Reginald Scout quotes from Stuart Little (1999)

Taxi! What does a mouse have to do to get a cab in this city?

There's something you'll never be able to give him, because you're human. No offence!

Fairy tales are made-up stories, Stuart. This is real. This is about where you belong.

I'm gonna miss that car.

Stuart, wake up.

Stuart

Huh?

Get dress.

Stuart

Why?

Uh, we’re taking you for a ride.

Stuart

Where we’re going?

Some friends of ours have gathered just to meet you.

Stuart

A gathering? What should I wear?

It doesn’t matter. Wear anything.

Stuart

Is it formal?

Just put something on!

Stuart

Why's Mom crying? Mom? I'm not angry at you for putting me up for adoption.

Stuart

And now that I'm a Stout again, I'll always be here to take care of you. Because that's what families do. Mom, they, they take care of each other.

Ow!

TELL HIM THE TRUTH!!

George and Stuart

Little high, Little low!

Little hey, Little ho!

Frederick, look at them.

Uncle Crenshaw

You know what? This calls for a picture.

What's wrong?

Uncle Stretch

Well, It's just... you four look great together.

Stuart

This is the happiest moment of my life. I feel 10 inches tall.

I'll get that.

Mr. Little.

Yes?

Down here. Very sorry to disturb you at your lovely abode.

I hope we're not intruding.

My name's Reginald Stout. This is my wife, Camille.

An extreme pleasure.

We're looking for Stuart.

Are you friends of his?

Well, not exactly.

Fellow yachtsmen?

Guess again.

Reggie, just tell them.

We're his parents.

Reggie, stop it! It's so good to see you again, Stuart. There's so much we have to catch up on.

Stuart

Why didn't you want me?

Stuart, it shames me to say this, but you weren't born into a prosperous home.

That's right. We couldn't feed you, dear.

George

Couldn't feed him? How much could he eat?

George, please.

Letting you go was the toughest choice we ever made.

Stuart

It was?

Yes. But now we can be a family again.

Absolutely. Are these salted?

Dear. The children.

Uh, yeah. George, Stuart, I think we need to talk to the Stouts alone.

George

Don't worry. Mom and Dad will take care of it.

Mr. and Mrs. Stout, I'm afraid there's been a mistake.

Right.

Stuart can't leave with you. He's...

One of the family.

Exactly.

You may feel like he's family, but he'll never really be family.

You may not realize it, but I'm sure he does.

There's something you'll never be able to give him, because you're human. No offence!

It's a place that you'll never be able to fill.

An empty space.

Stuart

Mom... Dad, you want me to leave?

No.

Oh, dear, we just want what's best for you.

George

But Stuart lives here.

George, come on. This is hard for all of us.

George

This stinks!

Stuart

I don't understand. I thought I was in a fairy tale.

Fairy tales are made-up stories, Stuart. This is real. This is about where you belong.

Please come home, Stuart. Your real home.

You're gonna love it, son. We live on a golf course! We look right over the ninth fairway!

It's beautiful.

Beautiful.

Hey, taxi! What's a mouse have to do to get a cab in this city?

Stuart

You'll speak to George for me, won't you? I'd hate to say goodbye to a basement door.

Of course.

Taxi! Yo, taxi! Time to go, Stuart!

Stuart

Well, goodbye.

We love you.

Stuart

Ah, yeah. I love you too, Mom... Mrs. Little.

Boy, that looks heavy. You need some help with that? Camille?

Oh.

Frederick, let's do something.

What?

Let's just make them go away. We're bigger than they are. We'll say, "Go. Shoo". We'll scare their little whiskers off.

Eleanor, you're not being rational.

Rational, shmmational. Something about this is not right. I just know it.

Look at them. They just fit.

So what? I have shoes that fit and I hate them! As Stuart's mother...

But you're not. She is.

George

Stuart! Wait!

Stuart

George?

George

I want you to have this.

Stuart

No, George. Not the roadster, George. You love this car. I couldn't.

George

I want you to.

Stuart

Thanks, George.

George

I wish you didn't have to go. I'm gonna miss you.

Stuart

I'll miss you too, George.

When the moon hits your eye. / Like a big pizza pie. / That's amore!

Sing with me, Stuie.

