Agent Valentine I'd tell you to go to hell, but I think you're already there.
Played by Ethan Hawke 
Lord of War (2005) · 80 quotes
Lord of War (2005) · 80 quotes
Tied for 3rd most-quoted character in Lord of War (2005): in 4 of its 80 quotes
Most scenes with: Yuri Orlov (2)
You get rich by giving the poorest people on the planet the means to continue killing each other. Do you know why I do what I do? I mean, there are more prestigous assignments. Keeping track of nuclear arsenals. You'd think that more critical to world security. But, it's not. No. Nine out of ten war victims today are killed with assault rifles and small arms. Like yours. Those nuclear missiles, they're sitting in their silos. Your AK-47, that is the real weapon of mass destruction.
More lines from Agent Valentine
1 quote Agent Valentine Scenes with Agent Valentine
2 scenes
Enjoy it.
Jack Valentine
What?
This. Tell me I'm everything you despise. That I'm the personification of evil. That I'm what- responsible for the breakdown of the fabric of society and world order. I'm a one-man genocide. Say everything you want to say to me now. Because you don't have long.
Agent Valentine Yuri Orlov.
Mbizi You run from us?!
Agent Valentine No, Mbizi! No!
Mbizi Can you run with no legs? Let me make him disappear, Mr. Valentine! Around here, people disappear all the time!
Agent Valentine I can't do that!
Mbizi Look where we are. Who will know?
Agent Valentine We will! He's gonna get what's coming to him.
Mbizi I'm not as certain.
Agent Valentine All right, get up.
What's the charge?
Agent Valentine What are you doing in Sierra Leone?
I'm on safari.
Agent Valentine Yeah? You're hunting wildebeests with a submachine gun?
Do you also work with the Park Service? Hunting without a license, is that the charge?
Agent Valentine Why are we playing games? You traffic arms.
Trade.
Agent Valentine Trade, traffic. You get rich by giving the poorest people on the planet the means to continue killing each other. Do you know why I do what I do? I mean, there are more prestigious assignments. [sits on crate facing Yuri] Keeping track of nuclear arsenals, you'd think that more critical to world security, but it's not. No, nine out of ten war victims today are killed with assault rifles and small arms like yours. Those nuclear missiles, they sit in their silos. Your AK-47, that is the real weapon of mass destruction.
I don't want people dead, Agent Valentine. I don't put a gun to anybody's head and make them shoot. I admit, a shooting war is better for business, but I prefer people to fire my guns and miss, just as long as they're firing. [Valentine stands in frustration] Can I go now? You've got nothing on me. Except cuffs.
Agent Valentine Since you're so concerned with the law, you must know that I'm legally permitted to hold you for twenty-four hours without charging you. You might ask why I would do that and I can assure you it's not because I enjoy your company, because I don't. No. The reason why I will delay you for every second of the permissible twenty-four hours is I am delaying your deadly trade and the deaths of your victims. I don't think of it as taking a day from you, but giving a day to them. Some innocent man, woman or child is going to have an extra day on this Earth because you're not free. So, I will see you in twenty-three hours and fifty-five minutes, hmm? [drives away and local Sierre Leonean villagers disassemble plane overnight with Yuri watching]
