My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002) · 42 quotes
2nd most-quoted character in My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002): in 12 of its 42 quotes
Most scenes with: Toula (5)
Toula, there's two kinds of people: Greeks and everybody else who wish they were Greeks.
Gus Portokalos Welcome to my home. Over here is my brother, Ted, and his wife, Melissa, and their children, Anita, Diane and Nick. Over here, my brother Tommy, his wife Angie, and their children, Anita, Diane and Nick. And here, my brother George, his wife Freda, and their children, Anita, Diane and Nick. Taki, Sophie, Kari, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, Nick, uh, Nikki, and I am Gus.
Gus Portokalos Hello. Welcome to the Portokalos family and welcome the-the Miller family. I-I was thinking last night, um, the night before my-my daughter was gonna marry, uh, I-an Miller, that, um, you know, the root of the word Miller is a Greek word. Miller come from the Greek word "milo", which is mean apple, there you go. As many of you know, our name Portokalos is come from the Greek word "portokali", which means orange. So, okay, here tonight we have, uh, apple and orange... we all different, but, in the end, we all fruit.
Gus Portokalos It is mistake to educate women but, nobody listen to me cause now we have a boyfriend in the house! Is he nice Greek boy? Oh no no Greek! No Greek xeno! Xeno with the long hair on top of his head!
Gus You better get married soon. You're starting to look... old!
My dad has been saying that to me since I was fifteen. Because nice Greek girls are supposed to do three things in life: marry Greek boys, make Greek babies, and feed everyone until the day we die.
Gus Now, gimme a word, any word, and I show (sow) you how the root of that word is Greek.
Oh, not this again.
Gus Okay? How about arachnophobia? Arachna, that comes from the Greek word for spider, and phobia is a phobia, is mean fear. So, fear of spider, there you go.
Okay, Mr. Portokalos. How about the word kimono?
Good one.
Gus Kimono, kimono, kimono. Ha! Of course! Kimono is come from the Greek word himona, is mean winter. So, what do you wear in the wintertime to stay warm? A robe. You see: robe, kimono. There you go!
A couple more years went by, and Dad brought his mother over from Greece to live with us. Because we weren't weird enough.
Listen up, ugly Turk. You're not kidnapping me!
Gus Mama, please! The Greeks and the Turks friends now!
We told my grandma the war was over, but she still slept with a knife under her pillow.
Taki, you couldn't wait for me?
Sorry, sorry.
Sorry, sorry. Don't sorry me. Ugh. Look at this, a rash. Somebody gave me the mati.
Gus Put some Windex on. [sprays Windex on her rash]
Ohh Gus, please, please!
Gus Voula, this works! Last night, my toe was as big as my face.
'Cause, he wants to talk.
Dad, I've been going through our inventory and, um, I've noticed that we've been doing a lot of unnecessary ordering. Um, so, I've been thinking that maybe we should update our system, like, get a computer. I don't know if you remember, but I got all A's in computers. But there's a lot of new stuff to learn now, so, um, if you want, I could go to college and, um, take a few courses.
Gus Why? Why you want to leave me? [starts crying]
I'm not leaving you! Don't you want me to do something with my life?
Gus Yes! Get married! Make babies! You look so...old!
What is wrong with Toula going to school downtown?
Gus Portokalos There's drugs downtown!
What are you saying? Are you saying Toula will get involved with drugs?
Gus Portokalos No. But somebody will say to her, "Eh, take this bag down to the bus depot," and she'll do it!
She is not stupid! She's smart!
Gus Portokalos I know she's smart. So what for she needs more school? She's smart enough for a girl.
Gus Portokalos No, I... I mean... You... you know...
What? What you mean? I run the restaurant, I cook, I clean, I wash for you! And I raise three kids! And I teach Sunday school! You know? It's lucky for me I have you to tie my shoes!
Gus Portokalos Maria!
[Maria leaves the room, slamming the door, and smiles at Toula.]
Gus Portokalos Where are you going?
I'm taking a pottery class.
Gus Portokalos Ah! The Greeks invented pottery.
Gus You sneak around all over Chicago, but you never come here to ask me, can you date my daughter?
Well, I'm sorry, I'll ask you if I can date your daughter. Sir, she's thirty years old.
Gus I am the head of this house.
Okay, may I please date your daughter?
Gus Noooooo!
