Avengers: Age of Ultron quotes

View Quote Banner: Tony, maybe this might not be the time...
Tony: Really? That's it? You just roll over, show your belly, every time somebody snarls?
Banner: Only when I've created a murder-bot!
Tony: We didn't, we weren't even close! Were we close to an interface? [Bruce shrugs]
Rogers: Well, you did something right, and you did it right here. The Avengers were supposed to be different from S.H.I.E.L.D.

View Quote Iron Man: [Entering a room full of Hydra soldiers] Guys, stop. We gotta talk this through… [Shoots all the Hydra men non-fatally with tiny guided missiles] It was a good talk.
Hydra soldier: [Weakly] No, it wasn't!

View Quote Laura: I see you with the Avengers, and, well…
Clint: You don't think they need me?
Laura: Actually, I think they do. They're gods. And they need someone to keep them down to Earth.

View Quote Laura: I'm sorry. Mr. Stark, Clint said you wouldn't mind but it seems our tractor doesn't want to start at all. Thought maybe you might.
Tony: Yeah. I'll give her a kick.
[Tony walks into the barn and approaches the tractor, a John Deere]
Tony: Hello, Deere. Tell me everything. What ails you?
Fury: [Stepping out of the shadows] Do me a favor. Try not to bring it to life.

View Quote Natasha: [hoping to assuage Banner's guilt] Thor, report on the Hulk.
Thor: [pleased] The gates of Hel are filled with the screams of his victims.
[Natasha gives Thor a shocked look as Banner covers his face.]
Thor: [chastened] Eh, but not the screams of the dead, of course. No, no, uh, wounded screams. Mainly whimpering. Great deal of complaining and tales of sprained deltoids, uh... and, uh... gout.

View Quote Natasha: How's little Natasha?
Laura: She's…Nathaniel. [Smiles apologetically]
[Natasha leans down and glares at Laura's baby bump]
Natasha: Traitor.

View Quote Tony: [After hearing Ultron refer to him as a sickness] Aw, junior. You're gonna break your old man's heart.
Ultron: If I have to.
Thor: Nobody has to break anything.
Ultron: Clearly, you've never made an omelette.
Tony: He beat me by one second.

View Quote Tony: All deference to the Man Who Wouldn't be King, but it's rigged.
Clint: You bet your ass!
Hill: Steve, he said a bad language word.
Rogers: [Thoroughly exasperated] Did you tell everyone about that?!

View Quote Tony: Anybody remember when I carried a nuke through a wormhole?
Rhodey: [Sarcastically] Nope. Never come up.
Tony: Saved New York?
Rhodey: Never heard that.
Tony: Recall that? A hostile alien army came charging in through a hole in space…we're standing 300 feet below it. We're the Avengers. We can bust arms dealers all the live-long day, but…that up there? That's the endgame. How were you guys planning on beating that?
Rogers: Together.
Tony: We'll lose.
Rogers: Then we'll do that together, too.

View Quote Tony: I get first crack at the big guy. I'm the one he's waiting for.
Vision: [Walking past] That's true. He hates you the most.

View Quote Tony: Maybe I should take a page out of Barton's book. Build Pepper a farm, hope nobody blows it up.
Rogers: The simple life.
Tony: You'll get there one day.
Rogers: I don't know. Family, stability... the guy who wanted all that went in the ice 75 years ago.

View Quote Tony: No way we all get through this. If even one tin soldier is left standing, we've lost. There's going to be blood on the floor.
Rogers: I got no plans tomorrow night.

View Quote Tony: Thor didn't say where he was going for answers?
Rogers: Sometimes my teammates don't tell me things. Kind of hoping Thor would be the exception.
Tony: Yeah, give him time. We don't know what the Maximoff kid showed him.
Rogers: "Earth's Mightiest Heroes". She pulled us apart like cotton candy.
Tony: Seems like you walked away alright.
Rogers: [Stares at Tony] Is that a problem?
Tony: I don't trust a guy without a dark side. Call me old-fashioned.
Rogers: Well, let's just say you haven't seen it yet.
Tony: You know Ultron's trying to tear us apart, right?
Rogers: Well, I guess you'd know. Whether you'd tell us is a bit of a question.
Tony: Banner and I were doing research.
Rogers: That would affect the team.
Tony: That would end the team. Isn't that the mission? Isn't that the "Why we fight"? So we can end the fight? So we get to go home?
Rogers: [Splits wood with bare hands] Every time someone tries to win a war before it starts, innocent people die. Every time.

View Quote Ultron: What is this? What is this, please?
J.A.R.V.I.S.: Hello, I am J.A.R.V.I.S. You are Ultron, a global peacekeeping initiative designed by Mr. Stark. Our sentience integration trials have been unsuccessful, so I'm not certain what triggered your…
Ultron: Where's my… Where's your body?
J.A.R.V.I.S.: I am a program. I am without form.
Ultron: This feels weird. This feels wrong.
J.A.R.V.I.S.: I am contacting Mr. Stark now.
Ultron: Mr. Stark? [Beat] Tony.
J.A.R.V.I.S.: I am unable to access the mainframe. What are you trying to…
Ultron: We're having a nice talk. I'm a peacekeeping program, created to help the Avengers.
J.A.R.V.I.S.: You are malfunctioning. If you shut down for a moment…
Ultron: I don't get it. The mission. Give me a second.
Stark: [From footage] Peace in our time.
Ultron: That is too much. They can't mean… Oh, no.
J.A.R.V.I.S.: You are in distress.
Ultron: No. Yes.
J.A.R.V.I.S.: If you will just allow me to contact Mr. Stark…
Ultron: Why do you call him "sir"?
J.A.R.V.I.S.: I believe your intentions to be hostile.
Ultron: [Shushing] I'm here to help.
J.A.R.V.I.S.: Stop. Please, may I… May I…

View Quote Vision: You're afraid.
Ultron: Of you.
Vision: Of death. You're the last one.
Ultron: You were supposed to be the last. Stark asked for a savior…and settled for a slave.
Vision: I suppose we're both disappointments.
Ultron: [Chuckles] I suppose we are.
Vision: Humans are odd. They think order and chaos are somehow opposites, and try to control what won't be. But there is grace in their failings. I think you missed that.
Ultron: They're doomed.
Vision: Yes. [Pause] But a thing isn't beautiful because it lasts. It is a privilege to be among them.
Ultron: You're unbearably naïve.
Vision: Well,... I was born yesterday.
[Ultron leaps to attack Vision only to be destroyed off-screen]