It's a helmet that disables all nearby enchantments. But it doesn't matter. That thing went missing ages ago. We're done. [gets up]
Edgin: [follows Simon] Huh? C'mon! What's the problem? We can find the helmet.
Simon: Even if we could, I couldn't use it without attuning to it, which I'm terrible at.
Edgin: Oh, you can do it. I know you can.
Simon: You saying that doesn't make it so.
Edgin: Yeah, but you saying it does.
Simon: But I can't.
Edgin: Yes you can.
Simon: But I won't.
Edgin: Just say it.
Simon: No!
Edgin: Ugh, fine. Can we just keep this between us? I don't wanna hurt the group's morale. [walks to sit back down]
Simon: What morale? [sits back down as well]
Doric: Holga knows where the helmet is.
Edgin: [looks at Holga] You do?
Holga: My tribe fought the Cult of the Dragon over it at the Evermoors. We can just ask them where it went.
Simon: That battle was a century ago. They're all dead.
Holga: So ask them with magic.
Doric: He just made a whole speech how he can't fix everything with magic.
Simon: [he admits it] Actually, that is something I can do. [Holga chuckles in approval, as if to say "I told you so."]
Doric: [shocked] You can bring back the dead?
Simon: I can't, uh, bring them back, but I have this token that lets me ask corpses some questions and then they go back to being dead.
Doric: Yuck.
Simon: Yeah, it's fairly horrible.
Edgin: It's fairly wonderful. We're off to the Evermoors. Thank you, Simon, for the drinks. [he and Holga get up]
Simon: Oh, what? No...
Holga: Just pay it with magic.

View Quote Kira Davis: [about Forge] I'm sorry I believed him.

View Quote Kira: A-a trip?
Forge: Yes. Something urgent has come up, but if we leave now, we'll be safe.
Kira: Safe from what?
Forge: [looks at unconscious guards] What is this?
Edgin: This is an ambush. On the boat you were gonna use to escape from Neverwinter.
Kira: Dad...?
Edgin: Hi, honey. [holds the Tablet of Reawakening] Hey, Forge, why don't you tell her what this is?
Forge: [shrugs] I don't know.
Edgin: It's the Tablet of Reawakening, Kira. It's the reason why I left you.
Holga: Your dad's been telling you the truth, bug. It's Uncle Forge who's been feeding you lies.
Forge: [laughs nervously] It's rubbish. It's just rubbish.
Edgin: Come with me, Kira. We'll go home, bring back Mom. We can be a family again.
[as Kira was about to board the boat, Forge grabs her by the shoulder]
Forge: You're not taking my money. [pulls out a knife and points at Kira] Put down the tablet and get off my ship. All of you. Now!
Edgin: Okay, okay, okay.
Kira: [panicked] What are you doing?!
Forge: It's alright. Shush, my darling, be quiet.
Edgin: It's going down. [puts the tablet down] Just don't hurt her.
Forge: See that, Kira? [referring to Edgin] Your father knows me. He knows I'm prepared to do terrible things to get what I want, even to those I care about most. [Holga spots a potato] In the end, that's all that separates the beggar...
[scene cuts to slow-motion, Holga throws the potato to Forge's face, causing him to let Kira go]
Holga: Nobody hurts my bug.

View Quote Kira: Why can't I come?
Edgin: Sorry, Kira, this one's too dangerous.
Kira: Then--Then you shouldn't go. We have everything that we need.
Edgin: Not yet. But this is the last one. Trust me. [hugs Kira and walks off]
Holga: Chin up, bug. We'll be right back. [walks off]

View Quote Simon Aumar: I'd sit too, but there's not enough room on the rock.

View Quote Sofina: For too long, I've endured the arrogance of Forge Fitzwilliam, the false charm, the quips. And just as I begin to purge this place of its living filth, you dare interpose. Now, as you die, rest assured it will not be the end, for you will forever suffer.
Edgin: Ugh! I'm sorry, your breath just smells like...old clothes. It's bad.
[Kira cuffs Sofina and reappears]
Sofina: What is this?
Simon: I countered your Time Stop. I got better.
Edgin: We had to distract you so Kira could slap on that cuff and so Doric could do this. [Doric turns into an owlbear and attacks Sofina] I think you got her. [Sofina wakes up; Doric pins her again and throws her into a wall]

View Quote Sofina: You know not the scope of my power!