Steward? Steward! Stu!
Yes, sir?
I say, Stu?
Yes, sir?
What've we got for dinner?
Anything you like, sir! [pulls out his pad] You might have some tomato juice, orange juice, grape juice, pineapple juice-
Hey, turn off the juice before I get electrocuted! [the steward looks bewildered] Alright, let me have one of each. [the steward starts writing it down] And, uh, two fried eggs, two scrambled eggs, two poached eggs, and two medium-boiled eggs.
...And two hard-boiled eggs. [Tomasso honks his horn in his sleep] Make that three hard-boiled eggs. And, uh, some roast beef- rare, medium, well-done, and overdone. [the steward looks bewildered again]
And two hard-boiled eggs.
...And two hard-boiled eggs. [Tomasso honks] Make that three hard-boiled eggs. And, uh, eight pieces of French pastry.
With two hard-boiled eggs.
... And two hard-boiled eggs [Tomasso honks] Make that three hard-boiled eggs. [Tomasso honks again, briefly]... And one duck egg. Uh, have you got any stewed prunes?
Yes, sir!
Well, give 'em some black coffee, that'll sober 'em up. [the steward looks bewildered again]
And two hard-boiled eggs!
...And two hard-boiled eggs- [he is cut off by a long series of honks, causing him to roll his eyes] It's either foggy out, or make that twelve more hard-boiled eggs. And steward, rush that along, because the faster it comes, the faster this convention'll be over.
Yes, sir.
Do they allow tipping on the boat?
Oh, yes sir!
Have you got two fives?
Yes, sir! [reaches in his pocket]
Well, then you won't need the ten cents I was gonna give you. [he re-enters his cabin as the steward leaves, looking put out] Well, that's fine. As long as that steward is deaf and dumb, he'll never know you're in here. [there is a knock at the door] Yes?
We've come to make up your room.
Are those my hard-boiled eggs?
I can't tell until they get in the room. Come in girls, and leave all hope behind!
