IM Iron Man
[First lines of the film] [bounces off a force field]
Shit!
CA Captain America
Language!
--
IM Iron Man
[after everyone else has reported from the battlefield]
Wait a second. No one else is gonna deal with the fact that Cap just said "Language"?
CA Captain America
I know! [hurls his bike through the front of a jeep] Just slipped out.
--
Thor [later, during another part of the battle]
Find the scepter. [Flies off]
IM Iron Man
And for gosh sake, watch your language.
CA Captain America
[to himself]
That's not going away any time soon.
[hoping to assuage Banner's guilt]
Thor, report on the Hulk.
Thor [pleased]
The gates of Hel are filled with the screams of his victims.
Thor [Natasha gives Thor a shocked look as Banner covers his face.] [chastened]
Eh, but not the screams of the dead, of course. No, no, uh, wounded screams. Mainly whimpering. Great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids, uh... and, uh... gout.
V1 Veteran 1
[At the party, a World War II veteran pesters Thor for some of his Asgardian mead]
I gotta have me some of that!
Thor Oho, no-no-no. See this, this was aged for a thousand years in barrels made from the wreck of Gronhill's fleet. It is not meant for mortal men.
V2 Veteran 2
Neither was Omaha Beach, blondie. Stop trying to scare us. Come on.
Thor All right. [Pours a shot of mead]
V2 Veteran 2
[Cut to the veteran being carried out of the apartment, impressively drunk] [Slurring]
Excelsior...
[The Avengers, their party over, continue to hang around, more loosely inhibited] [Discussing Mjolnir]
It's a trick!
Thor Oh, no, it is more than that.
Oh, "whosoever, be he worthy, shall haveth the power," WHATEVER, MAN! It's a trick!
Thor Well, please, be my guest.
Thor Yeah.
R Rhodes
[Clint gets up to try to lift Mjolnir]
Oh, this is going to be beautiful.
Clint, you've had a tough week. We won't hold it against you if you can't get it up.
[To Thor]
You know I've seen this before, right? [Tries to lift Mjolnir and can't; laughs] I still don't know how you do it!
Smell the silent judgment?
Please, Stark, by all means.
I'm never one to shrink from an honest challenge. It's physics. Right, so, if I lift it, I then rule Asgard?
Thor Yes, of course.
I will be reinstituting Prime Nocta. [Tries to lift Mjolnir and is unable to] I'll be right back
R Rhodes
[Cuts to Tony trying to lift Mjolnir again with his Iron Man hand. It then cuts to Tony and Rhodes both trying to lift it with their respective armor gauntlets]
Are you even pulling?
R Rhodes
Just represent! Pull!
[After the other Avengers have tried and failed to lift Mjölnir]
The handle is imprinted, right? Like a security code. "Whoever is carrying Thor's fingerprints," I think, is the literal translation.
Thor Yes, well, that's a very interesting theory. However, I have a simpler one. [Easily lifts the hammer and flips it with one hand] You're all not worthy.
No, how could you be worthy? You're all killers.
Sorry, I was asleep… Or… I was a dream.
[Tapping his phone]
Reboot Legionnaire OS, we got a buggy suit.
There was a terrible noise… And I was tangled in… in… strings… I had to kill the other guy. He was a good guy.
Wouldn't have been my first call. But, down in the real world we're faced with ugly choices.
Thor Who sent you?
[Replaying Tony's voice]
"I see a suit of armor around the world."
In the flesh. Or, no, not yet. Not this…chrysalis. But I'm ready. I'm on mission.
[After hearing Ultron refer to him as a sickness]
Aw, junior. You're gonna break your old man's heart.
Thor Nobody has to break anything.
Clearly, you've never made an omelette.
He beat me by one second.
Thor [Elsewhere, in the morning, the quinjet arrives outside a field. Clint, Nat, Tony, Thor, Steve and Bruce walk toward a farmhouse]
What is this place?
Let's hope. [with one arm still on Nat's shoulder, he opens the door, and leads the others inside] Honey? I'm home. [Laura, a pregnant woman with dark brown hair, appears holding art stuff] Hi. Company. Sorry. I didn't call ahead.
Hey. [she and Clint kiss]
This is an agent of some kind.
Gentlemen, this is Laura.
[waves]
I know all of your names. [chuckles as Tony waves]
Ooh. Incoming. [gasps as Lila, a young girl with braided pigtails, runs to Clint, followed by her brother, Cooper, an older boy with short hair]
[picks up Lila, hugging her]
Hi, sweetheart! [wraps his arm around Cooper's face, kissing his head] Hey, buddy! How are you guys doing? Look at your face!
These are… smaller agents.
Oh, my… [kisses Lila's cheek, then sets her down] …goodness!
L Lila
Did you bring Auntie Nat?
I'm sorry, that was odd. Thank you.
Thor, you helped create this?
Thor I've had a vision. A whirlpool that sucks in all hope of life and at its centre is that. [points to the Mind Stone]
Thor It's the Mind Stone. It's one of the six Infinity Stones, the greatest power in the universe unparalleled in its destructive capabilities.
Then why would you bring it here?
Thor Because Stark is right.
Oh, it's definitely the end times.
Thor The Avengers cannot defeat Ultron.
Why does your Vision sound like J.A.R.V.I.S.?
We reconfigured J.A.R.V.I.S.'s matrix to create something new.
I think I've had my fill of new.
You think I'm a child of Ultron?
I'm not Ultron. I'm not J.A.R.V.I.S.. I'm uh... I am...
I looked in your head and saw annihilation.
B Barton
Yeah. Her seal of approval means jack to me.
Thor Their powers, the holes in our heads, Ultron himself, they all came from the Mind Stone and nothing compared to what it can unleash. But with it on our side-
Is it? [to Vision] Are you... on our side?
I don't think it's that simple.
B Barton
Well better get real simple real soon.
I am on the side of life. Ultron isn't. He will end it all.
B Barton
Sakovia, he's got Nat there too.
If we're wrong about you; if you're the monster that Ultron made you to be...
What will you do?. I don't want to kill Ultron. He's unique, and he's in pain. But that pain will roll over the Earth, so he must be destroyed. Every form he's built, every trace he's built on the net. We have to act now, and not one of us can do it without the others. Maybe I am a monster. I don't think I'd know if I were one. I'm not what you are; I'm not what you intended. So there may be no way that you can trust me, but we need to go.
Thor [Vision holds Thor's hammer to him. After a brief, awkward pause, Thor takes his hammer and Vision walks off.]
Right... [pats Stark on the shoulder] Well done.
Three minutes. Get everything you need.
