My God! The Dukes are going to corner the entire frozen orange juice market!
Unless somebody stops them...
Coleman ...or beats them to it. [all turn and look at him] Egg-nog?
Most-quoted role: Coleman in Trading Places (1983), 7 quotes
Movies Coleman Coleman [offering Billy Ray a sip from his flask; they are both in Halloween costumes]
Would you like a sip of whiskey?
I do not drink, it is against my religion!
Coleman Religion is a good thing I say, taken in moderation.
What if I can't do this job, Coleman? What if I'm not what they expected?
Coleman Just be yourself, sir. Whatever happens, they can't take that away from you.
I had it, Marcus. I had it in my hand.
Brody What happened?
Guess.
Brody [chuckles]
Belloq?
Wanna hear about it?
Brody Not at all.
Brody They want you to get ahold of the Ark before the Nazis do and they'll be willing to pay handsomely for it.
And the museum? The museum gets the Ark when we're finished?
Brody [hesitates, knowing probably not]
Hell, yes.
Major Eaton
Doctor Jones, we've heard a lot about you.
Have you?
Major Eaton
Professor of Archeology. Expert on the occult and, how does one say it... obtainer of rare antiquities.
That's one way of saying it.
Colonel Musgrove You're definitely a man of many talents.
Major Eaton
And you studied under Professor Ravenwood at the University of Chicago.
Yes, I did.
Major Eaton
Do you have any idea of his present whereabouts?
Only rumors really. Somewhere in Asia, I think. I haven't spoken to him in ten years. We were friends once but we had a bit of a falling out, I'm afraid.
Colonel Musgrove Now, you must understand that this is all completely confidential.
I understand.
Colonel Musgrove Yesterday afternoon our European section intercepted a German communique that was sent from Cairo to Berlin.
Major Eaton
You see for the last two years the Nazis have had teams of archaeologists running around the world looking for all sorts of religious artifacts. Hitler's gone nuts on the subject. He's obsessed with the occult, and right now there's some kind of German archaeological dig going on in the desert outside Cairo.
Colonel Musgrove Now we have some information here but we can't make anything out of it and we thought maybe you could. "Tanis development proceeding. Acquire headpiece to Staff of Ra. Abner Ravenwood, USA."
The Nazi's have discovered Tanis...
Major Eaton
What exactly does this mean to you, this 'Tanis'?
Well, Tanis is one of the possible resting places of the Lost Ark.
Colonel Musgrove The Lost Ark?
The Ark of the Covenant. The chest the Hebrews used to carry the Ten Commandments.
Major Eaton
Wait a minute, you're talking about THE Ten Commandments?
Yes, the actual Ten Commandments. The original stone tablets that Moses brought down out of Mt. Heron and smashed, if you believe in that sort of thing. Didn't any of you guys ever go to Sunday school? The Hebrews took the broken pieces and put them in the Ark, and when they settled in Canaan they put the Ark in a place called the Temple of Solomon--
Brody [finishing Jones' sentence]
In Jerusalem.
Major Eaton
Where?
Well nobody knows where.
Brody However, an Egyptian pharaoh--
Shishaq.
Brody Yes. --invaded the city of Jerusalem in about 980 BC and he may have taken the Ark back to the city of Tanis and hidden it in a secret chamber called the Well of Souls.
Major Eaton
Well of Souls?
Brody However, about a year after the pharaoh had returned to Egypt, the city of Tanis was consumed by the desert in a sandstorm which lasted a whole year, wiped clean by the wrath of God.
Colonel Musgrove [pause]
Well, I see we've come to the right man. You seem to know all about this 'Tanis'.
No, Abner's the real expert. He did the first serious work on Tanis, collected some of the relics. It was his obsession really. But he never found the city.
Major Eaton
Frankly, we're somewhat suspicious of Mr. Ravenwood. An American being mentioned so prominently in a secret Nazi cable--
Brody Rubbish, Ravenwood's no Nazi!
Major Eaton
What do they want him for then?
Obviously the Nazis are looking for the headpiece to the Staff of Ra and they think Abner's got it.
Major Eaton
What exactly is the headpiece to the Staff of Ra?
Well the Staff is just a stick, I don't know, about this big, but nobody really knows for sure how high. It's capped by an elaborate headpiece in the shape of the sun with a crystal in the center. And what you did was you took the Staff to a special room in Tanis called the map room with a miniature of the city laid out on the floor. And if you put the Staff in a certain place at a certain time of day, the sun shone through here and made a beam that came down on the floor here. [pause] And gave you the exact location of the Well of Souls.
Colonel Musgrove Where the Ark of the Covenant was kept?
And that's exactly what the Nazis are looking for.
Colonel Musgrove What does this Ark look like?
There's a picture of it in here. [sets a huge book down on the table and opens it] That's it.
Major Eaton
Good God!
Brody Yes, that's just what the Hebrews thought.
Colonel Musgrove [pointing at the picture of the Ark in the book]
Now, uh, what's that supposed to be coming out of there?
Lightning. Fire. The power of God or something.
Major Eaton
I'm beginning to understand Hitler's interest.
Brody Yes, the Bible speaks of the Ark leveling mountains and laying waste to entire regions. An army which carries the Ark before it... is invincible.
Elliott Templeton [Lying on his deathbed, after suffering a stroke]
Life is full of ironies, isn't it, Darrell? You know... I spent my whole life... among the great names of Europe. Now I'm dying... And who comes to see me but... Well, I mean... An itinerant...
Fish packer?
Elliott Templeton Fish packer.
Elliott Templeton [Louisa and Isabel have arrived from America and are visiting him in his Parisian mansion]
This is my music room.
Oh, isn't that lovely?
Oh, what a beautiful piano!
Elliott Templeton Well, it's a spinet by Larande, late 18th century French.
It must have cost a fortune.
Elliott Templeton It did. My poor dear friend, the viscount de Corvence had to part with it at a slight reduction, but then, estates are so draining on one these days, don't you find?
And are all these things for sale?
Elliott Templeton My dear Louisa, this isn't a shop. Oh, I occasionally allow the odd piece to be torn from my grasp.
Elliott Templeton You know, if I may say so, Louisa, it makes perfect sense to me. All Americans should avail themselves of at least one season in Paris just prior to marriage. It curbs the itches which tend to rise a year or two down the connubial pike.
Elliot, don't be vulgar.
Elliott Templeton You know, that's always been my problem. People think I'm being vulgar when I'm being serious, and they think I'm being serious when I'm being vulgar.