Who Framed Roger Rabbit quotes

View Quote Eddie Valiant: Anybody know you're here?
Roger Rabbit: Nobody. Not a soul, except, uh--
Eddie Valiant: Who?
Roger Rabbit: Well, you see, I didn't know where your office was. So I asked the newsboy. He didn't know. So I asked the fireman, green grocerer, the butcher, the baker, they didn't know. But the liquor store guy; he knew.
Eddie Valiant: In other words, the whole damn town knows you're here! Get out!

View Quote Smart Ass: Search the place, boys, and leave no stone "interned".

View Quote Eddie Valiant: A ladies' man, eh?
Baby Herman: The problem is I got a fifty year old lust and a three year old dinky. Look, Valiant, the rabbit didn't kill Acme. He's not a murderer, I should know, he's a dear friend of mine. I tell ya Valiant, the whole thing stinks like yesterday's diapers. Look at this. The papers said Acme left no will. That's a load of succotash. Any toon knows Acme had a will. He promised to leave Toontown to us toons. That will is the reason he got bumped off.
Eddie Valiant: Has anyone ever seen this will?
Baby Herman: Ah, no. But he gave us his solemn oath.
Eddie Valiant: If you think that guy could do anything solemn, the gag's on you, pal.
Baby Herman: I just figured since you were the one who got my pal in trouble, you might wanna help get him out. I can pay ya.
Eddie Valiant: Save your money for a pair of elevator shoes!
[Pushes the stroller, knocks a woman over, Baby Herman's cigar falls to the floor]
Baby Herman: My stogie! Whaaaa-a-a-a-a-a! Whaaaa-a-a!

View Quote Angelo: Hey, I seen a rabbit.
Judge Doom: Where?
[Roger gasps]
Eddie Valiant: Ya see?
Judge Doom: Where?!
Angelo: He's right here in the bar.
[put his arm around an imaginary friend]
Angelo: Say hello, Harvey.
[the whole bar erupts in laughter]
Roger Rabbit: I told you so.

View Quote I love you more than any woman's ever loved a rabbit.

View Quote Bongo: [catches Eddie peeping through the dressing room keyhole, watching Jesica and Mr. Acme playing patty-cake] What do you think you're doin', chump?
Eddie: Who are you calling a chump, chimp?
[Eddie gets thrown out]
Bongo: And don't lemme catch your peepin' face around here again! Got it?!
[slams the door]
Eddie: [lifts his arms to scratch his armpits] OOGA BOOGA!

View Quote [while putting on a large black rubber glove] Since I've had Toontown under my jurisdiction my goal has been to rein in the insanity, and the only way to do that is to make Toons respect--[lets the glove snap back onto his arm]--the law.

View Quote (calliope begins playing "The Merry Go Round Broke Down")
Eddie: Now Roger is his name/And laughter is his game/Come on you dope, untie his rope/And watch him go insane.
(does slapstick pratfalls to make the weasels laugh)
Jessica Rabbit: He's lost his mind.
Roger Rabbit: I don't think so.
Eddie: This singing's not my line/It's tough to make a rhyme/If I get stuck, I'm out of luck--
Jessica: I'm running out of time!
Eddie: Thanks!
(more pratfalls; weasels start dying of laughter)
Roger Rabbit: Hey, Eddie, keep it up! You're killing 'em! You're slaying 'em! You're knocking 'em dead!
Eddie: I'm through with taking falls/And bouncing off the walls/Without that gun I'd have some fun/I'd kick you in the-- *gets hit in head with vase*
Roger: Nose!
Smart Ass: Nose? That don't rhyme with walls!
Eddie: No, but this does!
(kicks Smart Ass in the groin, sending him flying, screaming, into the Dip Mixer, which then dissolves him)

View Quote R.K. Maroon: How much do you know about show business, Mr. Valiant?
Eddie Valiant: Only that there is no business like it, no business I know.
R.K. Maroon: Yeah. And there's no business more expensive. I'm 25 grand over budget on the latest Baby Herman cartoon. You saw the rabbit blowing his lines. He can't keep his mind on his job. You know why?
Eddie Valiant: One too many refrigerators dropped on his head?
R.K. Maroon: Nah, he's a toon. You can drop anything you want on his head, he'll shake it off. But break his heart, goes to pieces just like you and me.

View Quote R.K. Maroon: What are you going to do to me, Valiant?
Eddie Valiant: I'm going to listen to you spin the Cloverleaf scenario; the story of greed, sex and murder. And the parts that I don't like, I'm going to edit out.
R.K. Maroon: You got it all wrong, I'm a cartoon maker, not a murderer!
Eddie Valiant: Everybody's gotta have a hobby.

View Quote Put that gun down, you buck-toothed fool!

View Quote Daffy Duck: I've worked with a lot of withe-quackers-s, but you are des-s-picable!
Donald Duck: Doggone stupid little... that did it! Wha-a-a-a-gh!
Daffy Duck: This-s is-s the las-s-t time I work with s-someone with a s-speech impediment!
Donald Duck: Oh, yeah?!
[Donald Duck shuts Daffy in a piano]
Daffy Duck: This-s means-s war...

View Quote Roger Rabbit: Okay, nobody move! All right, weasel, grab some sky or I'll let the judge have it! You heard me, I said drop it!
Jessica Rabbit: Roger, darling!
Roger Rabbit: That's right, my dear. I'd love to embrace you, but first, I have to satisfy my sense of moral outrage!
Judge Doom: Put that gun down, you buck-toothed fool!
Roger Rabbit: That's it, Doom. Give me another excuse to pop you full of lead. So you thought you could get away with it, didn't you? Ha! We toons may act idiotic, but we're not stupid. We demand justice. Why, the real meaning of the word probably hits you like a "ton of bricks"!
[a ton of bricks falls on Roger]
Jessica Rabbit: Roger! Roger, say something!
Roger Rabbit: Look, stars! Ready when you are, Raoul.
Judge Doom: Tie the lovebirds together.

View Quote We'll see to him later, but right now I feel like dispensing some justice. Bring me some dip.

View Quote 14K. First generation Chinese-American, tenth generation Triad. His father sent him to business school, and he's the only man in here who holds a degree from MIT. He's killed four men off the track.