Loki quotes from Thor: Ragnarok (2017)

You know that nothing will stop Mjölnir as it returns to my hand. Not even your face!

You've gone quite mad! You...you'll be executed for this!

Then I'll see you on the other side, brother!

ALRIGHT! I yield!

Behold! Thor...Odinson-

No, no! [Turns and glares at Skurge] You had one job. Just the one!

Where’s Odin?

You just couldn't stay away, could you? Everything was fine without you. Asgard was prospering. You've ruined everything. Ask them.

Where’s Father? Did you kill him?

You had what you wanted. You had the independence you asked for. [Thor presses his hammer against Loki’s chest] Whoa, whoa, whoa! Okay! I know exactly where he is.

So Earth has...wizards now, huh? [goes to put the piece back, but accidentally knocks more off. He awkwardly tries to put the relic back together]

I prefer the term "Master of the Mystic Arts". You can leave that now.

All right, wizard. Who are you and why should I care?

My name is Dr. Stephen Strange, and I have some questions for you. Take a seat.

Tea?

I don't drink tea.

What do you drink?

Not tea.

So, I keep a watch list of individuals and beings from other realms that may be a threat to this world. Your adopted brother, Loki, is one of these beings.

He's a worthy inclusion.

Then why bring him here?

We're looking for my father.

So, if I told you where Odin was, all parties concerned would promptly return to Asgard?

Promptly.

Great. Then I'll help you.

If you knew where he was, why didn't you call me?

I have to tell you, he was adamant that he didn’t want to be disturbed. Your father said he had chosen to remain in exile. And you don't have a phone.

No, I don't have a phone, but you could have sent an electronic letter. It's called an email.

Yeah. Do you have a computer?

No. What for?

Uh-huh.

Anyway, my father is no longer in exile. So if you could tell me where he is, I can take him home.

Gladly. He's in Norway. [they go to a bookshelf and Strange flips through mystic books] I'm just seeing whether this incantation requires any Asgardian modifications. Nope. We don't need that.

Will you stop doing that?

I need just one strand of your hair.

Let me explain something. My hair is not to be meddled with. [Strange rips out one of his hairs] Agh!

We could have just walked.

He's waiting for you.

All right.

Don't forget your umbrella.

Oh yes. [Motions his hand for the umbrella. There is the sound of crashing and breaking glass as it damages the New York Sanctum on its way to him. Strange rolls his eyes in irritation] Sorry. [The umbrella finally comes and he removes some shattered glass from it] There we go. I suppose I'll need my brother back.

Hmm? Oh, yeah. Right.

I have been falling for thirty minutes!!!

You can handle him from here.

Yes. Of course. Thank you very much for your help.

Good luck.

"Handle me"? Who are you? [Pulls out his blades]

Loki...

You think you're some kind of sorcerer?! Don't think for one minute, you second-rate –

Alright. Buh-bye! [Sends Thor and Loki through a portal]

Hela

So he's gone. That's a shame, I would have liked to have seen that.

You must be Hela. I'm Thor, son of Odin.

Hela

Really? You don't look like him.

Perhaps we can come to an arrangement?

Hela

You sound like him. Kneel.

Beg your pardon?

Hela

Kneel, before your Queen.

Oho, I don't think so. [Thor hurls Mjölnir at her, only for Hela to catch it in one hand] It's not possible!

Hela

Darling, you have no idea what's possible!
[Hela easily crushes Mjölnir's head]

Time works real different around these parts. On any other world, I'd be, like, millions of years old. But here on Sakaar.... [Beholds himself] In any case, you know this, ah, this, ah... you call yourself the "Lord of Thunder"?

God of Thunder. [Whispering to Loki] Tell him.

... I've never met this man in my life.

He's my brother!

Adopted.

Is he any kind of a fighter?

Heh...heh. You take this thing out of my neck and I'll show you!

Now, listen to that, he's threat-threatening me! Hey, Sparkles! Here's the deal: You want to get back to "Ass-place," "Ass-berg..."

As–GARD!

... Any contender who defeats my champion... their freedom they shall win.

FINE! Then point me in the direction of whoever's arse I have to kick!

That's what I call...a contender! That direction would be, would be this way, Lord.

Loki!

Hey, big guy. Sun's getting real low. I don't want to hurt you anymore...there –

YES! That's how it feels! [To the Grandmaster] I'm just a huge fan of the sport.

You're a Valkyrie? I thought the Valkyrie all died gruesome deaths?

Chose your next words wisely.

I'm terribly sorry, must be a very painful memory.

Loki, I thought the world of you. I thought we were going to fight side-by-side forever, but at the end of the day, you're you and I'm me. I don't know, maybe there's still some good in you. But let's be honest: our paths diverged a long time ago.

Yeah. It's probably for the best that we never see each other again.

Its what you always wanted. [He claps Loki on the shoulder.

Hey, let's do "Get Help".

What?

"Get Help".

No.

Come on, you love it.

I hate it!

It's great! It works every time.

It's humiliating!

You got a better plan?

No.

We're doing it.

We are not doing "Get Help"!

GET HELP! Please! My brother's dying! Get help! Help him! [He chucks Loki at the guards, knocking them unconscious.] Ahh, classic!

Still hate it! It's humiliating!

Well, not for me, it's not!

Korg

Hey, man, I'm Korg. We're gonna get outta here on that big spaceship. Wanna come?

Well, it seems that you are in dire need of leadership.

Korg

Thank you!

I think we should disband the Revengers.

Hit her with a lightning blast.

I just hit her with the biggest lightning blast in the history of lightning! It did nothing!

We just need to hold her off until everyone's on board.

It won't end there. The longer Hela's on Asgard, the more powerful she grows. She'll hunt us down. We need to stop her here and now.

So what do we do?

I'm not doing "Get Help".

Asgard's not a place, it's a people. Loki, this was never about stopping Ragnarök, this was about causing Ragnarök. Surtur's crown; the vault. It's the only way.

Bold move, Brother. Even for me. [Runs off]

Shall we?

After you.

Do you really think it's a good idea to go back to Earth?

Yes, of course. People on Earth love me, I'm very popular.

Let me rephrase that. Do you really think it's a good idea to bring me back to Earth?

Probably not, to be honest. I wouldn't worry, brother. I feel like everything's going to work out fine.
[Sanctuary II, a ship owned by Thanos, hovers over the Statesman.]

Surprise.

Ow!

Just making sure.

Loki, I thought the world of you. I thought we were going to fight side-by-side forever, but at the end of the day, you're you and I'm me. I don't know, maybe there's still some good in you. But let's be honest: our paths diverged a long time ago.

Yeah. It's probably for the best that we never see each other again.

It's what you always wanted. [He claps Loki on the shoulder.] Hey, let's do "Get Help".

What?

"Get Help".

No.

Come on, you love it.

I hate it!

It's great! It works every time.

It's humiliating!

You got a better plan?

No.

We're doing it.

We are not doing "Get Help"!

GET HELP! Please! My brother's dying! Get help! Help him! [He chucks Loki at the guards, knocking them unconscious.] Ah, classic!

Still hate it! It's humiliating!

Well, not for me, it's not!