When the world seems to shine. / Like you had too much wine. / That's amore!

You'll have to tell me your favorite foods so I can fix them for you.

What for? You can't cook.

But I can learn. We're a family now. And there's a lot of adjustments we'll have to make. Right, Reggie?

Right, Camille. Well, here we are, Stuie, the family home.

The family home.

Mind you, this is just our summer place. Winter time, we live in a crawl space above a delicatessen. You like corned beef, Stuie?

Stuart

How's it prepared?

Prepared? It drops out of a fat guy's mouth, we grab it and run.

Stuart

Sounds like an acquired taste.

Acquired taste? I love this kid!

Your new bedroom, Stuart.

We hope you like it. Well, good night. Sleep tight. Don't let the bedbugs bite. I'm serious about those bedbugs. Keep an eye open.

It's very kind of you to check on us like this.

Mrs. Keeper

Well, actually, I had something to tell you. But first, how are things going?

Oh, it's been difficult.

Mrs. Keeper

Difficult?

No, very difficult.

Mrs. Keeper

Very difficult?

Worse.

Mrs. Keeper

Worse than very difficult?

Yes, It's been almost...

Unbearable.

Just the word I was looking for.

Mrs. Keeper

Oh. Maybe this isn't a good time then. You see, I came over to give you some news.

What type of news?

Mrs. Keeper

Uh, they had an accident.

Who?

Mrs. Keeper

Stuart's parents.

Oh, my goodness. Well, are they all right?

Mrs. Keeper

No. They didn't make it.

Oh, no. Oh, my....

What happened?

Mrs. Keeper

Well, apparently, they were grocery shopping, canned-food aisle. There was an unsteady pyramid of cans and it collapsed. Took three bag boys to dig them out. They had to identify them by their dental records.

Oh, how horrible!

Mrs. Keeper

Cream of mushroom soup. Two-for-one sale. That's a very heavy soup.

How is Stuart taking it?

Mrs. Keeper

Well, he doesn't know.

You mean no one's told him?

Mrs. Keeper

Does he have to know?

Well, six months after they don't come back from shopping, wasn't he gonna wonder where they went?

Mrs. Keeper

But they've been gone for years.

Years? How is that possible?

Mrs. Keeper

Because they died years ago. Which part is confusing you?

Stuart's parents came and took him away three days ago.

Mrs. Keeper

Three days ago? Stuart's parents died in a tragic cream-mushroom-soup incident years ago. I just told you.

Dear, we have to take this up with the police.
Snowbell Hmm?

Stuart, wake up.

Stuart

Huh?

Get dressed.

Stuart

Why?

Uh, we're taking you for a ride.

Stuart

Where are we going?

Some friends of ours have gathered just to meet you.

Stuart

A gathering? What should I wear?

It doesn't matter. Wear anything.

Stuart

Is it formal?

Just put something on!

Stuart

Why's Mom crying? Mom, I'm not angry at you for putting me up for adoption. [Camille still cries] And now that I'm a Stout again, I'll always be here to take care of you. Because that's what families do. Mom, they...they take care of each other.

Ow!

TELL HIM THE TRUTH!

Stuart

You made a deal with a cat?

He had us cornered at the bottom of a cup on the fifth hole.

It was curtains.

Stuart

So you agreed to pose as my parents?

Yes.

Stuart

You lied and cheated?

Yes!

Stuart

You took me away from the Littles just when we were all so happy?

Yes!

Stuart

That's wonderful!

I think you missed something. Let me go over it again.

Stuart

That's why I've been feeling so sad! That's why I keep thinking of them! I'm not a Stout, I'm a Little! I'm Stuart Little! I'M STUART... LITTLE!

Stuart, please! You have to listen to us! The cats have decided you're too risky to keep around anymore. They ordered us to hand you over to them! As your fake father, I order you to run!

Stuart

I'll go home.

Home? No, no. That's miles from here. And it's dark out, and every cat in the city is looking for you.

Besides, you could get lost.

Stuart

No. No, I can't. Every Little in the world can find the Little house. :[Stuart drives away in his roadster.] Bye, fake father! Goodbye, fake mother!

Goodbye, fake son!

Goodbye, Stuart!

I'm gonna miss that boy.

I'm gonna miss that car.