Jerry Landers Your Honour, I would like to call to the stand the Lord God.
Played by John Denver 
Oh, God! (1977) · 30 quotes
Oh, God! (1977) · 30 quotes
Most-quoted character in Oh, God! (1977): in 16 of its 30 quotes
Most scenes with: God (13)
Oh, uh…I-I-I-I'm-I must have drove through, uh, a car wash wi-with my windows open?
More lines from Jerry Landers
1 quote Jerry Landers Scenes with Jerry Landers
14 scenes Jerry Landers Who are you?
[speaking through an intercom] You read the note.
Jerry Landers Who's that, Artie?
God.
Jerry Landers Come on, Artie.
No, it's me, God.
Jerry Landers God.
Right, God. God Almighty. Big G.
[speaking through an intercom] How often do you talk with God?
Jerry Landers Practically never.
[speaking through an intercom] Well, you're not allowed to see me.
Jerry Landers Why not.
Because.
Jerry Landers That's no answer.
Sue me.
[speaking through an intercom] Tobacco was one of my big mistakes.
Jerry Landers Mistakes?
You try. Ostriches were a mistake. Silly-looking things. Avocados, made the pit too big. Like I say, you try.
Jerry Landers I don't belong to any church!
[speaking through an intercom] Neither do I.
[speaking through Jerry's car radio] Jerry. [Jerry, surprised, begins fiddling with the nobs] Do you want me to talk louder?
Jerry Landers Oh, God!
I thought you didn't believe in me.
Jerry Landers Uh…that's just an expression.
I'm more than that, and I want you to spread the word.
Jerry Landers You want me to tell people I've spoken with God?
[speaking through Jerry's car radio] Yes.
Jerry Landers They'll put me away.
[speaking through Jerry's car radio] You can do it, it's only one message. Moses had to handle ten.
Jerry Landers B-but you gave him tablets.
He had a bad memory.
Come take a look.
Jerry Landers I can't. I'm naked.
You think I don't know what you got? That was another little goof of mine: shame. I don't know why I thought we needed shame.
Jerry Landers You don't control our lives?!
I gave you a world and everything in it. It's all up to you.
Jerry Landers I don't believe the Red Sea, and I don't believe six days to create the world.
You're right.
Jerry Landers I am?
Tell you the honest truth, I thought about it for five days and did the whole job in one.
Jerry Landers How can you permit all the suffering that goes on in the world?
Ah, how can I permit the suffering?
Jerry Landers Yeah!
I don't permit the suffering, you do. Free will. All the choices are yours.
Oh, God "doesn't care about religion"?
Jerry Landers Well, that's what He said.
Last question.
Jerry Landers Thank God!
You're welcome.