Ratatouille quotes

View Quote Colette: I know the Gusteau style code. In every dish, Chef Gusteau always had something unexpected. I will show you. I memorized all these recipes.
Linguini: [taking notes] Always do something unexpected...
Colette: No! Follow the recipe!
Linguini: But you just said to--
Colette: No. It was his job to be unexpected. It is our job to follow the recipe.

View Quote Linguini: You're Anton Ego.
Ego: You're slow for someone in the fast lane.
Linguini: And you're thin for someone who likes food!
Ego: I don't like food, I love it. If I don't love it, I don't swallow.

View Quote Colette: People think haute cuisine is snooty, so chef must also be snooty. But not so. Lalo there ran away from home at twelve. Got hired by circus people as an acrobat. And then he get fired for messing around with the ringmaster's daughter. [pauses] Horst has done time.
Linguini: What for?
Colette: No one know for sure. He changes the story every time you asked him.
Horst: [in a series of flashbacks]
I defrauded a major corporation.
I robbed the second-largest bank in France using only a ballpoint pen.
I created a hole in the ozone over Avignon.
I killed a man with this thumb.
Colette: Don't ever play cards with Pompidou. He's been banned from Las Vegas and Monte Carlo. Larousse ran guns for the Resistance.
Linguini: Which resistance?
Colette: He won't say. Apparently, they didn't win.

View Quote Colette: So you see. We are artist, pirate. More than cooks are we.
Linguini: We?
Colette: Oui. You are one of us now, oui?
Linguini: Oui. Thank you, by the way, for all the advice about cooking.
Colette: Thank you, too.
Linguini: For what?
Colette: For taking it.

View Quote [Skinner has asked his lawyer to help him with Gusteau's will]
Lawyer: Ahem, well, the will stipulates that if after a period of two years from the date of death no heir appears, Gusteau's business interests will pass to his sous-chef, you.
Skinner: I know what the will stipulates! What I want to know is if this letter, [looks at Linguini out window] if this boy changes anything!
Lawyer: [compares Linguini's image to Gusteau's] There's not much resemblance...
Skinner: There's no resemblance, at all! He's not Gusteau's son; Gusteau had no children! And what of the timing of all this?! The deadline in the will expires in less than a month! Suddenly some boy arrives with a letter from his recently-deceased mother claiming Gusteau is his father?! Highly suspect!
Lawyer: [observes Gusteau's old toque] But the boy does not know?
Skinner: She claims she never told him, or Gusteau, and asks that I not tell!
Lawyer: Why you? What does she want?
Skinner: [disinterested] A job for the boy.
Lawyer: [takes out Gusteau's hair from toque] Only a job?
Skinner: Well...yes.
Lawyer: [folds hair in tissue] Then what are you worried about? If he works here, you'll be able to keep an eye on him while I do a little digging, find out how much of this is real. I'll need you to collect some DNA samples from the boy, hair, maybe.
Skinner: Mark my words, the whole thing is highly suspect! [nervously] He knows something...
Lawyer: Relax; he's a garbage boy. I think you can handle him. [leaves Skinner feeling uneasy]

View Quote [Django and Émile have just rescued R?my]
Django: Where are you going?
R?my: Back to the restaurant! They'll fail without me!
Django: Why do you care?
R?my: Because I'm a cook!

View Quote R?my: What are you eating?
Émile: [looks at what he's eating as if for the first time] I don't really know. I think it was some sort of wrapper once.

View Quote R?my: Dad, I...I don't know what to say.
Django: I was wrong about your friend, about you.
R?my: I don't want you to think I'm choosing this over family. I can't choose between two halves of myself.
Django: I'm not talkin' about cooking. I'm talkin' about guts.

View Quote Linguini: When I added that extra ingredient instead of following the recipe like you said, that wasn't me...either.
Colette: What do you mean?
Linguini: I mean, I wouldn't have done that. I would've followed the recipe, I would've followed your advice. I would've followed your advice 'til the ends of the Earth because I love your-r-r-r advice. But--
R?my: [In Linguini's toque, to self] Don't do it...
Linguini: [hesitantly] I have a secret. It's sort of disturbing. I have a ra--I have a ra-a-a-a--
Colette: You have a rash?
Linguini: No, no, no. I have this-this tiny, uh, little, little--[rapidly] a-tiny-chef-who-tells-me-what-to-do.

View Quote Gusteau: So, we have given up.
R?my: Why do you say that?
Gusteau: We are in a cage inside a car trunk, awaiting a future in frozen food products.
R?my: No. I'm the one in a cage; I've given up. You...are free.
Gusteau: I am only as free as you imagine me to be, as you are.
R?my: Oh please! I'm sick of pretending. I pretend I'm a rat for my father, I pretend to be a human through Linguini, I-I pretend you exist so I have someone to talk to! You only tell me stuff I already know! I know who I am! Why do I need you to tell me? Why do I need to pretend?
Gusteau: [chuckles] Ah, but you don't, R?my. You never did.

View Quote [Health inspector walks in on the rat colony, stares in shock for a moment, then runs away]
R?my: Stop that health inspector!
Django: Delta team, go, go, go!

View Quote [Colette walks into the kitchen and sees the rats cooking, and looks like she's going to vomit]
Linguini: Colette, wait! Colette. You came back. Colette...
Colette: Don't say a word. If I think about it, I might change my mind. Just tell me what the rat wants to cook.

View Quote R?my: [Describing the time after Ego gave his review] It was a great night. The happiest night of my life. But the only thing predictable about life is its unpredictability. [A sign saying "CLOSED" is placed on the front door of Gusteau's] Well, we had to let Skinner and the health inspector loose, and of course they ratted us out. The food didn't matter. Once it got out there were rats in the kitchen, oh, man, the restaurant was closed, and Ego lost his job and his credibility. But don't feel too bad for him. He's doing very well as a small business investor. He seems very happy.
Rat: How do you know? [R?my pulls back the leaves behind them to reveal the rats are in the attic of a restaurant. Ego is sitting beneath them, happily toasting his fellow customers. There is a dinging sound, and R?my turns to see Colette in the kitchen, gesturing at him]
R?my: Oh, gotta go. Dinner rush.

View Quote Linguini: Can I interest you in a dessert this evening?
Ego: Don't you always?
Linguini: Which one would you like?
Ego: [to R?my, who is looking through the kitchen door window] Surprise me!

View Quote [Last lines]
Django: Yeah, that story gets better the way I tell it. [Chuckling Hey, can we get some food over here?