Ian quotes from My Big Fat Greek Wedding (2002)

Maria

Ian, are you hungry?

Ian

Uh no, I already ate.

Maria

Okay, I make you something.

Ian

What do you do for Christmas with your family?

Uh, my mom makes roast lamb.

Ian

Mmm... with mint jelly?

No.

Ian

And...?

And...

I'm Greek, right?

Ian

Right...?

So, what happens is my dad and uncles, they fight over who gets to eat the lamb brain. And then my aunt Voula forks the eyeball and chases me around with it, try to get me to eat it, 'cause it's gonna make me smart. So, you have two cousins, I have 27 first cousins. Just 27 first cousins alone! And my whole family is big and loud. And everybody is in each other's lives and business. All the time! Like, you never just have a minute alone, just to think, 'Cause we're always together, just eating, eating, eating! The only other people we know are Greeks, 'cause Greeks marry Greeks to breed more Greeks, to be loud breeding Greek eaters.

Ian

Wow.

I woke up with this huge zit this morning.

Ian

Where?

There.

Ian

I had a huge zit this morning!

Really? Where?

Ian

Well, it was there, but it's gone now.

Why?

Ian

I put some Windex on it.

Ian

I know this great place... Zorba something... anyway, I'd love to take you there if you'd like to go.

Uh, that place, Dancing Zorba's...

Ian

Dancing Zorba's!

My family kinda owns that place.

Ian

I remember you. You're that waitress.

Seating hostess, actually.

Ian

I remember you.

Look, I was going through a phase until now. I was Frump Girl.

Ian

I don't remember Frump Girl, but I remember you.

Gus

You sneak around all over Chicago, but you never come here to ask me, can you date my daughter?

Ian

Well, I'm sorry, I'll ask you if I can date your daughter. Sir, she's thirty years old.

Gus

I am the head of this house.

Ian

Okay, may I please date your daughter?

Gus

Noooooo!