“You want God to laugh, you tell him your plans.” – Jed, Willy's Wonderland ... Movie Quotes Database

Jed: [to the Janitor] You want God to laugh, you tell him your plans. [laughs]
Tex: [to the Janitor] Howdy there, partner. My name is Tex, same as the state. Got the handle Macadoo. Welcome to Willy’s Wonderland.
Jed: Yeah, he don’t talk much.
Tex: And I respect that. I enjoy a man of few words. [Janitor looks at the graffiti] Well, business is not what it used to be, but I am fixing to reopen and make Willy’s better than ever. Anyway, enough horseshit. Here’s my offer. You spend the night cleaning Willy’s Wonderland and I will pay to have your car fixed. I go on in tomorrow, you come out of there, and your ride will be ready for you right there. Deal? [The Janitor stares at the "Willy's Wonderland" sign] If not, I got places to be. [Tex chuckles] All right. All right. [He chuckles] Let’s go inside.
Jed: [to The Janitor] Good luck, mister.
[The door squeaks as Tex and the Janitor enter the restaurant]
Tex: Watch your step. Check this out. [He turns on the T.V.]
Willy Weasel: [in a commercial] Hey, kids, it’s Willy the Weasel. Welcome to my wonderland. Come on down and meet the gang. We’ve got Arty the Alligator, Siren Sara, Cammy the Chameleon, Gus Gorilla, Knighty Knight, Ozzie the Ostrich, and Tito the Turtle.[singing with other animatronics] It’s your birthday, so let’s party, everyone. It’s your birthday and we want you to have fun. It’s your birthday, so let’s party, everyone.
Tex: We had some great times. Kids laughing, smiling, eating hot dogs, opening presents. You know the story, right? Well, some of these little bastards start crawling over the characters, they get hurt. A couple of lawsuits later from Mommy Safety Organizations and wham, bam, thank you, ma’am, we’re out of business. Shut us right down. [opens the janitor's closet] Damn thing always gets jammed. [sighs, turning on the light] Yeah. This stuff oughta do the trick. Broom, mop, bucket, drain snake, Windex, rags, whatever you need, we got it. [presents a Willy's Wonderland shirt] Oh, lookee here. Congratulations. You are officially on staff. [sighs] Well, pal, it’s gonna be dark soon. I’ll be back in the morning with that car of yours dapper and ready to drive or my name is not Tex Macadoo. [chuckles] Help yourself to whatever you can find in the kitchen. It’s on the house. And be sure to take breaks. Always good to pace yourself. That’s it. Good luck.

Jed : [to the Janitor] You want God to laugh, you tell him your plans. [laughs] Tex : [to the Janitor] Howdy there, partner. My name is Tex, same as the state. Got the handle Macadoo. Welcome to Willy’s Wonderland. Jed : Yeah, he don’t talk much. Tex : And I respect that. I enjoy a man of few words. [Janitor looks at the graffiti] Well, business is not what it used to be, but I am fixing to reopen and make Willy’s better than ever. Anyway, enough horseshit. Here’s my offer. You spend the night cleaning Willy’s Wonderland and I will pay to have your car fixed. I go on in tomorrow, you come out of there, and your ride will be ready for you right there. Deal? [The Janitor stares at the "Willy's Wonderland" sign] If not, I got places to be. [Tex chuckles] All right. All right. [He chuckles] Let’s go inside. Jed : [to The Janitor] Good luck, mister. [The door squeaks as Tex and the Janitor enter the restaurant] Tex : Watch your step. Check this out. [He turns on the T.V.] Willy Weasel : [in a commercial] Hey, kids, it’s Willy the Weasel. Welcome to my wonderland. Come on down and meet the gang. We’ve got Arty the Alligator, Siren Sara, Cammy the Chameleon, Gus Gorilla, Knighty Knight, Ozzie the Ostrich, and Tito the Turtle. [singing with other animatronics] It’s your birthday, so let’s party, everyone. It’s your birthday and we want you to have fun. It’s your birthday, so let’s party, everyone. Tex : We had some great times. Kids laughing, smiling, eating hot dogs, opening presents. You know the story, right? Well, some of these little bastards start crawling over the characters, they get hurt. A couple of lawsuits later from Mommy Safety Organizations and wham, bam, thank you, ma’am, we’re out of business. Shut us right down. [opens the janitor's closet] Damn thing always gets jammed. [sighs, turning on the light] Yeah. This stuff oughta do the trick. Broom, mop, bucket, drain snake, Windex, rags, whatever you need, we got it. [presents a Willy's Wonderland shirt] Oh, lookee here. Congratulations. You are officially on staff. [sighs] Well, pal, it’s gonna be dark soon. I’ll be back in the morning with that car of yours dapper and ready to drive or my name is not Tex Macadoo. [chuckles] Help yourself to whatever you can find in the kitchen. It’s on the house. And be sure to take breaks. Always good to pace yourself. That’s it. Good luck.