My Spy 2020 quotes

Bobbi

How was your day?

It was good. Yours?

Bobbi

Fine.

Something wrong?

Bobbi

No.

Are you sure? 'Cause it seems like something might be bothering you.

Bobbi

You helped train her how to pass a lie detector, but not me. I mean, I don't wanna be ageist here, JJ, but she is 9. She still sleeps with a night-light. I'm a professional hacker with a Master's degree in English!

We just spent a little time together. I wasn't teaching her anything.

Bobbi

Oh, well, you taught her how to place shaped charges! [shows footage]

It was just Play-Doh.

Bobbi

That's not the point.

Should I get you some Play-Doh?

Bobbi

I can get my own Play-Doh.

Are you sure? Because I'd be happy to get you some.

Bobbi

Don't you make this about the Play-Doh. This is about us! We're partners!

I already told you: you are not my partner. [Bobbi walks out] Hey! Did you make dinner?

Bobbi

Let me just hop right on that. [blinks angrily, then walks back out]

What do you do for a living?

Sophie

I'm a KGB agent posing as a 4th grader. My brother has three legs and sells crack, and my mother is a prostitute.

I don't need a machine to tell me if someone's lying.

Sophie

Yeah?

Yeah. I can smell a lie.

We're out of olive oil

There's a new bottle in the back behind the mustard. [Kate and Sophie looks at JJ] I'd... bet.

Thanks.

Sophie

Uncle Victor, why are you doing this?

You're my insurance. And don't call me "uncle". Your father and I hated each other. I'm not your family.

Sophie

I wanna go home! Take me back!

SHUT UP! Not another word!

Sophie

Mom, Mom... No! Wait... Oh my god!

Let go of my daughter! Give me my phone. I'm calling the police.

Sophie

Mom, you don't understand. I ignored your rules and went to the park. There were two jerks from school that pushed me down and it really hurt. JJ saw it. He lives upstairs. He recognized me from the building and calmly talked to the boys and told them what they did was wrong then got me ice cream to make me feel better and walked me home!

Oh. I. um. I'm sorry. This is my kid. Can I just help you?

No. it's okay. I'm good. I'm just gonna head home and gather my thoughts. Really, I'm fine. Excuse me.
[Carlos, Todd, Kate, and Sophie watch JJ walk out of the elevator injured and limping to his room]

I'm just a guy...standing in front of another guy...asking him not to shoot him.

Sophie

You messed with the wrong dude.

Bobbi

This looks like the wedding at the end of Shrek.

Sophie

I don't care about some stupid plans, JJ. [turns around] Let him have it. [blinks]

Sophie

JJ, I admire all of your tattoos. [blinks]

Bobbi

Oh, I'm gonna touch! [opens the box, tries to load a gun, but bullets flew out the magazine] Ahh! Great, teach the kid. No need to show me anything.

The objective of this exercise is to get past me. A good idea might be to cause a distraction, because otherwise, there'd be 0 chance of you getting-- [Sophie dumps fish bowl, gasps] Blueberry!