HD Head Detective
Did you get a make on the vehicle?
D Detective
Yes, sir. They're driving an '84...sheep dog.
[spots a pair of skis on top of a woman's car]
Skis, huh?
That's a lot of luggage for a little vacation.
B Beth
Oh, I'm moving to Aspen. I've gotta get away from my boyfriend. He's such a klutz! Plus, my astrologer told me that I really should stay away from accident-prone guys. So, you know.
[rests hand on Beth's car's side mirror, which breaks] [hands mirror to her]
Here. It's a little loose.
Isn't this incredible? What more could two single guys ask for?
I swallowed a big June Bug while we were driving. I'm not really hungry.
[reading newspaper]
Mary Swanson will... hossst... a new-ul...
I mean, if one beautiful girl can rip us apart like this, then our friendship isn't worth a damn. Maybe we should call it quits right now.
You just tell me where to sign, bud.
Right on my ass right after ya kiss it!
Kiss it?! You kiss mine! Both cheeks, both lips! Right here! Mwah, Mwah, Mwah!!
Which one of you wants to get it first?
Over here. I was the one who got us into this whole mess. C'mon, shoot me.
No! Wait. Do me first. I stole your girl, Lloyd, I deserve it.
No, you don't. No, you don't!
Yes, I do! Yesterday was one of the greatest days of my life! Mary and I went skiing, we made a snowman, she touched my leg.
What's going on, Harry? Your name is "Harry", isn't it?
Yeah, she grabbed down at the lobby, explained what was up, then they slapped this bullet proof vest on me and gave me a gun.
But what if he shot you in the face?
[to detective]
What if he shot me in the face?
B Beth
That's a risk we were willing to take.
BC Bikini contestant
[bus pulls up, a girl comes out]
Hey, guys. We're going on a national bikini tour and we're looking for two oil boys who can grease us up before each competition.
You are in luck...there's a town about three miles that way. I'm sure you'll find a couple guys there.
BC Bikini contestant
Okay..thanks..
[bus pulls away]
Do you realize what you've done?! Hey! Wait!
[bus stops, and opens doors for them]
Y-you'll have to excuse my friend. He's a little slow...the town is back that way!
[nudges Harry]
You're it.
[nudges Lloyd]
You're it.
[nudges Harry]
You're it, quitsies!
Anti-quitsies. [nudges Lloyd] You're it! Quitsies, no anti-quitsies, no startsies!
Can too, double stamped it, no erasies!
Cannot, triple stamped it, no erasies, touch blue make it true. [puts his hands over his ears and sings]
No! No! You can't triple stamp a double stamp! You can't triple stamp a double stamp, Lloyd! You can't triple stamp a double stamp! LLOYD! LLOYD! You c--
Joe GUYS!!! ENOUGH!!
B Beth
The number's 555-...
(quietly and rapidly)
555-...
B Beth
905-- Wait a minute, that's my old number. (laughs) That is so weird how your mind just goes blank!
(screams while his left leg is on fire)
FOR GOD'S SAKES, JUST GIMME THE DAMN NUMBER!!!
B Beth
Okay, look. Uh, you're gonna get pushy, forget about it!
(she drives away)
