300 people watched. Nobody did anything. They thought it was a publicity for Christ sakes.
Randy Meeks [Speaking in an Australian accent humorously]
And it would have been a good one too.
It's starting again, Randy.
Randy Meeks It's not. A lot of shit happens at the movies. People get robbed, shot, maimed, murdered. Movie theaters are very dangerous places to be these days.
[persistent]
Yeah, and you are in extreme denial.
Randy Meeks You should be too. This has nothing to do with us.
[frantic]
Randy! A guy in a ghost mask hacked up two people in a movie theater filming our life story.
Randy Meeks Coincidence?
You know what happened at Woodsboro, Randy. You can't ignore it.
Randy Meeks [speaking normally now]
I know, Sid, and I don't want to go back there again. Can't we just go back to our pseudo-quasi happy existence?
Randy Meeks [Derek, Sidney's boyfriend catches up with them]
HELLO DEREK, how you doing?
Derek [kisses Sidney]
Hi Sid, I heard you weren't in class.
Yeah I know. I skipped it because I couldn't take the "Death to her" looks.
Derek Is there anything I could do?
Yeah, do you have any tricks for getting back to a pseudo-quasi happy existence?
Derek [thinking decisively]
You know? I might just have one for that.
Randy Meeks Oh yeah, what is that?
[Derek turns to Sidney, brings her in for a couple romantic kisses while Randy looks away, jealous & embarrassed] [smiles]
That was pretty good.
Randy Meeks [Derek & Sidney walk away]
Get a room.
[Gale smokes a cigarette, stops, turns to Dewey and Randy]
Sorry. All right, Let's just assume the killer is repeating Woodsboro...
[Gale's phone rings; she answers it]
Yes?
GS Gale's Agent
[on the phone]
I have Bob calling.
I'll have to call you back. [hangs up phone]
Randy Meeks That doesn't explain Sidney's attack. Sidney wasn't killed in Woodsboro. Wasn't for a lack of trying. The killer is trying to finish what was started.
Well Sid's under protection, right?
Randy Meeks Yeah.
[Gale's phone rings again; she answers it]
What?
GS Gale's Agent
[on the phone]
Bob really needs to talk to you.
Tell Bob I'll call him back. [hangs up phone]
Deputy Dewey Riley When'd she start smoking?
Randy Meeks Ever since those nude pictures on the internet.
It was just my head. It was Jennifer Aniston's body. Anyway, you're forgetting something. In Woodsboro, there were more victims before the homestretch.; Tatum, my cameraman, Himbry...---
Time out! I don't need to be hearing about no dead cameramen, all right? Now I'm warning you guys. I am a verb away from vacating these premises. I'm gonna get me some coffee, donuts, Prozac, see If I can find some crack, Special KX, "not Malcolm and I'll be back when you guys start talking about something a little more Saved By The Bellish, all right?
Deputy Dewey Riley [Joel leaves]
He seems a little shaky.
Don't worry about him. If the killer is following a pattern, maybe we can figure out who's next.
Deputy Dewey Riley I wouldn't follow a killer's pattern. We were all involved In Woodsboro. Could be any one of us.
So what do you wanna do, bonehead? Sit here, wait and see who drops next?
Deputy Dewey Riley Well, I don't know... [Gale's phone rings again] "Phonehead"!
Randy Meeks [Gale's phone kept ringing; Randy gets her phone and answers it]
Gale's not here!---
I'm not interrupting anything, am I? You three look deep in thought. Have you ever felt a knife cut through human flesh and scrape the bone beneath? [the voice laughs evilly]
Randy Meeks It's him.
Deputy Dewey Riley Who?
Randy Meeks The killer. He can see us.
Deputy Dewey Riley Just keep him on the phone.
Randy Meeks What do you want me to say?
Deputy Dewey Riley I-I don't know. Just keep him talking. Come on, Gale.
Randy Meeks Uh... Hi. -
Deputy Dewey Riley Look for somebody with a cell phone.
Randy Meeks So, uh... what's your favorite scary movie?
Randy Meeks What do you care? Let'em have their fun. So, uh... what's up?
What's your favorite scary movie?
Randy Meeks Showgirls. Absolutely frightening. What's yours? Wait. Let me guess. The House on Soroity Row? The Dorm that dripped blood? Splatter university? Graduation day? Final exam? Am I close?
Closer than you think. [A random person bumps into Randy] Too slow, geek. Do you want to die?
Randy Meeks Is that the best you can do? Because Billy and Stu were much more original.
Why are you even here, Randy? You'll never be the leading man.
Randy Meeks ****! YOU!
No matter how hard you try, you'll never be the hero and you'll never, ever get the girl.
Randy Meeks [Randy attacks a man on a phone next to a van, believing he's the killer, but he's not]
Sorry.
Randy Meeks Oh, yeah? Well, let's re-direct the moment, Mr. I'm So Original. Huh? Where's your motivation? Huh? Why copycat two high school loser ass dickheads? Stu was a pussy ass wet rag. And Billy Loomis? Billy Loomis, what the ****? Jesus! What a rat looking homo repressed momma's boy! Why not set your goals higher, huh? You wanna be one of the big boys? Huh? Manson, Bundie, O.J, Son of...
[Ghostface attacks Randy and kills him]
Derek [Sidney is struggling to free Derek]
Oh, thank god, Sidney, I thought I was gonna be up there until opening night.
I'm gonna get you out of here. Derek, he killed Hallie.
Derek What are you talking about?
Derek Where?
Ghostface [Ghostface appears] [Speaking in the Phone Voice]
Right here. You're fast, Sid. I wouldn't do that if I were you. You really wanna trust your boyfriend? [The voice suddenly changes to Mickey's voice] Don't you know history repeats itself? Hm? Sid?
[Ghostface takes off the mask to reveal himself as Mickey, who brings out the voice changer and speaks through it]
Surprise, Sidney!
