A character in Little Giants (1994)

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson quotes from Little Giants (1994)

Played by Danny Pritchett Little Giants (1994) · 27 quotes

Tied for 3rd most-quoted character in Little Giants (1994): in 6 of its 27 quotes
Most scenes with: Rudy Zolteck (4), Jake "Berminator" Berman (3), Danny O'Shea (3)

Scenes with Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

6 scenes

We never get picked for anything. Life stinks!

Yeah, there goes my shot at the pros. I'm gonna have to be a senator.

Here's a kiss for Murphy. And for Patterson and Briggs too. [Farts loudly]

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson
[Laughing]
[Laughing while waving his hand]

Whoo! Whoo!

Murphy
[Enters with Briggs and Patterson]

UGH! Damn, Zol-fart! What kind of roadkill did your mom feed you last night?

Free-range skunk.

[After Spike's been transferred to the Cowboys]

Great, now they have Spike.

And we got nothing.

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

We got us.

Yeah! We stink!

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

'Cause you can't catch, Hot Hands.

At least he can walk, Crush Jerk.

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

Hey Zolteck, have another Pop Tart!

Yeah, fart boy, or can't you open your big mouth wide enough?!?

Okay, guys, that's enough.

Junior Floyd

Yeah, Coach's right. Break it up.

Oh, shut up, Junior! You're so good, it makes us sick!

Junior Floyd
[Pause]

Hey, you don't want me to play? No problemo. I'm outta here. [Leaves]

Nice work! If it wasn't for him, we wouldn't even have a team.

Marcus, the kicker

Hey, if it wasn't for him, maybe you'd stop drooling and played a little more football!

Yeah!

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

Why can't we all just play together?

Oh, shut up, dipstick! You're probably the main reason Spike quit!

Yeah, quit bawling you big baby!

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

I can cry if I want! It's a free country! I can even do this! [kicks Rudy's leg]

Ow! Ow!

Marcus, the kicker
[Coach Danny O'Shea's jaw drops in his shock] [Impressed]

Nice kick.

[Little Giants walks away]

Guys, practice isn't over yet.

Who cares?

Sean Murphy
[As the Cowboys have possession of the ball; to Rudy]

Get ready dog breath. Because when I'm finished with you, you'll be farting out of your mouth and talking out of your butt!

[To "Rad Tad"]

Is that physically possible?

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson
[The Cowboys hike the ball and Spike gains enough yards for a first down; during the play, Murphy sends Rudy flying and landing on his face; After the play, the Little Giants check on Rudy, who's still down]

Are you all right?

[Talking out of his butt]

I think so.

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson
[Impressed]

Huh! I guess it is possible.

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson
[Receiving their uniforms on game day, after Becky has left to join the cheerleaders]

Death shrouds.

[Turns one around]

They've got your names on the back.

So the guys at the morgue can identify the bodies.

[When the Little Giants, losing at the half, want to be put on the injured list]

You know, there is something you guys should know. When I was 10 years old, I put myself on the injured list. I never got off it.

Because I didn't get picked a few times, so I started hiding under the bleachers.

Marcus "The Toe"

That's where we belong. Under the bleachers.

No, you don't. You guys belong out there with those Cowboys. You know how I know that? Because I belong out there with my brother.

Give us a break, coach. You could never beat Kevin O'Shea at anything!

That's not true. I did beat him once.

When we were kids. We used to race our bikes down Cherry Hill every day after school. We raced every day and he always beat me, but one time - one time i beat him.

You beat Kevin down Cherry Hill?

Yes, I did. He ate my dust.

Johnny "Viper" Vennaro

Big deal. One time.

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

You know, one time at Randy Cooper's swim party, I did a backflip off the high dive, and my brother chickened out.

Marcus "The Toe"

Roger chickened out? He's a Marine!

Ah, that's nothing! One time at the spring carnival, I beat both of my brothers in the Cow Dung Toss.

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

You beat Matt and Brad in the turd toss?

You know, one time I went fishing with my entire family, and I was the only one that didn't throw up.

Marcus "The Toe"

So what? It still doesn't make us good football players.

Well, wait a second, guys. Who said you had to be good to play football? You play football because you want to. You play football because it's fun. You play football so you and pretend you're Joe Montana throwing a touchdown pass, or Emmitt Smith going for a long run, and even if those Cowboys are better than you guys, even if they beat you 99 times out of 100, that still leaves.

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

One time.

One time.

Junior Floyd
[Smiles]

Yeah...one time!

Tad "Rad Tad" Simpson

I should've gone to summer school!

Other characters in Little Giants